Mommy Blogging WTF

“That Wife” Is Too Lazy For Baths

uh once a week?

Jenna Cole, caring mother, spent Mother’s Day giving her children their ‘weekly bath’. Yes, just like they did in the days before running water Jenna washes her children only once a week. And how’s that working out?

bath2

You read correctly – her son’s friend at school told him he stank. When commenters pointed out that maybe it’s time to scrub her stinker more often no matter the time of year, Jenna simply told them they need to read a book on the “history of bathing”. Asked why she only washes her kids once a week in the first place, Jenna responded with classic Jenna-ness.

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So basically it has nothing to do with her “academic-lite” position on personal hygiene, and everything to do with her wanting motherhood to be as little work as possible. Such an inspiration for “single” moms everywhere!

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DIY Blogging WTF

“Young House Love” Will Photoshop In Some Safety Gear

Young House Love, here, here, and here, have long been getting called out for their ridiculous use of Photoshop for absurd reasons. Now it seems a GOMI reader found a particularly wtf potential ‘shop – safety gear.

Apparently back in August Sherdawwwwg and The Guy Who Also Does Stuff refinished their deck. (Yeah, I know, I’m already bored too.) Included in the post was a picture of Essbee painting a railing, looking fit and safety conscious:

Stain-5-Sherry-Working-On-Railing2

The problem is, they forgot to delete the original:

Stain-5-Sherry-Working-On-Railing

WOMP WOMP. I’m not sure what the point of this would be, honestly. Why not just grab a mask and take a new pic if your’re that worried about what the YHLoonies will say? They obviously had the masks there for the supplies pic. And since she’s not wearing it in other pics I’m not sure why they even went through the effort for this one pic.

I need answers, people! Why do they keep ‘shopping things for no sensible reason???

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Internets WTF

“American Blogger” Movie Takes Blogging Circle Jerk To New Level

oh shut up

Well it seems that “behold the glory of us” project the Wiegands announced last year is finally finished. “American Blogger” now has a trailer up on vimeo and is apparently “coming soon”.

The trailer claims its “stunning cinematography” will “leave you feeling inspired” by a “movement” that “could change the world”. It then features a bunch of bloggers talking about how awesome blogging is, with the usual such brave, much influential self-back patting. One blogger explains it all by saying ”If we’re keeping it private, why are we experiencing it?”

I’ve said from the start that this entire project just seems like a way for the Wiegands to circle jerk with their blogger friends. This has to be the most self-indulgent tripe that has come out of the blogging world to date, and I don’t understand why it needs to exist or what it offers to the world of cinema. But hey, some hipster got to take a road trip in his Airstream and call himself a filmmaker, and a bunch of bloggers got to rhapsodize about their own importance. Hooray, internets.

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WTF

Hey Natalie Jean Will Kick Off Your Week With Some “WTF Why Would You Say That”

WTF Sunday

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WTF

The Thinking Housewife Thinks The “Blacks” Ruin Neighborhoods

The Thinking Housewife, where white Christian Americans go to vent their spleen about the horrible non-white non-Christian turn America is taking, just posted a charming rant from “Alan”. It seems “Alan” is angry because by golly gee willikers in his day St. Louis was full of white folks, and now those durned “blacks” have come in and ruined it – just like they ruin everything:

The degradation by blacks of what once was a peaceful, civilized neighborhood is a law of nature as predictable as day following night…the reason for that is that blacks will make a jungle out of any town, neighborhood, or city if they are permitted to do so.  I have seen them do this to five neighborhoods in St. Louis where my friends and I lived, played, and roamed at leisure when we were children more than fifty years ago and without ever any concern for our security.

Yes…this guy is complaining that the neighborhood he knew in 1963 has changed. Seriously, are people really complaining that neighborhoods they haven’t even lived in for the past 40 years have changed? OMG, Peepaw, is that you?

Do you think, if we ask nicely, he will write a post about how he’d like to send all cellphones straight to tarnation because they are ruining kids minds with their disgruntled bird games? Maybe he will even hand out Werther’s candies as we sit at his knee!

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

Mormon In Manhattan Noticed The New Baptism Video

OH NO NOT BROWN PEOPLE

Natalie Hill, man getting expert, spent Sunday ugly crying into her pillow over some Mormon women’s conference. But it seems some of those tears were also salty with confusion. Evidently her sister made the previous baptism video clip – but around the 1:30:00 mark, Natalie and her sister noticed something different:

wait wuh

…wuuuuut? Natalie’s other sister chimed in with her feelings as well:

i wut wut

Well, those Hill girls sure are a swell bunch. Such great representatives of the open minded universal love of the Mormon church. Where do I sign up?

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

CheyB Will Tell Single Moms How To Raise A Son

CheyB, “relationship expert”, has already gifted us vaginal citizens with top secret info about men that women “need” to know. Now he is going to help single mothers raise decent man children.

Unfortunately, in many cases, a young male may love his mother to death, but the respect factor isn’t always there simply because you’re a woman. The extent of that respect will be simply because you’re his mother. What he needs is a man who will enforce rules, regulations, standards, requirements and firm consequences for breaking rules.

His advice includes awesome tips like “strategically position him around a man who has power and influence” and finding a man to advise and guide your son because discipline “feels like it’s “nagging”” when it “comes from a woman”.

There you go, single moms of sons – hand your boy over to a man before he turns into a useless hoodlum, because he’s never going to respect a mere woman.

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

XOJane Will Make It Easy For Your Abuser

XOJane, where pageviews are apparently more important than people, just published a post called “It Happened To Me: I Live With My Abuser” that details the author’s story of moving back in with the stepfather who she alleges sexually abused her.

When I graduated high school, my only goal was to move away from him, as far as possible. That only ended up being Mississippi. My time in college was miserable…In 2012, I finally left college and moved from Mississippi back to my family home in Texas, where I am today…My plan was to move home and immediately find a “good-paying” job where I could move out and start my own life. I haven’t been so lucky in finding that job. I currently work part-time as a receptionist, and my life is a mess.

In the post, which also features a picture of the author and intense details of her abuse and resulting depression, the author claims “I know that if, given the opportunity, he would abuse me again” before saying the abuse has never been reported.

Do the XOJane editors not wonder for a moment what would happen to this woman if her stepfather found this post, with her picture and all her allegations? Or do they just not care because pageview$?

Update: XOJane commenters have created a fund to help the author get out of her situation. You can donate here. I wish the best of luck to the author, and if anyone else has any resources to recommend please feel to add them in the comments.

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

“Emphasis Added” Will Not Worry About Her Home

Emily, Olympic level dieter, received some terrible news shortly after her family vacation began.

Woke up to a call from our doorman that a pipe burst. Water has been running for 2 days and flooded our entire home. Floors buckled, ceilings collapsed, closets/furniture/everything ruined.

Of course the family remained on their ski trip and within 24 hours Emily was back to posting duckfaces to instagram.

um ok

On one hand, I don’t know how someone can just shrug their shoulders and say “oh well, let’s drink!” in the wake of total home destruction. On the other hand, at least they aren’t starting a donation drive. It’s certainly a head scratcher.

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Healthy Living Blogging WTF

Healthy Ashley Would Like To Show You Her Placenta

DINNER IS SERVED

Healthy Ashley is apparently not content with simply live-instagramming her birth – she’s now live-instagramming her afterbirth.

Asking the internets whether “wearing an apron” would “make cooking my placenta seem more mainstream”, commenters responded with the usual head pats and talk about placenta smoothies, and CaitlinHTP chimed in to add “I hope all the people disgusted by this don’t eat meat”.

Can someone explain to me why the world needs to see someone cooking an expelled organ? Why is this a thing?

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Mommy Blogging WTF

“Any Mommy Out There” Did Not Swerve

The f**k?

Stacey, “could be any mommy”, shared an amazing story of bravery yesterday. Recounting her weekend “escape” to a cabin with “wonderful girlfriends”, she talked about how sometimes life is about holding your course no matter what. She apparently learned this lesson after running over a dog on the way up to her relaxing getaway:

The dog was just there. One second the headlight beams caught only snowflakes and black tarmac and the next second they outlined a shape my brain recognized with no time to compute or react.  I saw the collar around his neck, I remember that, or I imagine I do, and the simultaneous thoughts: Oh shit, a dog!  And then, DO NOT SWERVE.  I didn’t, which is fortunate, I think, traveling at 45 mph on a narrow, icy road, for the three people in the Suburban, but very, very unfortunate for the poor dog.

Stacey then explained that she left the dog on the road, saying she “couldn’t even call whomever would miss him and then find him dead in the morning because he lay in the middle of the road and given how quickly we bore down on him, I did not feel comfortable having one of us stand in the same place for even a short time”. The next morning, she reveled in child-free coffee:

We drove on and left him there, physically, if not mentally.  The next morning I woke to the sounds of only two other adults in the blissfully child-free cabin – coffee brewing, water running, pages quietly turning.  Is it just me or is it the mornings that are so utterly decadent about taking a short break from life as a mom?

When a shocked commenter remarked that it was “just plain cruel to let the dog lay there dead on the road” Stacey responded:

…I know it must feel good to be so morally superior to the rest of us mere human beings. You know, I bet if you googled it enough, you could find the poor family who lost their pet that night and chastise them for not having their dog properly secured when they live along a road with such a fast speed limit and fairly heavy traffic. They will appreciate your judgment as much as I do!

Stacey soon began commenting that she did feel bad about it, and finally took refuge in the classic You Weren’t There defense. She finally said she celebrated her birthday the next day, and that “it was a sad and happy day with a lot of chocolate cake”.

Seriously, maybe bloggers should just stop posting dog killing stories. Just…stop.

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

Alpha Game Says Coding Is Too Hard For Girls

Alpha Game, a site for all those ‘red pill’ MRA’s, wants to clear up a mystery of the tech world – where are all those women programmers that graduated 10 years ago? Well, they have the answer:

They dropped out because programming demands single-minded focus, mathematical skill, logic, and most of all, individual accountability. They dropped out because they didn’t belong in the field and encouraging them to pursue it was doing them a serious career disservice.

AG then explains why we should stop telling dem uppity wimmins to explore careers in tech:

As a general rule, women don’t like competitive jobs where they are held to an objective standard, particularly when they cannot easily pass off their work to others and still take credit for it.

He adds that even if women get CS degrees, once they get out in the real world of code monkeying they “look at their prospects for competitive success and promptly go in for marketing, human resources, and management”.

This is why Girls Who Code and Black Girls Code will fail, just like every other women-in-technology initiative before it has failed…Throw in the fact that male programmers tend to be competitive and socially graceless, which means that relatively few of them are inclined to do a woman’s job for her in return for the well-practiced flash of a big smile and a few smug coos of appreciation, and it should be no surprise that even intelligent and well-trained women don’t tend to last long in the industry.

Yes, apparently men actually write code, and women just go around smiling and flirting in order to get the nerdy codeb0yz to do their work for them. Seriously, what company is he working at? Because all I’ve experienced is women having to work twice as hard for half the respect. If there’s a place where I can call myself a ‘woman in tech’ while sitting around leveling up in Tetris then please, sign me up. Otherwise this all just sounds like typical male whining about icky girls invading their He-Man Woman Hater’s treehouse.

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Lifestyle Blogging WTF

Vincent Vinturi Says No Means Yes

Vincent Vinturi, ugh, is apparently famous in the world of online alpha males for his advice on how to treat women like dirt. Now he is apparently cutting straight to the chase and telling men to ignore the word “no”:

Women say “no” to me in one way or another on a regular basis, e.g. “no, you can’t have my number”“no, I should go home”“no, I’m not coming into your apartment”, and of course, the classic, “no, we’re not having sex”.

Yet somehow, when it’s all said and done, the woman is invariably happy that I didn’t listen to a single word of protest she uttered; that I barreled through her resistance nonchalantly and drove the ball to the basket. Women RESPECT this sexual insistence even if they aren’t acutely aware of it.

Saying the “consent crowd, however, would like for men to believe that anything short of a written statement, notarized and signed by the soon to be fornicated party, is rape”, ole Vinny goes on to explain how women really do want it, and saying no is just a feminine power play:

It’s in the nature of beautiful women to resist, test, protest, sabotage and make your job of f**king them difficult. And of course, by the time you wrestle their panties off, they’re dripping wet.

Captain Charming then goes on to whine that “[w]ith rape laws the way they are in countries like the US and Canada, it’s downright scary to be a man and act with natural disinhibition in the company of beautiful women”, and advises men to “get out of the Anglosphere so you can relax and get down to business without concern for your freedom”. I assume that’s rapist code for “go to another country with loose laws where you can rape women with impunity” or something.

I am so happy with humanity’s progress, aren’t you, ladies?

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