Monthly Archives: January 2010

Internets

Sexy Scobie Will Retweet Your Hate

Photo credit: JD Lasica - Robert Scoble and his wife Maryam

Robert Scoble, respected tech pundit, has rules about who he retweets. Important tech news? No. Lucid opinion on one of his comments? No, sir. Who does he retweet?

@Scobleizer I have an opinion about you! Do I get retweeted now? :D about 12 hours ago from TweetDeck

@XerxesQados no, to be retweeted you have to hate me. :-) about 12 hours ago from web in reply to XerxesQados

Having “haters” seems to be a popular topic on teh intartubes lately, and Scobie is known for staying on trend. Besides, everyone knows Scobalicious doesn’t get in twitter fights. He will not respond to your negativity!

Seems @Scobleizer has a lot of haters. I’ve never understood why. I wouldn’t even know, except he retweets them pretty frequently. about 12 hours ago from web

Who hates Scobie??? Who has time to actually HATE that guy? It would be like hating a beanbag. A beanbag with a twitter.  Anyway, Scobester doesn’t really care if you don’t like him. Your hate makes him stronger!

@dgentry everything interesting in life has haters, I’ve discovered. about 13 hours ago from web in reply to dgentry

Ding ding ding! There you go, once again if you have detractors then it means you are doing something right, or interesting, or original. Don’t you people feel ashamed of yourselves! You haters should go get lives and just let Scobie be great!

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Internets

Internet Awaits Mary Rambin's New Site

Mary Rambin – mermaid, shopper, person who eats – is launching a new site tomorrow.

What will it be? My “sister”* has this to say about the new format:

Building out a website based on a blog (instead of it just being a blog) is a big step for me as an entrepreneur in the digital space.  On the new MTM, there will be less “lifecasting” posts, but the majority of the content will be based on our life experiences.  There is a difference.  In a magazine you have  a couple articles where the writers have actually used the products and services they are recommending.  Here, our experience will be the basis for reporting so people can see how it applies to their daily life.  The new contributors are educated, honest, and so much fun to work with.  I know my readers will benefit from the introduction.

Does this mean no more pics of Mary in Mexico?

* Sarcasm.

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Internets

Without Sklarge Mediaite Has Nothing To Say

Amidst rumors that Rachel Sklar, Editor-at-Sklarge, is leaving Mediate, the email newsletter has evidently gone into give-a-shit mode.

The subject of the Mediate email has said (no subject) for several days. Is this just an oversight, or something more sinister? Perhaps without the anal retentive tentacles of Sklarge beating the backs of the newsletter team this type of mistake is to be expected.

Either way they should probably fix that.  Or not. Whatever!

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Internets

Sarah Lacy Does Not Talk Shit

Sarah Lacy, globetrotter, is preparing once again to offend her friends and possibly flee her smelly neighborhood – presumably for equally smelly locations:

ugh. that time of year again. ted insufferable-ness is starting. time to offend all my friends, turn off twitter or leave the country 6:58 PM Jan 29th from web

(you know, leave the country and actually report on challenges in the emerging world not sit in a room and talk with rich ppl abt them.) 6:59 PM Jan 29th from web

I hope she leaves the country again! It’s been weeks since we got a report on what other places smell like, or how they screw up visas.

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Fashion Blogging Internets

Love Puppy Demands That You Love Her

Today I was instructed by my loving and adoring fans who are all jealous of me to check out yet another Park Slope Princess. Pigeon toed Love Puppy up there has some blog where she takes pictures of herself in shit she bought at goodwill and tells us how awse she is, and demands that you agree or gtfo.

I’ve seen the blog and I find it boring as all hell, frankly. I could give a liquid shit what Jessica is wearing. I don’t even care what *I* wear. I also find her whole “I am SO f**kING FASHION” attitude kind of offputting and just not my thing. So I’ve pretty much just ignored her.

Of course that’s not why I don’t care about her blog. Apparently the reason I don’t like Pigeon Toes’ blog is because I am…OMG GUESS! Guess, guys! You’ll never guess!

And I’ve come to this. Nasty comments stem from jealousy issues 99% of the time, especially on personal style/lifestyle websites and blogs. Its jealous of being in the second row at fashion week instead of the first, jealous of someone else’s budget, looks or popularity. Jealous of someone else’s skills or creativity.

Because if you’re not jealous of those things, why are you being so nasty? Also, why are you being anonymous?! If you have the bollocks to say shhh, why can’t you stand up behind it? (Trolls!)

That’s right, the final, defensive excuse for any negative reaction to your blog? Them b***hes is jealous! If you are not ego fellating self-absorbed Brooklyn hipster blogstars, you are jealous. You are a jealous hater and you just want to be so so fabulous like the Brooklyn hipster blogstars. Just admit it!

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Internets

Caroline McCarthy Needs A Witty Title Here

OMG BEARS McCarthy is a typical twitter user – she spent most of her night making attempts at funnies about the State Of The Union thing, and being just like whelmed about the iPad.

Now that we’ve gotten the iPad and State of the Union out of the way, I can just talk about the final season of Lost all the time. Right? 29 minutes ago from TweetDeck

Of COURSE she’s bored. Bears has some real news – something something BLAH BLAH…Bears needs apartment in SF!

The best lead I have on an SF apt sublet so far is in the Marina. I’m telling you this now so that you have 2 months to fine-tune the jokes. about 22 hours ago from TweetDeck

Hahahah! Bears needs to live near a steady supply of fish…cause she’s a bear…fish…yeah, I’m going to need those 2 months to think up jokes.

We have to find Bearsy a super sexy SF pad. Maybe something down in the smelly Mission district by Sarah Lacy!

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Internets

You Can Not Has Sklarge iPad

If you take your iPad with you in the ocean, you’re more likely to get eaten by a shark. 4 minutes ago from TweetDeck

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Internets

Julia Allison Is Going To Kick Your Ass

Julia Allison, the Dutch elm disease of the internet, is going to kick your ass, ho!

Raakhee better watch her back after calling being an ex of Julia Allison a “con”! In her piece about some eligible dudes, she mentioned some Ben. Rocko could find nothing wrong with the guy besides the fact that he once shagged a founder fiend:

Cons: Used to date Internet fame-chaser Julia Allison.

Miss Jools had a little something to say about that:

You wanna start sumpin? DO YOU!? Cuz Jools is walkin around with Franky and Shorty with some chains and rolls of quarters, singing about being a Jet all the way, and if they run into you…

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Internets

Writing Is A Burden Sarah Cannot Bear Quietly

Sarah Lacy has a twitter, and it is slowly becoming the repository of all her whinging. What does she complain about? HER CHOSEN CAREER.

To be fair, she hasn’t been too annoying about it this week (maybe because she finally went to the doctor and got herself some damn drugs) but there are still the random wah wah writing is hard work moments:

bad news: chapter sucks. good news: i think i know how to fix it. #authorpain 4:34 PM Jan 22nd from web

techcrunch post i’m working on is making my head hurt. :( 3:56 PM Jan 23rd from web

time for my second pot of coffee and some book writing about 16 hours ago from web

I  mean…yawn, right? Golly writing is hard, my head hurts! I’m not saying writing isn’t hard. I listen to writer friends complain all day long about how they are blocked, or their last piece bombed, or how they’d rather being playing baseball with a raccoon than deal with their editor. It’s part of being friends with writers. But these people don’t post wah wah on their twitters nonstop – they don’t complain to their audience about how much work they do for THEM.

It might be because at the end of the day, most writers feel extremely lucky to be doing something they love while getting paid for it, even if it is sometimes tougher than other times. Most writers don’t act like they are doing their readers a favour by deigning to emerge from bed and pound out words that week. They don’t expect sympathy because they have to write when they are sick, and they don’t demand respect because they are a paid writer muas and you’re not. They just write and get paid and feel grateful for any modicum of success they get.

I’m sick of new media writers. Get off my internets and go back to your local free zine where you belong.

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Internets

Obliterati Does Not Want You To Miss This!

Another month, another chance to group egowank!

I know most of you attend the Obliterati pahty, because you are young, urban, new media superstars and OP is THE place to be. How could you want to miss this?!

Well I’m not going to let you. Get your vintage chucks and your american apparel hoodie with the ironic PBR stains, and head over to OP’s new location:

As most of you who have come to previous events know, we have outgrown the rather small capacity at Destination…We are happy to announce that the NEW LOCATION for the event is going to be “R BAR” located at 218 Bowery Street (Btwn. Prince & Spring)

So fkn popular, you don’t even KNOW! So many people want to join Peter Feld at a bar to get swag bags full of Geritol and Icy Hot and season 4 of “Murder She Wrote” on dvd that they had to find a new venue. And if you think that’s the only exciting news, wooboy hang on to your ass!

Thrillist will be raffling some awesome giveaways as well as providing a red carpet step and repeat, so great ready to have your photo taken!

Yes, randomtumblrwhores, you can show up and get your photo taken on a red carpet!OMFGWTFBBQTIONS!

I don’t understand why they don’t just put some bouncers at the door and turn away all the random tumblr tots and scenewhores that show up. Why are they not embarrassed that once a month they get together to celebrate themselves and fb invite the lower class wannabes in to validate them with their cooing and fawning? It would be an actual EVENT if they were selective about who they invited and let in. As it stands it’s basically like a tumblr meetup with more self-important swaggering.

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Internets

Robert Scoble Declares Things Dead, Oh Wait

Robert Scoble, arbiter of all things durrrr, covers his slips about as well as Meghan McCain on Jeopardy.  While we all respect and admire Scobie for his on-target insights into the tech world, we must remember that we all make mistakes and must sometimes correct them. With twitter!

Watching all the late night TV show issues with Conan and Leno. That would never happen on the web. Why? Unlimited supply. TV is dead. about 9 hours ago from web

The oracle speaks! TV IS DEAD! Throw out your tv and get on hulu! DEAD do you hear? Dead…oh ooops.

Whenever someone says something is “dead” it never really dies. It just means it is boring. Radio didn’t kill newspapers. TV didn’t kill rdo about 9 hours ago from web

Of course, on the web what’s really dead are TV-company executives. Here you don’t “program” media. No need for that. Less need for execs. about 8 hours ago from web

Ah, ok, back to our regularly scheduled Scoble! That’s not what he meant except he meant that but not what you think he meant, let him clarify!

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Internets

thatgirlallison Is Going To Talk About It

thatgirlallison has finally broken her two week silence. In a post that embodies the sadness that is her blog, she talks about some guy she met at a halloween party and began dating. It apparently started off hot and fast:

From right off the bat, he told me how much he liked me and there was no question of whether or not I thought he was being honest.  He told me all the time that I was gorgeous and sweet, and I often baked for him.

The gentleman even left a toothbrush at her house, and after three weeks informed her that he wasn’t seeing anyone else, which is basically spanish fly to a girl like Allison. In an image you can store away for a later nightmare:

We didn’t sleep together until we were dating for a month and a half, and ended up only sleeping together once.

Well, after that the  guy detached and drifted off. Allison invited him to see Wicked – the offer every straight man in NYC is secretly hoping for from random blogger chicks – but she says, “he was going into work after that to catch up on some stuff and the mentioned that he was going to a party after.  He didn’t invite me.  That irked me.”

He then started ignoring her, and Allison spent a few weeks moping about her pink shithole before writing him off. Who saw this coming???

Now it’s time for you to throw your bets in as to who the mystery man from the Halloween party was. What kind of man would strike strong and fast, and fade away after banging his latest tumblr triumph? What a mystery!

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Internets

Do You Want To Work For This Man?

Are you looking for a job? Do you enjoy wearing tshirts from Goodwill, reciting Beastie Boys lyrics, and drinking beer, and can you do these things ironically? Then does Rachel’s Boyfriend David Karp have a job for you: Tumblr is hiring a webdev!

You will need the following hard to find sk1llz: PHP/HTML, SQL, js, CSS, command of lolcat language, and be a tumblr user.

If you are one of the 900 million high school students with this complicated skillset, apply here now!

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