Monthly Archives: June 2012

Healthy Living Blogging

Carrots ‘n’ Cake Thinks She Is No Longer Sweet

Yesterday on Carrots ‘n’ Cake, Tina shared with readers how she beat her sugar addiction.  On the surface it seems like a pretty open and shut case. WHO KNEW!?

Hold the phone Ms. Honesty. I thought you already learned how to “take control” of your love of sweets.

I still experience cravings, but when a craving for something sweet strikes, I don’t immediately run to the nearest cookie or brownie. I’ve found healthy alternatives for my cravings, including fruit smoothies, flavored Greek yogurt with granola, and sweet potato wedges (which I cook ahead of time and keep in my refrigerator for when cravings strike). Sometimes, even just eating a second serving of veggies or salad from lunch or dinner prevents me from reaching for dessert. Each day gets a little easier, and my progress has come a long way. Remaining control of my cravings (and giving in to them in moderation) is what keeps me on the path to a healthier lifestyle!

Did you forget too? Is that why you didn’t include that article from February in your post?

In any case, if you are even a semi-regular reader of Carrots ‘n’ Cake, you probably reacted to yesterday’s post the same way I did, with a big “WTF!?”. Tina, we all know you like your sweets. It’s even okay that you do. But don’t even try to dupe readers into believing that you have conquered Sugarland when you clearly still indulge. As michigancherry points out, in the last month alone you’ve succumbed to the sugar fairy on numerous occasions.

Furthermore, if you still claim you beat this sugar addiction, how do you explain this?

I’m left with a few questions. What is the point of claiming you’ve taken control of your sugar cravings when the evidence seems to say otherwise? Why not just say “Like I Give A f**k”  and own up to the fact that you like to indulge?

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Healthy Living Blogging

KERF Would Like You to Know She’s Got A Small Bump

Kath Younger, the most pregnant woman ever, is now 30 weeks pregnant with The Most Important Baby Of Our Time. Lest we forget that every single thing about her pregnancy is unique and a first in the history of human reproduction, Kath is recording every fascinating moment over at her BERF blog – and yesterday she informed us that her genetics are so spectacular she can barely form a preg-gut:

I’m still waiting for my stomach to really grow. I’m starting to think it’s just something in my genetics or frame that means I’ll look on the smaller side this whole time. Sometimes I think it looks huge, but I have had so many people tell me how small I am for 30 weeks. Just this weekend at the market two women commented. I’m not complaining – I’m glad to sport a smaller bump – it’s just so unexpected!

Darling KERF went on to humblebrag to former pregnancy pal CaitlinHTP “…I feel like my stomach is still basically flat – I can see my toes without really even noticing it – but then I came home from an hour at the gym looking in the mirrors and decided that it was bigger than it feels.”

Considering she’s been been wearing maternity clothes since the stick turned blue I can understand she must be devastated that she’s not the size of Octomom Round Two at this stage in her loaf baking; however, I don’t understand her claim that she is “on the smaller side”. She looks about normal for 30 weeks to me. But of course Kath can’t be 50th percentile pregnancy so we get a post about how she’s just not huge like other pregnant women, she’s just built small, she’ll probably not get big.

I look forward to her revising this claim in 8 weeks.

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Mommy Blogging

Is That Wife Preparing For Another Bathroom Baby?

Jenna Cole, victim of Mormon racism and e-book advocate, is finally off at college doing high educated person things and trying to lose weight. Well…she was trying. Seems she’s throwing in the towel on her “That Weight Loss Challenge 3”, announcing on her blog that she’s “putting my weight loss efforts on hold” until she gets through school. According to Jenna she will also be halting any weight loss posts for the summer, saying:

I have my whole life to lose weight. This chance to finish school in person, sitting in classrooms discussing what we’ve read and what it means, isn’t going to come again for me. I want to give as much of myself to the experience as I can mentally handle.

However a source tells us this excuse is a bunch of bullhockey, claiming “She’s told friends she’s pregnant again. That’s why she’s not doing the diet, she’s too sick from morning sickness.” Could Jenna be expecting little Bathroom Baby 2? Or, free from the locked up cheese regime, has she simply packed on a cheese baby?

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SOMI

Stay On My Internets: Vintage Vixen

Vintage Vixen. For once a blog leaves me almost snarkless. I tried to reach deep and find some snark to post about her. I really did. I know you guys love the snark. So I wanted to portray it as cringey, I wanted to muster up a bitchy “act your age, woman!”, I really wanted to make a joke about Cher. But I just can’t. She seems to be having such a great time all the time, and to be so lacking in f’s to give that I can’t help but feeling all of my “LOL WTF?” from a place of love.

I mean, I had some snark when I first started following her. But somehow I lost it. Fine, I admit it, she grew on me. She’s like the wacky Aunt Flora of the internet. You’re sort of embarrassed by her at first, but when you grow up you see she’s just a free spirit who follows her own drum; and while you still shake your head at her you can’t help but smile because she’s just so weird and fun.

Anyway, Vintage Vixen is apparently the blog of a 40-something woman who posts her personal style and her doings such as camping and trotting about in plastic flower bikinis and going to “festivals”. There’s nothing really offensive about her. She could be anyone’s odd relative or neighbor, unremarkable beyond the fact that she is wearing a tambourine as a hat or using rollerskates as a purse or something. Honestly I might only be returning to her blog because I want to see what she wears that denim vest with next which I’m sure is not the most compelling reason to post about her. But how could I not share this with you, fellow GOMIBLOGers?

So what do you think: is Vix a SOMI for you?

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Healthy Living Blogging

Kath Eats Real Papers

As she closes in on the finish line, Kath is finally starting to realize that there’s more to babies than fun times and  adorableness. No, one can’t just simply nurture a fetus into adulthood through real food and body pump; unfortunately additional tedious tasks are required. Tasks which Kerf claim are worse than baby poop. Tasks like the difficult administrative paperwork that comes with birthing a new human. Please note that she is “not an expert” and will look into these things soon. “Probably.” Because why bother with the annoying, time consuming little details that may impact your child’s life later on?

Her list includes two things that I would think all new parents would prioritize: writing a will and deciding on guardianship in the unlikely event that both parents expire. Kerf admits that she doesn’t even have a will, since she “thinks” that “in most states married couples pass on all of their assets to their spouse upon death, and then their children when both spouses die.” At this point with an established marriage and family writing a will seems a bit “unnecessary.” Now, I’m not any type of parent or will expert, so I have no idea if wills are really that necessary. But they usually seem like a good idea, especially once children are added into the equation, not to mention owning a home and a business. To me it seems like one of those “it couldn’t hurt” to have items, despite the minor hassle of writing one and making sure it’s valid. At the very least, Kerf could bother herself with looking into what happens to their estate without a will if both she and her husband pass away.

Kerf follows the pesky will item with the issue of guardianship, calling that particular paperwork “unlikely” and “probably another thing to get in legal writing.” All somewhat valid points, but again- why not just suck it up and do it? It may never be needed, but it would be incredibly important to have if it was. I can’t imagine that either of these documents would take all that long to settle, and once they’re written you only have to address them again if any changes need to be made. As far as I am aware, it’s all a very straightforward process. Nothing that can compare to as “worse than poop.”

You never know what’s going to happen and part of being a parent is being prepared for the unlikely and providing for your children’s care in the event that you are unable to anymore. It’s very basic stuff that are necessary evils of adulthood. Kerf may hem and haw and wish that she didn’t have to bother with the dull intricacies of parenthood, but unfortunately the bad comes with the good. There is no “probably” about it. If Kerf is overwhelmed now just thinking about paperwork, she might want to brace herself for the next 18 years.

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Lifestyle Blogging

That’s Quirky Reveals Not Amazing Dining Room Makeover

Jessica and Adam Quirk, lifestyle wannabloggers, are finally sharing the visual ipecac which is their dining room makeover. The Quirks explain their design choices using language they no doubt picked up reading Apartment Therapy:

Selecting paint colors was my biggest challenge. The living and dining rooms are connected through a large arch and I wanted each room to look different, but also flow through smoothly. My vintage globe collection, black and white rugs and accents in the living room and the original wood trim were my main concerns. And I finally got that black wall I’ve been dreaming of! I love how it shows off our old house walls which are so full of character!

Pairing blue walls with a black accent wall and a dark wood dining set is certainly a matter of personal taste I suppose, but I can’t help thinking it must feel like they are eating their meals inside a giant bruise.

Whatever. They made kind of a big deal about this makeover so maybe my expectations were too high. We are talking about Messica, after all, so I’m not sure why I expected something with a little more style. It seems their attempt at lifestyle blogging is going to be as riveting as Messica’s attempt at style blogging. Meaning, not interesting at all. I think this marks the end of me giving a crap about the Quirks.

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Mommy Blogging

Dooce Dares You To Insinuate She’s Racist

Heather Armstrong, not that kind of mommyblogger, threw a surprisingly normal and adorable birthday party for her 3 year old. There was Costco food and a regular old sheet cake, bubble machine toys, friends and family. It was all very average and not all twee mommy blogger, as Dooce Vader reminded us several times.

It seemed like a pleasant day that could have been turned into a pleasant post about her pleasant life. Instead, true to form, El Dooce took the opportunity to make passive aggressive digs at her detractors:

My gift to her was a piñata, and because I know nothing about piñatas I had to trust Tyrant’s judgment. He’s half Mexican, so, you know, he learned how to hit a piñata before the doctor cut his umbilical cord. OH! PLEASE TAKE ME SERIOUSLY. Please tell me that I’m being insensitive and that I should know better. Because when it comes to Weimaraners and Mexicans I AM OUT OF CONTROL!

She continued her sarcastic attempt at humor with a bizarre reaction to the suggestion that quarters be placed into the pinata:

And then Tyrant says, “We should throw in a few rolls of quarters.”

The? A few rolls of quarters? Those things would come flying out of that piñata, hit a kid in the head and knock him out. MEXICANS ARE MURDERERS!

Now I’m sure ole Dooce was trying to stave off any comments that she is culturally insensitive by pre-emptively taking pot shots at herself. But was there really a need for that? Is this simply her writing style, and I just don’t get the joke? Because it doesn’t come off as hilariously self-deprecating, it comes off as being defensive on the offense. Was she really that worried that people would make comments about getting her kid a pinata for her party?

I honestly can’t tell anymore if she’s just trying to goad people into starting crap with her to prop up her dying blog, or if she’s really that insecure and sensitive to any remarks about anything she does. If it’s the former perhaps she should cut to the chase and start spilling about the separation – as one GOMIBLOGer said, “That’s all people care about. Juicy details will bring the clicks.” If it’s the latter then maybe she should start considering a different career already before she runs off the readers she has left with her increasingly bitter defensiveness.

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