Monthly Archives: October 2012

Lifestyle Blogging

“Butch Lesbian” Is A Halloween Costume

With Halloween on the way many bloggers are indulging in some “ironic” cosplay. One such blogger is “Mish Lovin’ Life”, who decided this year to go as a “butch lesbian”.

I think what scares me the most……is just how easy it was for me to convert to a lesbian {or perhaps a little Filipino boy?}.
No really, I’m just a hair slick, tummy stuff, sports bra wearin’ step away.
And boom.
There ya have it.
Meet Mitch, my lesbian alter ego.

She then included a picture of herself in full costume:

The LGBT community is still fighting for marriage equality and anti-bigotry in general. Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t think they should be turned into costume characters. I’m honestly starting to think Halloween is just an excuse for some people to try really hard to be either offensive or skanky. But maybe I’m being oversensitive?

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Healthy Living Blogging

Skinny Runner Only Goes “Kenyan” In The Summer

“Skinny Runner”, who ‘chose the name “skinnyrunner“ purely for marketing reasons’, has been playing with all of the beauty swag she’s accumulated lately. She reviewed some eye shadows, some skin care products, some hair stuff. Then she told us she didn’t really like the bronzer she got:

I ended using all of the Supergoop sunscreen (had never even heard of it before), and although I really like the Lorac bronzer, it’s very dark so I can only use it in the summer when I’m going all Kenyan.  I definitely wish it were lighter.

Ok, is “Kenyan” some kind of bronzer shade I don’t know about? I’m not really up on makeup, so maybe this is some word used to describe some new skin “look”. Or does she mean she travels to Kenya each summer? That has to be what it means, because I’m having trouble otherwise understanding why a blonde haired blue eyed white woman would talk about “going all Kenyan”.

That has to be it. Right?

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Mommy Blogging

Project Babies Wants You To Think About The “Big Picture”

Project Babies‘ Kristin, political expert, has made it clear how she decides her position on political issues in the past. Now she’s defending her devotion to Romney in terms we can all understand:

You heard right – social issues are simply not important if people can’t afford valet parking at the mall. When a few of her followers tried to tell her that social issues were just as important as her being able to take vacations in France and buy “Latino-inspired” outfits for her baby to attend festivals, she schooled them but good:

As folks continued trying to explain to her that a “thriving economy” doesn’t really make up for the possible loss of reproductive freedom, marriage equality, and other social issues, she responded with an intelligent and well thought out rebuttal:

Well then. I don’t know about you, but I am making “Kristin For POTUS 2016″ buttons as we speak!

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Lifestyle Blogging

Issa Waters Thinks You All Hate Fat People

In case Issa, thinks everything is anti-fat people,  wasn’t clear in her last rant about things she doesn’t want you to say, she has provided yet another long list of things not to say entitled “21 Things to Stop Saying Unless You Hate Fat People”.

The numbered list includes such forbidden phrases and topics as “anything about dieting, eating less, or exercising more”, saying “a specific size, shape, or weight that’s less okay”, ”any statements about “childhood obesity””, and, with a stunning lack of self-awareness, she adds “[g]oing on and on and on about your opinion” to the list of “things that contribute to the very real abuse of and discrimination against fat people”.

Predictably this latest edition of “let’s talk about how everyone hates fat people omg stop talking about how you hate fat people!” attracted comments that she didn’t want to hear. This prompted Issa to add a couple of lovely postscripts to her original post:

Okay, gloves off people. If you read this post and then decide to make a comment explaining how fat is unhealthy, congratu-f******-lations, you hate fat people. What you are doing is ignorant, hateful, and harmful to our lives…We get it. You hate us. This list is for people who DON’T and who want to make changes in themselves….If your comment amounts to more lecturing about health, it’s going straight into the trash.

I don’t understand why someone would post a list that is basically the internet equivalent of a waving a red flag in front of fat haters, and then get pissed off when a bunch of people come in and try to tell them why being fat is wrong. And I really don’t understand why someone would do it repeatedly. Is she expecting a different result?

Issa I’m sorry you’re getting comments that displease you, but face it: you’ve been doing these “FAT IS AWESOMEEEE!” posts for a long, long time. You know what the typical response is going to be every single time you hit ‘publish’. If you can’t just turn on moderation and handle the comments by now without tacking on some aggro bird flipping addendum to your post , then maybe you should just turn off comments altogether.

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Mommy Blogging

Nat The Fat Rat Discussed “Rape Fantasies”, Internet Says “WTF?”

Natalie Holbrook, from that “Nat the Fat Rat” site, went back to Utah for a visit recently. During her recap of the trip, she described a lovely time spent crafting and filming and apparently putting Diet Coke in her pants (hey, I skimmed ok?). Then out of nowhere:

then there was a mid-craft two-hour rio break in the middle with my sister and the hackworth and the ceej in which we discussed, what else? sex and rape fantasies. in utah this is what you talk about.

and then the party!

Needless to say, some people were not really thrilled about this little aside, and began furiously commenting their displeasure. Natalie finally deleted the statement and then removed any reference to it in her comments:

regarding the drama: i have removed the sentence in question, as well as any and all comments referring to it, because i didn’t mean it like that AT ALL. in fact, i’m entirely embarrassed and frustrated by it. i’ve closed the comments, it was getting out of hand.

Stating that “this as a temporary update for those of you who were checking back frequently (i’ll delete it in a few hours)”, she also says that “in the future, if i say something off-color that offends you, please know it was not done on purpose”. So, ya know, stop being…

hurtful to me because you feel you should get to “take me down a notch” or because it makes you feel better about something, i’ll delete your comment and feel sorry for your mother, who obviously never managed to teach you any manners. (it’ll also ruin my day, which i’m sure is what you’re going for.)

Yes Natalie, obviously people only comment in a negative way to ruin your sunshiney day because they have no manners. It has nothing to do with the fact that there are people whose lives may have been touched by rape, who maybe don’t find little behind-the-hand-giggling anecdotes about you and your oh-so-edgy friends endearing or particularly worth mentioning at all, and maybe wanted to share their feelings about your statement. You know, maybe that.

But hey, she’s going to delete it soon so basically it’s like this never happened.

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Internets

Companies Will Use Pictures Of Your Baby From The Internet

Mandy somebody, posts about her kid at Harper’s Happenings, learned today that an image of the child she has posted public pictures of since birth was being used to sell ironic onesies without her permission:

The 15 people on planet earth who recognize this kid immediately set about sending twitter alerts. The Mandy person tried to goad the Chive into responding by sending out a sarcastic tweet, which is how bloggers handle such things:

Ok, honestly if I were this Mandy chick I’d mostly be angry that my kid was wearing something with that tired old “Keep Calm” meme (can that please die already?) across her belly. Anyway, the company apparently removed the image pretty soon after being informed.

Now what I want to know is, why can’t bloggers ever handle anything with a private, professional email and then drop it in public? Why must there always be public tweets or blog posts to stir up drama? Can bloggers just not deal with any problem unless they get attention for it?

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Lifestyle Blogging

Jenna Cole Knows What Women Want

Jenna Cole, has a degree, knows all about politics and the economy. More importantly, she knows what women really want out of life: babies!

That’s right folks: Jenna knows that if you want to have kids you cannot have a heavy duty career as well. That’s why there are simply no women with children working in high powered job positions! And while we’re at it, let’s just admit a few other home truths as well:

Thank you, Jenna! Finally someone brave enough to acknowledge the truth: diversity in the workplace is bad for business! I’m so tired of people thinking that trying to have different types of people in the workforce is good for the economy. Everyone knows that the best way to run a company is to hire the same type of person over and over.

Let’s all take a moment to applaud Jenna on her well-informed and thoroughly thought out statements. It’s people like Jenna who will truly move America into the 21st century.

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Internets WTF

Michelle Will Wear Her Afro Wig And Change Your View Of White Blonde Girls

Michelle Joni finally came up with the perfect stunt to blog about – the white woman with long blonde hair is making wearing an afro wig “the central gravitational theme of my life story”. Whether at fried chicken festivals (“obviously an occasion to wear the fro”) or at pinkberry rocking her “Gucci fanny pack circa 2004″, she continues what she calls an “act of genuine hair admiration”.

The thing about me is, though, I have always been misunderstood. Misunderstood by groups of friends, people who know me from afar, and even by myself. I have always had people who dislike me, who push back on my ideas, and who don’t appreciate me.

Obviously all these unappreciative people eventually started asking “wtf?” in her comments, prompting her to respond with a typical self-centered blogger post:

It’s 2012. Fried chicken is an American food. It’s a Korean food. I think it’s one of the most delicious foods on earth. By pointing out that it’s also something very much embraced by black culture, which just happens to be associated with my afro, I am not mocking! If I felt I was mocking, I’d stay far away from it. If someone did a blog post about chicken soup and related it to Jewish culture, I would not be offended.

Basically saying sorry I’m not sorry, I guess you losers just don’t get the joke, and a dismissal of someone’s concerns with what amounts to ‘I’m Jewish! If you make Jewish jokes I wouldn’t care! Why is everyone upset’ is not really the way to respond to accusations of cultural appropriation in my opinion. But in an attempt to placate those who find her project racist, she has exchanged her black afro for a new wig:

 

For some reason I feel like she missed the point in the criticism, but it’s a blogger we’re talking about here. Do they ever really listen?

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Internets

Etsy Wants To Sell You Some Pink Stuff

Breast cancer activists around the internet are waving pitchforks at Etsy, the “indie” internet shopping site popular among twee and wannatwee bloggers, for joining in the October retail ritual of “pinkwashing”.

It seems Etsy sent out a promotional email with the tagline “Tickled Pink: Show your love to the women in your life with Breast Cancer Awareness Month”,  featuring all pink products in several categories. The problem seems to be that only a few of the items have anything to do with Breast Cancer research or awareness.

Blogger “Pink Goose” writes: “Etsy’s lack of ethics and oversight is bad enough. The fact that the majority of sellers are craven opportunists profiting off of our disease with cheap “handmade” crap is bad enough. But the fact that [people] like little miss Nichole actually promote these people as part of a fun, happy “Tickeled Pink” marketing email is beyond infuriating.” When Nicole Smith began getting twitter call outs for the promotional email, she responded simply “Thanks so much for bringing this to my attention. Always appreciate the feedback on how to improve and grow.”

Honestly I’m not sure what people expected of Etsy. They are, for all their crowing about being independent and not just some cog in the capitalist pig dog machine of manufactured consumerism, a shopping site. Meaning, their goal is to make you buy crap from their sellers so they can make money. It’s not surprising (especially considering their mostly young and twee consumer base) that they are using Breast Cancer Awareness Month as an excuse to try and sell people pink crap. Every other retailer is doing the same thing. Etsy isn’t some little shopping hugcircle run by three friends from their dining room, it’s a million dollar company with dozens of employees; in other words, a business. Don’t let their cute little “community for sellers” schtick fool you – their goal is to make money, not make sure your sensibilities remain intact.

That said, I have to agree with one community commenter who said “We don’t need general ‘awareness’ – we need action. Action as in — more, better measures for prevention, more access to better testing, more money for research, more access to treatment and recovery services. Simply coloring everything pink doesn’t do that.”

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Lifestyle Blogging

Mandajuice Is Just Like A Burn Victim

Amanda, runs the mental image inducing named blog Mandajuice, is struggling with the greatest challenge known to a woman’s self-esteem – successfully losing weight. Apparently losing 30 something pounds has now left her “literally…half the woman” she used to be, and her mind is breaking under the Janus like reactions of her ego and her feminism:

There’s nothing sweeter to a fat girl’s ego than being called skinny. It actually turns me on to hear it.  But then my inner feminist says f**k YOU! I am not the number in the back of my pants!

And lest it remain unclear that she is super way totally thin now, she will provide anecdotes to prove that she’s super way totally thin now:

Now I’m literally a bag of bones and skin. Don’t even get me started on how Joel thinks I need to start wearing flats because heels make my legs look “too skinny.” Even the kids have complained – when I lay on my back to snuggle them, my ribs and hip bones are apparently too “pokey.”

Not to be rude, but here’s an idea – eat more food if you are having trouble being a “bag of bones”. But I guess being logical would rob Mandajuice of the opportunity to work through her former fat girl syndrome in front of the internet:

My life has been painful and twisted in ways I’ve only just begun to understand. And my skin – all of it – is the way I wear that history on my body for everyone to see. I’m like a burn victim – permanently scarred. My skin tells the story of how I survived a jump out of the 20th floor window of a burning building and how much braver/stronger/better I am for it.

Wait…what? Amanda jumped out of a burning building? Where’s THAT story? That would be much more interesting than listening to some woman talk about how she “ISN’T a size 14” anymore after months of being someone who eats “juuuuuust enough and then pushes her plate away sans regret”. I mean, congratulations and all, but you didn’t accomplish anything more exciting than what Jessica Simpson is getting paid to do.

Maybe Amanda should spend more time asking her “inner feminist” what an actual burn victim would think of her comparison that having floppy boobs is just like having disfiguring injuries, and less time back door back patting herself via blog post.

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Internets WTF

Wife Of Accused Man Will Explain Why Child Porn Isn’t So Bad

Meet Mrs. Handbasket. Back in January she announced to the internets that her husband is “under investigation for possession of child cornography”.

Child cornography carries a special stigma in our society. Those who look at child corn are equated with those who sexually abuse children and record that abuse.

While the rest of us all say “No duh, Dick Tracy” Mrs. Handbasket has spent the last few months explaining why what her husband did is simply no big deal:

The standard explanation, when it comes to child corn, is that possessing images of children enduring sexual abuse is like abusing the children all over again…But let’s look at the photo of a murder scene. Who would claim that looking at the images of the murdered person is like murdering that person all over again? If I look at images of a child who has been beaten, is that like me beating the child myself? I can’t think that anyone would argue that.

She uses this bizarre rationale again and again while repeatedly reminding us that sex fantasies are not a crime and continually claiming that it’s not fair that “Both society and the justice system treat child corn users the same as child molesters”. She just wishes society would understand!

It is hard to expose my husband to the risk of whatever nasty judgments people might make about him, especially when I have seen so clearly his courage, his determination, and his love for the kids and me.

Yes, let’s focus on his feelings. He has apparently since been charged with receipt of child cornography, and Mrs. Handbasket is standing by her man – even gloating that her marriage “is better than ever”.  Her husband, the real victim here, might be off to prison soon, so won’t you take some time to offer some support? After all, it’s not like he did anything to deserve it.

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Mommy Blogging

Back On Our Internets: Mama Bear

About a year after closing up her former blog, an old GOMIBLOG favorite returns – and there are some changes. For one, she now goes by “Mama Bear”, for obvious reasons:

Yes folks, Love Life Lace is  back, and omghappier than ever.

I have to say that this pregnancy has made me the happiest I can probably ever remember being. I’ve struggled a lot with anxiety, depression and PMDD and I was very worried about how the pregnancy would affect me emotionally so I am thrilled that I’ve been feeling great! In fact if it weren’t for the occasional aches and pains I would probably want to be pregnant always! In addition to that my skin has never looked better so I’m really soaking in all the positives of this pregnancy.

I’m sorry but I can’t snark on her today. She seems really happy and that’s a cute outfit (though I’m sick to death of chevrons). It looks like they did a good job fixing up that mountain cabin as well, though I have no idea where on earth they intend to stick another human being in that place.

So welcome back, Tatiana! You were missed around GOMIBLOG. Stay around a while this time, won’t you?

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Mommy Blogging

“Mckmama” Bankruptcy Ends With A Whimper

Jennifer McKinney, the former Mycharmingkids.net, was forced by the Lord Himself more than 4 months ago to pay off her debts. Now, just days after her blog has finally gone offline, Mckdrama has signed a “waiver of discharge” and apparently agreed to pay off her creditors.

Blogger type Tracy says the bankruptcy “was almost certainly going to be denied anyway”, and is of the opinion that they “probably agreed to this in the hope that criminal charges would not be forthcoming” regarding possible attempts to deceive the bankruptcy court.

Regardless of the reasons, this is a pretty snooze inducing outcome considering all the arm waving and screeching that went on from both sides during all of this. But hey, maybe if they are charged with something they will pack up the kids and move to a non-extradition country. Just imagine the fictionalized accounts on Law & Order and Lifetime (“Never Gettin’ My Moneys: The Mckmama Back Taxes Story”), her finally opening a new blog in order to dispute the weight America’s Most Wanted described her at. Then we can see some REAL Mckdrama!

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