Monthly Archives: November 2014

Fashion Blogging Internets

Pink Peonies Finally Admits She’s Pregnant

Pink Peonies, allegedly makes a million dollars per year, has finally ended months of speculation and admitted she has a little Rstyle link in her uterus.

As you can see from my growing belly, there’s a new addition coming to the Parcell family in spring 2015…

She’s been claiming for months that she’s just eating too many ‘peanut m&ms’ but the GOMIBLOG Pregnancy Test never fails.

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DIY Blogging

Young House Love Returns To Redesign Site

Curated! Time capsule!

Curated! Time capsule!

Young House Love, ‘accidental authors’, returned briefly in order to redesign their site. After the flounce heard ’round the internet, they continued to sporadically update their instagram but have otherwise remained silent. Now they have quietly come back to reconfigure the site to be less of a blog and more of a static catalog of their projects.

We figure it makes more sense for our project gallery to become our site’s front page since we’ve cataloged over 900 projects over the years (you know, instead of staring at the same old post forever)…Happy DIYing!

Saying the site is “a time capsule of sorts” the couple also updated their “About” page to past tense phrasing, apparently indicating once and for all that they’re done updating YHL.

And with that “omg no1curr Alice” post I take my leave probably until Monday to celebrate the holiday of “Drink With Your Friends And Ignore Your Parents’ Phone Calls”. Unless someone sends me an omgwtf story tip, of course. Feel free to use this post as the Thanksgiving Open Post because I know everyone is over YHL, and follow me on Instagram or Facebook if you get super bored and want to see what I’m doing while I ignore you hams. Happy American Thanksgiving!

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Mommy Blogging WTF

Cecily Continues To Stand Up For “Brown Children”

No, you can't. So why are you talking?

No, you can’t. So why are you talking?

Cecily Kellogg, couchtivist, is yet again throwing her weight at her keyboard in order to stand beside those wronged by the Ferguson Decision. In a piece she claims she was “asked to write”, Cecily compares being on food stamps and watching some kids throw rocks at baby birds to the feelings of helplessness and frustration in the African American community. She then muses about the unfairness of having a white child.

Tonight too many of my friends are crawling into bed with their brown children and weeping because they don’t know if tomorrow or next week or next year it will be their child shot while his arms are raised in surrender…I will never know that fear. My pale skinned, blue-eyed daughter will most likely never be shot by the police, no matter how badly she behaves. I have never been more aware of that than I am tonight.

She goes on to say she “will take action” though we all know what action usually means for Cecily.

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Mommy Blogging

Kathy Would Like To Highlight The Safety Features Of This Car

Yes, THANKFULLY.

Yes, THANKFULLY.

Kathy Balman, has a cluttered mind, reviewed a car this weekend. And what’s the best way to review a car? Take a picture during dangerous driving conditions. While you’re driving.

At least she didn’t make a video or hold up alcohol, but come on. What was she thinking?

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Fashion Blogging

Atlantic-Pacific Presents A Reminder To Always Check Your Reflection

loloops

Looks like in her rush to post a classic bubble bath pic to Instagram, Blair Eadie of Atlantic-Pacific accidentally posted a full frontal (bits in above photo censored by me, but I assure you every inch of her was visible).

Remember kids, check those photos before you share them with the entire planet. And may I say that is quite a waxing job!

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Mommy Blogging

Kelle Hampton Gave A Fangirl A Gift

Happy Birthday! Enjoy my terrified child!

Happy Birthday! Enjoy my terrified child!

Kelle Hampton, has no boundaries, recently surprised a rabid fangirl for her birthday. Her gift? Her daughter, Nella.

Kelle brought her children to the fancujo’s vacation rental during the woman’s birthday party. The woman said it was hard to catch Kelle’s son Dash, who ran around as toddlers do, but she “did manage to scoop him up for a second, though, & smother him with kisses”. But her main focus was Nella.

I wanted to hold this one in my arms since the day she was born & I finally got a chance to, although all she wanted was her Mama.  To lift her up and hold & kiss her, though, was heavenly.  A dream come true.  I am so in love with this precious little girl.

The woman then commented basically the same thing on Kelle’s instagram, because heaven forbid everyone not know she got to meet the famous Hampton kid.

STRANGER DANGER

STRANGER DANGER

I don’t know about you hams, but I don’t think I’d feel comfortable producing my children for a heavily invested internet stranger to slobber over. Sure there were lots of other people around so it’s not like the woman could knock Kelle over the head and run off with Nella. But, as someone in the forum said, this sets a precedent. Now ALL her fanpoodles will want a similar opportunity.

Mommy bloggers are just so, so strange.

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Fashion Blogging

The Sartorialist Is Familiar With Indian Culture

Actually just a street sweeper.

Actually just a street sweeper.

Scott Schuman, the shortorialist, is living it up since his split with Garance. He’s currently traveling the world, and is sharing photos from India. Everything was buttkissing and fawning until he posted this photo, labeling the woman pictured an ‘untouchable’.

The response was immediate and full of ‘wait, wut?’ Commenters explained to him that the woman was simply a street sweeper, and basically called him an asshamper for even using the word.

Why do you invent “tragic concepts” where none exist ? If you saw her as an untouchable its in your eyes and cunning controversial mind . You are the worst myopic traveller ever and to think we Indians idolised you, lol. You are so disappointing!!!

Scott responded that he ‘didn’t just make it up. I was told that by local people I was with while shooting’ with commenters responding that ‘the term was banned and is offensive, the fact that you don’t share their culture and believes wouldn’t allow you to understand the sensitivity of the term’. Another commenter called it ‘pure discrimination’ and said ‘Didn’t know we were back in the 1700′s’.

While it’s conceivable Scott didn’t know the term would be so offensive, he has decided to dig in and defend the use of the word rather than apologize and change the caption.

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Internets Mommy Blogging

Katie Vyktoriah Victimized Yet Again

Katie Vyktoriah, the mom who claimed her son was assaulted at a Wal-Mart for wearing a pink headband, is back and more victimy than ever. This time the mistreatment magnet says Comcast chased her down by phone after she complained about their downtime via twitter.

Saying she “was HELLA confused because I can’t for the life of me figure out how they got my number”, she recounts a conversation verbatim (evidently from memory), in which a customer service representative was allegedly patronizing and sexist (“By your own admission, it worked when your husband did it last night. So he can probably get it to work again.”) to the point of forcing her to hang up on the pigdog man.

I hung up the phone, absolutely amazed at the conversation I just had. I genuinely was racking my brains trying to figure out who might be prank calling me because I could not for the life of me imagine a company calling me out of the blue just to insult me and make me feel like an idiot. But before I could really think too hard about it, the phone rang again.

She claims the customer service rep’s manager immediately called her back…and, she says, asked her to move away from her screaming children because he couldn’t hear her answers before explaining to her that since they weren’t using a Comcast modem, they couldn’t really help her. But the outrage does not end there.

I’m also rather confused as to how they 1) got my telephone number and 2) knew what account I was associated with. Our internet service is 100% in Mark’s name, and with his number. THEY called ME, I assume because of the tweet I sent, and then proceeded to insult me and demand more money. They were able to view our account details, despite me never giving them any information. As far as I’m aware, from my Twitter account the only thing they should have been able to see was my name and the city I’m in.

Brilliant Katie concludes this bizarre tl;dr attempt at inciting anti-corporate outrage (she even tagged the post ‘controversy’) by saying “And people wonder why Net Neutrality is such a big issue”. She then called Hulu a “cornographic Pool of Filth” and longed for Google Fiber.

There was no mention of threatening pizzas.

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Mommy Blogging

Dooce Will Reward Her Child With Cosleeping

Dooce, conqueror of October and texting injury survivor, is still single parenting since her ex allegedly adiosed to the east coast. The adjustment apparently includes continued sleep drama. But don’t worry, Il Doochay has figured out how to give her daughter the comfort of cosleeping AND get her to do things!

On Thursday nights I let Leta sleep with me as a way to reward her for the hours of homework and piano practice she’s accomplished over the course of the week. We chose Thursdays because that’s the night of her piano lesson, and it commemorates that weekly milestone.

I. Yeah. Just…can one of you moms out there tell me if this is normal? Like…the physical comfort of sleeping closeness is…a reward? I mean, I came from a family that was firmly ‘kids in their own beds’, so maybe it’s normal to reward a high strung, middle-of-a-divorce 10 year old for doing their homework by letting them share mom’s bed once a week. Maybe you moms can shed some light on that for me.

Also, the rest of the post contains security video of Dooce’s elderly neighbor knocking on her door at 4 am during a dementia episode. So, be sure not to miss that total respect of a neighbor’s privacy.

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DIY Blogging

Chris Loves Julia Is Reducing Sponsored Posts

Chris Loves Julia, practically begging the internet to accept them as YHL’s replacement, were the victims of a “hate session” in their blog comments Friday. It seems some readers finally had enough of the sponsored posts and spoke up. One commenter pointed out that they “had to go back 6 posts for an actual non-sponsored decor post”, while others said they now assume any post is either sponsored or a hint hint hoping for a sponsor.

Well on Monday they pulled the Meaningful Partnerships Only card (9 points in Bloggers The Gathering) and declared they will no longer do indiscriminate advertorials.

Based on your comments, as well as similar feelings we’ve had recently, we’ve made the decision to no longer accept sponsorships from all non-project related sponsors…Going forward, we will let our plans and projects guide the partnerships we choose.

Commenters of course immediately rushed in to assure Julia they will read no matter what, urging them not to listen to haters and complaining about all the hate in the comments from the haters, and included the usual “not sure why people are whining”, “it’s YOUR blog!”, and a few comparisons to Young House Love which no doubt made Julia moisten her drawers for hours.

But hey, at least blogs are starting to get it – readers don’t like nonstop advertorials. Baby steps, I guess.

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Mommy Blogging

Kate Oliver Will Take Her Pictures No Matter What

Kate Oliver, instagram “famous”, posted a picture the other day of her son sleeping on a table at a cafe.

This is why people hate mommies.

This is why people hate mommies.

 

Well today she posted a photo showing how she accomplished that shot.

Feet on public tables, nothing rude about that.

Feet on public tables, nothing rude about that.

Behold, the lengths attention whore mommies will go to for an instagram worthy photo. How is this safe or sanitary or polite? This is a public space. Ratchet back, ladies. There are other people in the world.

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Lifestyle Blogging Mommy Blogging

Love Taza Can’t Even Put Their Kids To Sleep Without The Internet

Josh Davis of Love Taza, there could be a ‘trail mix of tears’ joke in here if I wanted to be culturally insensitive, posted today about how he is a great – no, the greatest father ever. Mr. Derp took over the blog to let everyone know he spent last evening telling his daughter she was the snowflakiest snowflake that ever snowflaked. Then suddenly, emotions!

I thought she had fallen asleep, but then I heard her bring her hand up to her face and move it back and forth…I got worried and cracked open the window curtain only to see her eyes wet. “Eleanor, are you OK?” No answer. “Eleanor, were you crying?” She nodded. “Were you crying because you were happy or sad?” “Happy,” she whispered back.

He explained that even though he spent most of his super entrepreneurially employed days giving his children “feedback and coaching”, he feels it important to have special Snowflake Building Time (or whatever parents call it) to let them know how amazeca$h they are. And since the entire family depends on the blog to provide most of their money, though Josh initially felt the moment was “so special I thought to keep it to myself” obviously he had to post about it; because if a blogger parents their children and doesn’t smear it all over the internet, did it really happen?

Ugh, how depressing to be those kids. They can’t even go to bed and decompress without Emperor Derp up in their face yammering about his feels until they cry, and then using it as blog fodder.

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Internets Mommy Blogging

World Prays As Dooce Continues To Recover From Texting Injury

In shocking health news, Dooce, ever bravely suffering, has revealed she’s been bravely suffering from a horrible, painful injury for months.

One Saturday afternoon in early August I texted so much and so furiously that I woke up the next morning with a shooting pain in my right thumb. I could barely move it and began texting with my index and middle fingers.

Telling a nurse she “texted too hard”, Dooce was able to bravely make it to a sports doctor who gave her a shot of prednisone and sent her home to bravely suffer and freak out on twitter.

It seems Dooce’s thumb requires more pain management, even after a second trip to the doctor for more shots. Saying she has “become fascinated by the human capacity to endure pain”, she went on to compare her hand x-ray to her mother’s cancer treatment before telling us she is “now exploring other doctors and options” to deal with her incapacitating situation.

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