Bloggers Reveal “Things I’m Afraid To Tell You”

Some bloggers thought it would be really eye-opening to start a series called “Things I’m Afraid To Tell You.” I think it was conceived with the best of intentions but has instead spiraled into a attention-whoring, self-administered questionnaire.

Anyway, the Things I’m Afraid To Tell You stuff started after “a flood of bloggers raised their virtual hands to say that ‘Yes, they too were concerned / frustrated / flummoxed about the vast cavern between true reality and the presentation of ‘reality’ on blogs.’”

First of all: WHERE HAVE YOU ALL BEEN? We’ve been covering this shit for YEARS. You are just now deciding to show concern for bloggers being not exactly forthcoming about their carefully crafted personas?!

To combat all the virtual hand raising, bloggers are revealing intimate, embarrassing, afraid-to-tell-you details about their lives. For example, one blogger admits, “I’m surprisingly non-crafty. I don’t have the patience or attention to detail, which is why designing and styling is more up my alley.” Another poor soul says, “I have fallen out of love with running. This is perhaps the hardest thing to reveal.” And most horrifying? “I’ve acquired a little Irish accent.”

In response to all of these painful admissions, Jessica Quirk expressed admiration on her Facebook page for the collective bravery in these bloggers admitting that they aren’t crafty/athletic/accent-free.

I am so amazingly inspired by reading through the “Things I’m Afraid to Tell You” series[...]

In short – wave your freak flag and share your flawed and amazing self with the world. We owe it to each other! And thank you again for so many of you who echoed this thinking in a question I posed on Tuesday. 

I’m working up the courage to share my list (because God knows I’d rather not be trashed online once I do), but I’ll get there!! In the meantime, please check out these links! They might make YOUR day too!!

“Things I’m Afraid To Tell You” is an interesting concept and more bloggers should admit when or if they’ve purposefully altered a reader’s perception of their life or lifestyle. I’d read honest posts like that all day long. But when most of the participants are doing it for pageviews/attention/linkbacks and admitting things like ZOMG I DON’T LIKE RUNNING, it becomes a vanity exercise, pure and simple. There’s nothing brave about wanting attention.

  1. Bluebird

    I wish a blogger (or twenty) would be honest enough to write something like "My blog started out funny and interesting, but now it's full of crap. I used to write about my real life but now I only post photos or link to other places I write for money. I don't know how to give up something that died a long time ago."

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    • Lancelle from Paris

      I don't think many lifestyle bloggers actually enjoy what they do. It looks like a ton of work and for what? A few comments? A free dress or giveaway here and there? Are their egos really so demanding that they'll spend entire days orchestrating events, meals or craft projects in order to get 50-100 comments?

      It's so sad.

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      • It's my sluggish metabolism and thyroid, not the cheeseburgers and beers...

        Lancelle, This is pretty much the the day-in and day-out life of any person who enters public life.

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    • jehoshaphat

      I miss the days of blogging before monetization. Everything now feels like an overt advertisement, or and insulting attempt to pull one over on me.

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  2. RollsRoyceRevenge

    I live in a garbage can in Pittsburgh. I only have one tit--alas, it's on my neck. I throw toothy blowjobs for Blueprint Cleanse. I recently broke up with my imaginary boyfriend Sir Cankles, with whom I conducted a swan-like British affair that consisted of me drinking to excess whilst he picked lint out of his tutor's navel. Ketchup is a food group. Duct tape is clothing. Flames. Everywhere. Breathe. Yes.

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    • Jessica

      I am laughing

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    • AndyDD


      Dammit. Knocked over my vodka.

      *shaking fist at RRR*

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    • Miss Noir


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    • annoyedrunnergirl

      "I live in a garbage can in Pittsburgh". So you have been to Leetsdale? If all of you knew how depressing that town is the posts would be even funnier.

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  3. I agree and I wish more bloggers would be honest for the sake of being honest, instead of just for page views. I also agree with the point that now, because everyone is doing it a post like that is just going to come off so disingenuous to the readers. Especially because it already seems to be a came of one-upmanship to them.

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  4. I'd LOVE to see what Quirk thinks is her oh-so-revealing list...

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    • It's Always Shitty in Donkadelphia

      She's afraid to tell us that our monitors were right all along & never needed adjusting?

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    • dragonelly

      she's afraid to tell us that she's not size 6 medium anymore

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    • She's afraid to admit that she SLAM NOMS all the things.
      She's afraid to admit that her wedding dress was a hot mess.
      She's afraid to admit that she actually only wears the outfits in her OOTD photos for 1-2 hours before going back to yoga pants and slippers.
      She's afraid to admit that she still doesn't know how to spell atelier.

      ...But we already knew all those things.

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      • The Rebel Chick

        ROFL I freely admit I am in my pajamas most of the day!

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  5. Seriously?! Good lord, these bitches don't know jack shit about the real world.

    Its like,
    "I'm gonna tell you all a it goes....I'm so nerdy...tee hee!"

    Shut the fuck up unless you're willing to tell us about your gonorrhea or something of actually substance. A confession like that will get you the attention you want. Is it brave? Well that depends on whether or not you're wearing makeup.

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  6. MrsG

    Isn't most blogging a vanity exercise? Even when you're blogging about an issue, you don't start a blog about, say, special needs kids or support groups or actually anything without at least once thinking to yourself "The world must benefit from my knowledge and experience!" And I say this as a blogger. I'm not unaware of my own vainglorious tendencies, even when I'm writing something that I think might be supportive to other bloggers who share a situation particular to my own or when I'm trying to disseminate information I think is important.

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    • Yes, blogging is rather vain and I think I do it because I lack vanity in real life so I make up for it online. But I always caution people to never do as I say unless they want to risk being fucked up.

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      • bigboobedmisanthrope

        real life IS online. you're not entering another realm while asleep. promise.

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    • drhoctor2

      BUT...It is not a bad thing to know you HAVE "knowledge and experience" and the world may well benefit from your perspective. See. that is what I love about blogging/bloggers and the self pub aspect of the Internet...People get reached, educated, HELPED ..hell if they make ME laugh on a bad day...could be lifechanging !! Don't take that lightly either. One of the things that infuriated me MOST abt the Perrillo thing..they really did not KNOW the Internet would come thru like that? And they considered themselves "experienced" expert gurus of social media? The ppl who are ridiculous blogging cliches do not get that the first attraction any of us have to them is a wish to engage with other people. Done. We're humans. Think of the internet as that fire humans have always gathered around to tell stories....Social Media is ALL about (social) interaction not (media) manipulation.
      There. I solved the internet. Am a dam genius. Buy me something.

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  7. Babby Forming, Despite Life-Threatening Heels

    So brave! Bravo, bloggers!

    ::eye roll into infinity::

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    • Mimi

      So i just came from the Daybook and she put up a big story about her parents finalizing their divorce (things i'm afraid to tell you) , and while it's sad, i come from a home were my father was gone before I could take my first breathe...i'm having a hard timee feeling sorry for her and the 120 people who are boo hooing and spilling the beans about their parents and grandparents divorces.

      I don't know it's like both her parents said it's was something they both wanted, they are still active in her and her families life and all that shit holla at me and cr when you see your dad on the street and he just says hi and keeps walking while taking your cousins out to dinner after he's ducked years of child support.

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  8. Samson

    My daughter's real name isn't Faerie Fable McTwee Riley Jaydynne Whifty Poo Poo. It's Mary.

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  9. Hey bloggers, I'm afraid to tell you I think you suck. Oh wait, no I'm not.

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  10. Dee

    Hey bloggers! I'm afraid to tell you that NO1CURR.

    Look at me, so brave...

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  11. MagicallyDelicious

    My husband likes it when I penetrate his bleached anus with a dildo. But he's not gay.
    Phew, so glad I'm not afraid of that anymore.

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    • Megling

      If any of the blogs I snarked on put "I love pegging my hubby!" on their list. I would never again say a bad thing about them. Not even ThatWife.

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    • JudgementalSnarker

      I'm trying to decide if that is HTP's ZOMG British husband or the Art of Making a Baby dude.
      Or maybe both of them.

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    • Mrs Odie

      A guy who likes his nalgas tickled isn't gay unless he wants Ryan to do it (Seacrest or Gosling. If it's O'Neill, he has issues).

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  12. Angela

    Is this seriously the worst things they have been hiding??? OMG, an Irish accent!!!

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    • Random Person

      Seriously. This is like when you interview for a job and the interviewer asks you, "What are some of your weaknesses?" and you (ok, me) say, "I just get too caught up sometimes in making sure everything I do is perfect."

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    • keevz

      I read that one out of curiosity - as someone who used to have an Irish accent* myself, I thought she might have something interesting to say about assimilation, acceptance or the human need to fit in with our peers. BUT No. She just mentioned that she doesn't say 'sidewalk' or 'trash' anymore. FFS that isn't even unusual - most people manage that much vocab-change when they go on vacation (see what I did there? I woud have said 'holiday' but I changed it because I wanted to type in American accent).

      * caveat: accent re-appears when I am drunk or angry or talking to my mom (see - typing again in an American accent 'wow')

      Are there any smart bloggers out there? ANY? Is the internet just full of corn, cupcakes, crafts and twee lifestyle posing?

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      • drhoctor2

        I got some SOMI's for you...ABDPBT... smart ..Bitchy-poo..Nebsit Nance.. best "lifestyle bloggers of all TIME. The daily details of regular living WELL TOLD..fascinating SWISTLE !! That's some DAMN FINE mommy blogging THERE. (nod to Twin Peaks) Temerity Jane ..hilarious.. very engaged with her readers..cutest kid on the planet. INTERESTING. These are just ppl off the top of my head..I read a lot...
        Also..shout out again to Bitchy Poo cos Robyn is a Cat Lady EXTRAORDINAIRE I like me some cats. And ethical ppl.

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  13. New Year New You

    Oh blogtards, I think you're afraid to tell us how much your sex lives with your damp ballsack OMGhusbands suck.

    I can just tell, I've never encountered a larger group of Missionary Marys in my life.

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