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Cary Randolph Knows How To Eat

Cary Randolph Kennedy Jefferson Washington Fuller, American girl, is regularly asked by anonymous tumblr people for advice. Yesterday a curious reader wanted to know “…what is your diet like?” The American Ms. Fuller responded with her usual combination of wit and relatability:

Funny story: I was on a date recently, and the guy asked me what I like to do besides running. Paused for a moment, asked myself, What are my hobbies? Then looked him in the eye and said, “Well, I like to eat.”

So here’s a typical day in the appetite of moi: egg whites and a piece of cheese or a green juice for breakfast (plus green tea with Splenda), Cobb salad for lunch, Larabar and half-pint of blueberries in the afternoon, salad for dinner, half a PBJ for dessert.

But that’s a good day. Here’s a “bad” one: bacon-egg-and-cheese croissant for breakfast, crab cake salad with French fries for lunch, handful of M&M’s in the afternoon, martini-and-sushi binge fest and gelato at dinner.

Bottom line: eat what you want when you want it (within reason), and then kill yourself at the gym and on the trail. Feel fat? Eat less, and move more.

Did she seriously say “half a PBJ for dessert”? On a “good day”? And then instruct you pork out (within reason?) and then “kill yourself” at the gym??? Cary. CARY honey. I know you’re trying to seem “real” with your little all American PBJ anecdote but come the freck on.

And there is no universe imagined by Carl Sagan in which I would stuff myself with whatever I want and then spend hours in a gym to make up for it. That’s just swinging between extremes for no reason and smacks of a borderline eating disorder. You live in NYC where the average person walks 2 miles a day and you run marathons, Cary. I think you’re allowed french fries and binge drinking on occasion without the guilt laden aftermath of killing yourself at the gym.

WTF woman.


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