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Barefoot Blonde Says The Reporter Didn’t Like Her

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Amber Clark, super relatable, took a moment out of her busy bikini filled day to comment on a profile piece about her in The Atlantic. The profile wasn’t really all that flattering, and Amber knows why – apparently the reporter wasn’t a fangirl.

In a highly professional and mature move the plastic hair farmer explained why she wasn’t portrayed as her true, amazing at all things self.

…Bianca (the reporter) came to spend 3 hours with us and i could tell from the moment she got there that she did not like us and had her mind made up about us prior to walking in the door. This article would have been negative regardless of what I did or said.

She went on to claim the reporter “took so many things out of context that it’s sickening”. Though she went into some detail with the reporter about the ways they were making their new ‘custom home’ a photoshoot/sponsorship wonderland (“The more our house becomes Pinnable, the more it leads back to the website”), she says in her comment that their new home “is not being built around “likes” and she completely took anything regarding the home totally out of context”. And despite telling the reporter “We always have to think of our life as ‘Where can you take the prettiest pictures?” Amber tried to get back on brand by playing the “effortless” card.

Any of my long time readers also know what kind of person I am. Me and my family just have fun living life together and document and share it online from time to time. There is NO “formula”.

Amber’s hissy fit complete, she ended with a perky “Thanks!” and presumably got back to her stressful life.

  1. JuliasTooSmallTutu

    Did she expect to be described as a "flaxen haired beauty with tawny limbs" in The Altantic? Has she ever read it? She came off like an idiot because that's what she gave the reporter. Showing up in the comments just solidifies everything in the article which is that she's a thin skinned narcissist.

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    • barefoot hillbilly

      She has probably never read the Atlantic before now.

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      • a world of no

        I would bet money she had never *heard* of the Atlantic before now.

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        • Who ate all the butter?

          What???? It's not just an ocean?

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    • Jezehell

      It was pretty close to that, actually.

      "She has the golden locks, lithe frame, and wholesome femininity associated with prom queens who date quarterbacks"

      But the girl

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  2. Headpat Junquie

    Fillerup as in "fill 'er up"? I always assumed that was a joke. Reporters aren't paid to like their subjects.

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  3. Michelle

    Honestly, I thought the reporter was pretty nice, considering all the material she could have written about. You can't be "famous" without having to take criticism along the way. I think the points that the reporter brought up hit a little too close to home for Amber.

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    • Apeeling Attire

      The reporting was great precisely because there was almost zero editorial commentary. It's a nuanced, intelligent splicing of direct quotes from other people + info from outside sources + direct, empirical observation in order to construct an article that paints a clear and distinct picture of Amber as a loon.

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    • agatha fisty

      Personally i find it interesting how she monetizes her life (doesnt mean i find it tasteful, but then i dont have to make her choices, its not my life) If she was smart she'd stop apologizing for herself and use articles like this or criticism to point out how she is a successful business woman; this is how she pays for her family and lifestyle. she, and other mommy bloggers, have taken a template of domestic life and made it incredibly appealing to a large segment of the population. it comes under scrutiny when she denies it; thats when everyone calls bullshit and she gets the criticism. the article itself doesnt paint her as a terrible stage mother or idiot, it simply points to how she generates revenue with photographs and sponsors. denying that makes her look stupid, not a bunch of floppy beach hat photos- stop the lil ol' me schtick and own it.

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    • OverItAll

      I agree. Thank you!

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    • LaverneandHurling

      Yeah, it wasn't the mocking tone I thought it might be given her response. I think she was upset BECAUSE her formula was revealed and now they can't un-ring this bell. Any fangirl dumb enough to think they're just capturing moments now knows it's all staged.
      She also probably thought they were just chatting and that half her admissions were off the record.

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      • hashtag

        I agree, except your line: "any fangirl dumb enough to think they're just capturing moments now knows it's all staged."

        Any fangirl dumb enough to appreciate Amber is NOT reading the Atlantic. That's why Amber should ignore the article and move on... the audiences for the Atlantic and Barefoot Blonde likely do not overlap much, if at all.

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  4. Convulsing Diaphragm, Uncontrollable Spasms

    "As we talked, she adjusted the colors in the pictures, giving them the warm pastel hues characteristic of wedding portraits. She assured me that she stops short of Photoshopping appearances, then reconsidered: “Sometimes I’ll whiten teeth.”"

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    • Convulsing Diaphragm, Uncontrollable Spasms


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      • carlee

        You win the internet today!!!!! LOL

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      • Saint Dorothy Mantooth

        A++++ gif deployment.

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    • The Mr. Beaumont

      I think the fact that she sat there editing photos during the interview also reveals a lot about Amber's personality. Pretty rude!

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      • Desperately Seeking Snarky Username

        I imagine the reporter probably told Amber to continue with whatever she was doing before the reporter arrived. I don't think that's uncommon for pieces like this.

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  5. Principal Vagina

    "me and my family". Girl, you make things so easy

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  6. bi-polar acid trip haiku

    Oh, this was fun! Reading the article and then the comments?! Like getting a surprise package at the door, and opening it up to find it is full of all kinds of amazing things to unwrap lol.
    What I think is great, is how Amber opened up as much as she did in regards to not only their formula, but how they contrive and pre-plan their content.
    Also pretty sure that's a big part of why she's so upset about it, lol. D'oh! Didn't know the things I said would actually be printed! I thought she was here to just write about how pretty we are!
    So, Amber, from now on, any time you swear up and down you are just living that carefree life and are just so happy to share it with the world, bc whatever..... there is written, documented proof that it's all fake bullshit and you are doing nothing but obsessing over how to make your next dollar.
    I'm relieved to see this shit-show professionally exposed for what it *really is.

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    • The Mr. Beaumont

      Seriously. This article and the comments have given me LIFE.

      which probably means I need to spend less time on the internet.....

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    • LaverneandHurling

      Yep, and Amber probably thought it was just a get to know you time and didn't realize this was "on the record" so to speak.

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  7. Headpat Junquie

    I wonder if she's ever really done the math. Professional models, photographers and advertising agencies would cost her sponsors a lot more $$$ than what they pay her.

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  8. KAS

    Ugh, can't believe Taza got a shoutout in that article.

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    • Notarize!

      Plus Dooce must do an evil cackle every time they continue, not only to mention her but to interview her as well, like, screw you, b***hes! I'll always be relevant as the first mommy blogger EVER!

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  9. Purple21

    I thought the reporter actually presented her pretty well. It's a business, just as McDonalds is a business, and whether you like it or hate it, you have to concede that they fulfil their business model. Amber probably expected a gushy article about beautiful parents, beautiful children living this idyllic lifestyle, but the reporter wrote about the business of mommy/ lifestyle blogging, using Amber as an example of someone who does it successfully.
    Amber is selling herself short by having a hissy fit at this article - it sounds like she's fallen for the illusion of her own story, rather than acknowledging that it is a job. If she's going to deny the gap between appearance and reality, the kids are going to have some impossible standards to meet when they stop being cute.

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    • E

      "It sounds like she's fallen for the illusion of her own story, rather than acknowledging that it is a job."
      Exactly!! Spot on.

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  10. burstpipes

    Amazing that anyone, even Amber, could find that article to be negative. To me it comes across as remarkably even-handed, even positive considering what dolts they are.

    Simply mesmerizing to hear the details of how they've chosen to design the house, to make it more of an all-season photo studio.

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    • Trashosaurus

      Yeah, I didn't think that the piece was negative at all. I wouldn't have thought a thing about it if not for the hissy fit.

      Everyone knows that big bloggers stage life around their blog. And frankly, I don't think that's a big deal. If it's your job then that's fine. But a lot of bloggers seem to think that nobody knows this, and get REALLY offended if somebody shatters the illusion. I mean, why? Do you honestly think your readers are that stupid? We know you photoshop (and it's okay, to a point) we know you stage outings (and it's okay, to a point) and we know that your posts are often sponsored. Why insist on the song and dance about how "real" you are?

      Honestly, the most "real, honest, authentic and SO BRAVE" thing bloggers like Barefoot Blonde could do at this point is admit that smoke and mirrors are part of the gig. I think they would get a lot more respect this way.

      But no, we have to cry every time a journalist bursts the shiny bubble for our readers.

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  11. sparkle tits

    Her husband quit law school to be her candid photo photographer....... What are they planning to do in a few years when the blogging and instagram fame fades because they are older and their kids aren't adorable babies anymore? Continue to sell hair extensions? I hope they are putting some of that blogging money in the bank for the future.

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    • Purple21

      That sent a shiver down my spine too - why would you quit law school because your wife is bringing in money on a lifestyle blog? Mind you, a lot of people go to law school because it sounds impressive, or because their parents have a dream of having a son/ daughter who's a lawyer. So maybe he just needed any excuse to quit.
      And married couples who have the attitude, "Well now that he/ she's earning good money, I don't need to consider a career even later down the road" generally don't have the "let's save for a rainy day" attitude. I predict financial strife when the shaving cream commercials don't eventuate and that outdoor shower fails to recoup its investment possibilities.

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    • mr_manager

      I don't want to give her any ideas, because Mormom-god knows she reads here, but I'm assuming she'll translate her child-like writing into kid blogs and then tween blogs and then teen blogs for her ever-so-willing-to-participate-in-this-"business" children of hers.

      Or maybe she'll get famous for being one of those families that pumps out a scary number of children. (By scary, I mean like 10+)

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  12. Would any of Amber's followers even be aware of this piece in the Atlantic? It seems as though they are perhaps busy buying the perfect shirt, exercise equipment or lipstick.

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  13. C

    The article was fascinating and I thought the author was actually pretty gentle on these bloggers - she presented a fairly unbiased opinion. It was the actual quotes that mostly presented a negative image and I don't think the author is to blame for that. I loved dooces appearance on her high horse too - laughed to see her critizing these bloggers

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    • barefoot hillbilly

      I agree with you. If the author intended to be negative, she was very subtle about it. Amber's direct quotes are what made her seem vapid and materialistic. She saw her moronic ramblings written out and doesn't like it. Amber doesn't want to change her life, though. Her solution will be to never do another magazine interview, problem solved, back to Baywatch skipping through the surf in a bikini and feeding her children sand.

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