Lifestyle Blogging WTF

Khloe Kardashian ‘Flowergate’ Reaches Peak WTF

Khloe Kardashian, of the talented and classy Kardashian family, got tongues wagging Wednesday when she instagram vagueposted about a pile of flowers.

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The Daily Mail, which is sort of like CNN but for celebrity bikini pictures, quickly broke the news that Khloe had posted omgflowrz and speculated about whether they are from some guy she’s rumored to be dating.

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The problem is, neither Khloe nor the DM seem to be aware that the pic contains the best known sink on instagram.

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Yep – that pic is an old one posted last year by the Million Dolla Skalla, Ms. Rach Parcell of Pink Peonies. She’s known for herflowers in the sinkpics. The roses have nothing to do with Khloe Kardashian or that Trey person.

I know this is kind of a non-story but the whole thing is so absurd I had to share.

Update: About an hour after this post went live the Daily Mail updated their post to say “eagle eyed fans spotted” that the image “was taken from another Instagram account” and that she “borrowed the snap of the beautiful arrangement from clothing designer Rachel Parcell’s Instagram”.

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Lifestyle Blogging

Cup Of Jo Adds Another Jo Clone To Staff

Jo Goddard, Shakespeare expert, has finally found a new editor for her yawn farm, ‘Cup of Jo‘. To the surprise of nobody  the new hire is yet another skinny white brunette Brooklyn type. When commenters responded with some bewilderment that Jo hired just another Jo Clone, she replied that she is totes going to hire some diversity.

we’re hoping to hire another person later this year, and we have some great new freelancers of different races, ethnicities and sexual orientations, so please stay tuned!

Look, let’s be honest: Cup of Jo isn’t really a site targeted towards chubby wage-job having Latinas living in Orlando. It’s pretty clearly an upper middle class thin white ‘creative’ Brooklyn lady site. So I don’t even know wtf she would accomplish forcing diversity into her brand, other than getting buttpats for trying.

But hey, take that, complainers! Or something. I’m not even sure what she means by this. So she’s going to actively TRY to hire in some diversity now that people have commented on her fleet of Jos? I dunno, maybe it’s just me but it kind of smacks of tokenism to suddenly announce you’ll be bringing on “different races, ethnicities and sexual orientations” after your readers bring up your lack thereof.

 

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Lifestyle Blogging

Jordan Reid’s Dream Predicted 9/11

Jordan Reid, ramshackle trains of thought, honored Memorial Day by informing everyone she had a premonition about 9/11.

On September 11, 2001, I woke up several hours before my first class because I was startled awake by a dream in which I died in a fiery explosion. In this dream I went to heaven, where I sat on a hilltop and watched things burn way down below. I wanted to remember that dream, and sat down at my computer to start writing it down. And so I was awake when my father called to tell me about the plane that had hit the World Trade Center.

She says she ran downstairs to tell everyone but they “just kept eating breakfast” like it wasn’t a big deal because they weren’t as psychically in tune with true patriotism as Jordan.

She then reprinted a piece about how Trump is the next Hitler or something, imploring us to contemplate politics while she headed off to “go drink some beer and lay in the sun and be happy I have the day off”.

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Lifestyle Blogging

Cupcakes And Cashmere Will Elevate Your Culture’s Textiles And Then Sell Them

Emily Schuman, the clean fresh hair behind Cupcakes and Cashmere, launched her eponymous bedroom decor line this week. It allegedly sold out on the Nordstrom site within hours, though it was all back in stock like half a second later so I’m not sure how that qualifies as “sold out”.

She says she wanted the line to feel “intentional”, I guess because “intentional” is the new “curated” and can’t be used by everyone often enough to describe everything they do or buy or make. She then explains her inspiration.

The Moroccan Geo pillow is a personal favorite, with prints and tassels you might see on traditional Hammam towels, while many of the colorful, embroidered pillows are inspired by our trips to Mexico. The rainbow of pinks, golds, and greens is a bright reminder of one of my favorite places in the world.

This of course resulted in people calling Cuppy out for her “orientalist mind” and “unispired” copying of native fabrics.

…Besides your counterfeit Mexican heritage fabric, the Moroccan Geo pillow pattern is actually one found in Turkish hammam towels, not Moroccan ones. There is a difference between Turkey and Morocco…

…I’m stunned that her line blatantly copies Otomi fabric/embroidery, which is Mexican folk art made by indigenous populations in Mexico…

Culture poaching aside, the collection is about as a big a yawn farm as you’d expect from Cuppy. Safe blues and whites and beiges in patterns of ‘lace’ and ‘dot’ and ‘stripe’, and color pop/decor trends that went out in 2014. None of it really seems much more special than any Martha Stewart crap in the discount bin so I have no clue how it “sold out” but whatever. I don’t understand Cuppy’s appeal in general so maybe it’s just me.

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Internets Lifestyle Blogging

Hey Natalie Jean Leaves Blogging: “I’m just really over it”

Hey Natalie Jean, former instagram darling and book author, is saying goodbye to blogging. She says she agonized a bit over her “flounce” post.

What did I want to say in this, my very last blog post? What are the messages? The themes!? What does a reader even look for in a good flounce post anyway? I definitely wanted it to be, like, AN ESSAY. You know, one of the good ones. Make it mean something!…But the more I thought about it the more I was sure, I’m just really over it.

Thus, instead of the long thoughtful essay, she got right to the point.

So, this is it. After ten years of blogging, I am closing up shop.

Natalie says she will “leave the archives up for a bit” and might be on social media “from time to time”, though she hasn’t decided whether she will set things to private or not. She ends by saying she is “pretty proud of the career I made here, and I owe a lot to you guys”.

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Lifestyle Blogging

Jenna Wants To Remind You She Is Smokin The Pot

Jenna, still living absolutely, has been half ass hinting about smoking weed on social media since around the time she dyed her hair Cecily Kellogg pink. Well now she is determined to make it clear in case you didn’t get those hints – Jenna is smoking the marijuanas.

I SMOKE WEED HEY LOOK I SMOKE WEED

Yep, That Wife is now totes a stoner u guiz. The 31 year old mother of two posted this to snapchat so you would be in no doubt that she is super San Francisco hipster cool now. Nevermind that even Martha Stewart knows how to roll – smoking pot obviously makes you super cool and Jenna needs you to know she is cool now and smoking pot.

Of course there’s never been any actual evidence of Jenna actually imbibing actual pot, just a lot of her talking about it and teeheeing about omgweed. So who knows wtf she’s trying to prove with this snap, because anyone can take a pic of a dispensary. But ok. Sure.

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

Kiel James Patrick Confuses His Followers

Kiel James Patrick, the Gatsby of social media, evidently posted a weird instagram pic implying he was facetiming with Gigi Hadid and his wife.

um....what?

The post seems to have disappeared from his feed. That’s ok; the original is still on his wife’s gram feed.

wait...double what?

So…can someone explain what that was? Did Sarah screenshot the same facetime and crop out the gents? Or did KJP photoshop a faketime convo to impress…I’m not sure who?

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Fashion Blogging Lifestyle Blogging

Pink Peonies Launches Her Own Clothing Line

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Rach Parcell, the pink-loving Nordstrom shopper behind Pink Peonies, officially launched her online store today. She’s apparently selling clothes she designed. But she says it’s not like that time she designed jewelry. According to her comment on instagram that whole fiasco wasn’t really her fault:

…I was in a licensing deal. I was unable to make final decisions on design because I was not the one funding the business. I hired a lawyer to get me out of that contract because I didn’t agree with some of the decisions being made and they told me things that would happen that actually didn’t (like everything being designed by me and not just bought wholesale). It’s much cheaper and less time consuming to buy wholesale, that’s why that decision was made by the people who were funding the brand…

She went on to say she “got out of that contract to create a brand that was my own business and funded by me so at the end of the day, I have the final decision” and accordingly posted gram pics and snaps of herself drawing designs and throwing fabric over dressforms.

The result is mostly a bunch of pink and white dresses and skirts in straightforward, unoriginal shapes perfect for wearing to weddings or Easter church services. Sizes go up to a 10/12 and prices begin at $100. She is evidently already working on her fall line.

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Book Club Internets Lifestyle Blogging

Former That Wife Finds New Outlet For Getting Attention

Jenna, now living absolutely, has discovered Periscope. For those of you who don’t know, Periscope is basically a live webcam/webcasting app where people can use their phone to broadcast whatever they want. A lot of people use it for things like walking around interesting places and talking about what they see, or at events where they describe the scene for people who aren’t there. Others use it to record or broadcast classes for review or home students. Some use it to show off their penises. Jenna of course uses it to sit and talk about herself and how hard life is.

So instead of book club, let’s do a live watch of ‘Testing’, episode 1 of Jenna’s Periscope.

On to the TL;DR…

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Lifestyle Blogging

Pink Peonies Is Pregnant Again Just Like Everyone Has Been Saying For Three Months

Rachel Parcell, the “jewelry designer” and alleged seven figure a year blogger, has announced her fertility issues seem to be over.

This little baby (who already is kicking up a storm) was a BIG surprise!!! It took me a year (and one round of clomid) to get pregnant with Isla Rose so I never would’ve imagined I would get pregnant with my next baby so quickly!

Saying she “only had one period between Isla and this baby” she goes on to share the details of buying and taking a pregnancy test in Italy. No word on whether she has scheduled baby number two’s first jet ski ride.

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Lifestyle Blogging

Brandon Can Blow His Financial Aid Money On A Vacation

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Brandon and his girlfriend Nat, they promise they aren’t rich, are a couple of college kids who both love Nat’s behind and traveling the world. So when Brandon received his financial aid money for school, the choice on how to spend it was obvious – take his girlfriend’s rump on a trip to Thailand.

Hi my name is Brandon and my school just gave me $2,500 in financial aid to spend on textbooks and supplies. And my girlfriend has never left the country before, and I know the one place she’s always wanted to go. And I decided to do something a little different with my financial aid. So this is our itinerary to Thailand, and she doesn’t know it yet, but I’m about to go surprise her. Let’s do it!

They have an instagram account where they document the adventures of Nat’s booty in various locations, and a Facebook page where Brandon explained why it’s ok to use your financial aid money on being “a boss”.

I’ve realized that many people are mislead by the amount of money spent for our trip. The $2500 merely covered our tickets. We spent around $1000 each for a month where we stayed in hostels so we could afford to do the bigger things…I am a film major. I got $2500 after my tuition was paid for. As a film student you luckily don’t need many textbooks. How did I get $2500 in financial aid? I was emancipated when I was 16.

Hopefully his reasoning will calm all the haters who seem angry that some entitled white boy is spending money earmarked for the educational needs of the financially disadvantaged on a tropical vacation for his girlfriend’s tuchas.

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Lifestyle Blogging

That Wife Wants To Live Absolutely

Jenna Cole, ladycoder and expert at selfing, has started yet another internet presence. In a rambling introduction she explains what Living Absolutely is all about.

Living out loud. Jumping in with both feet…Drinking in everything that feeds your Self. Putting your Self first…Experimenting. Trying new things. Trying all the things. Living out your vision board yet being willing to burn the board the next day because you’ve changed your mind and have new dreams to chase after.

So far it seems to mostly be a depository for Jenna’s Toastmaster ‘speeches’. This latest addition to her online existence joins her two new instagram accounts in Jenna’s attempt to carpet bomb the internet with her pink hair.

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Fashion Blogging Lifestyle Blogging

RewardStyle Conference Begins And Not Much Has Changed

It’s time once again for the RewardStyle Con, the event that allows selected style bloggers to feel superior to those who did not make enough money to attend. Everyone is already gramming their brains out, providing behind-the-scenes looks at their totally unique experiences.

We have the Breakfast On A White Bed grams.

And there’s the My Feet By The Pool selfies.

And the Everyone Posing In Front Of The Same Wall pics.

I guess a good brick wall wasn’t available.

Queen Bee Amber spent the week preparing with facials, and was pronounced #inspiring at her keynote speech. The weekend of partying should be enough to motivate her monkeys to keep making money for her matching mother daughter shoes.

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