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Local Milk
July 19, 2014
5:16 pm
avatar
chicken nuggets and

Yeah. I follow her blog to look at the pictures, can't bring myself to read her shit prose though. Who ever thought writing like that was appealing?! Take a goddamn English class. Or don't, maybe English teachers are the ones pushing that sort of style. How about this: read some f**king Hemingway. Or something.

Sadly, I can't snark about much else, since I don't know much about her other than she can't really write. 

But the whole hipster persona makes me puke

July 19, 2014
7:55 pm
avatar
Mad-Lib Recipe Generator
Hamcat
Meows: 93
Snarking Since:
May 28, 2014

I just want to go around to all these hipster bloggers houses and turn on the lights, sweep the dirt of their tables and wash their dishes. I am so over seeing these dimly lit photos ( not dark and moody like some do) but the trying to hard to be hipster dimly lit with rusty vintage dishes and their dirty tables from out foraging for ingredients. Also known as digging in the garden. I have to turn the brightness up on my monitor when I look at their photos since some are so dim. 

August 10, 2014
3:30 pm
avatar
SpaghettiCat
Hamcat
Meows: 59
Snarking Since:
August 8, 2014

I'm really bad about actually *reading* food blogs. For the most part I just visit them for the recipes and photos and skip everything else (with a few exceptions – for example, I always get sucked into the writing on In Jennie's Kitchen). Local Milk might be pretentious but I'm just there for the pretty pictures. I think the photography is gorgeous. The recipes are too complicated for me but I'd definitely eat them if they were offered to me. 

Patience is like bread, I say. I ran out of that yesterday.
August 11, 2014
1:11 am
avatar
its probably lupus
Cat
Meows: 30
Snarking Since:
April 15, 2013

Chick can't write worth a damn, but seems to think she's a hotshot writer. Constantly drops her lit degree, along with these gems:

 

"These days I gravitate more and more towards simplicity. A rustic simplicity that’s clean but not cold, warm but not busy." (uh. thanks. didn't realize there was such a thing as rustic simplicity now?" 

"Sometimes tectonic plates shift in the ether. Sometimes celestial orbs of fire, great, hot and inhospitable, align in deep space. We call them stars. It begins, in this story, on a country rode somewhere outside of Albany, where the honeysuckle that’s already bloomed and fallen in the south still weaves alongside the road. A week later—a week of snap peas in the garden, airports, 1000 photos, rolling pastry crust, the varied terrain of  faces you love, days without sleep, a backyard dinner all Marrakech meets Nashville, and so much work and all of it good—they complete their slow trajectory. The angles are perfect and so perfect. A great softness descends. You give the universe what it’s asked of you for a long time, what you’ve suffered for not giving. And the moment you do it gives you validation. And you know it doesn’t always work this way, and you’re just grateful that just this once it did. It feels like death, the best kind. And then, for a moment that hangs suspended in the air you have electricity, mostly white with shocks of blue, running through your veins instead of slow, warm blood. Your skin shudders and sloughs off. And you experience that delicious faith, amor fati.The pain and frustration and wildflowers all the same—you love them. It can happen somewhere nowhere on I-75 while Dolly sings Jolene. Eternal return."

 

What the hell is she talking about??? Anybody? I can't… even. 

 

Also, does anybody remember that cake post where she introduces the recipe by describing, oh-so-breathlessly, some post-coital moment between her and her fiance? Gross gross gross.

August 11, 2014
9:26 am
avatar
Vertical Running
Hamcat
Meows: 141
Snarking Since:
August 10, 2014

Oh, you mean this cake post???

 

http://localmilkblog.com/2013/04/coconut-tres-leches-cake-1-yr-of-local-milk-a-giveaway.html

 

UGH. 

 

"We were naked, laying the wrong way across the end of the bed in a post-coital tangle. I was huffing him like paint and smiling stupidly."

 

This belongs in a Fifty Shades novel, not a food blog. scared 

August 11, 2014
10:15 am
avatar
blech hockey jesus
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 249
Snarking Since:
July 16, 2012

Whaaaaaat the f**k. MY EYES.

A friend of mine sent me the link to her site last week because she made the cherry clafoutis that Beth had "adapted" from another book. I saw the murderous cherry hands and said OH HELL YES.

August 11, 2014
10:16 am
avatar
chicken nuggets and

Oh my god that post is HILARIOUS. I agree with SpaghettiCat–most blogs I just look at the pictures, and this is one of those. I totally missed out that paint-huffin' thing. smiley-laughing004

Honestly I wish she would just post recipes and photos and not write, in that case her blog would be awesome because personally I don't mind the hipster atmosphere in photographs. I think it's cute, and she's good at it. But the writing, OMG.no-no

December 19, 2014
11:45 pm
avatar
Mad-Lib Recipe Generator
Hamcat
Meows: 93
Snarking Since:
May 28, 2014

ummmmmmm.  I commented that it was a bit much. And she deleted my comment along with any other negative comment that pops up. http://instagram.com/p/w0JcxlAJCi/?modal=true

December 20, 2014
3:35 am
avatar
chicken nuggets and

Pomegranate Baklava Popcorn Crumbles said
ummmmmmm.  I commented that it was a bit much. And she deleted my comment along with any other negative comment that pops up. http://instagram.com/p/w0JcxlAJCi/?modal=true

Oh my god. What the hell made her think that was a good idea? *Art*?

Good for her. Glorifying the slaughter of animals. Wow.

December 20, 2014
9:50 am
avatar
Ol Drippy
Hamcat
Meows: 111
Snarking Since:
November 20, 2014

chicken nuggets and vodka said

Pomegranate Baklava Popcorn Crumbles said
ummmmmmm.  I commented that it was a bit much. And she deleted my comment along with any other negative comment that pops up. http://instagram.com/p/w0JcxlAJCi/?modal=true

Oh my god. What the hell made her think that was a good idea? *Art*?

Good for her. Glorifying the slaughter of animals. Wow.

Gross. That is the most self-indulgent piece of crap. Why does she have to be naked and covered in blood? She says she is trying to draw a parallel between animal flesh and human flesh, but this does not achieve that.

Also, she is serving that meat to people? Who wants to eat something that their host has been handling naked?

And finally, she is clearly deleting comments left and right. There is no way a picture like that would only have positive responses. And she is leaving up her responses to comments she deleted? Weird. The comment about "humanely butchered meat" will give me eyerolls for days rolleyes

Whew, that felt good to get off of my (fully clothed) chest!

December 20, 2014
11:47 am
avatar
Mad-Lib Recipe Generator
Hamcat
Meows: 93
Snarking Since:
May 28, 2014

Ol Drippy said

chicken nuggets and vodka said

Pomegranate Baklava Popcorn Crumbles said
ummmmmmm.  I commented that it was a bit much. And she deleted my comment along with any other negative comment that pops up. http://instagram.com/p/w0JcxlAJCi/?modal=true

Oh my god. What the hell made her think that was a good idea? *Art*?

Good for her. Glorifying the slaughter of animals. Wow.

Gross. That is the most self-indulgent piece of crap. Why does she have to be naked and covered in blood? She says she is trying to draw a parallel between animal flesh and human flesh, but this does not achieve that.

Also, she is serving that meat to people? Who wants to eat something that their host has been handling naked?

And finally, she is clearly deleting comments left and right. There is no way a picture like that would only have positive responses. And she is leaving up her responses to comments she deleted? Weird. The comment about "humanely butchered meat" will give me eyerolls for days rolleyes

Whew, that felt good to get off of my (fully clothed) chest!

Right?? I was like WHY is she naked?? She was deleting a ton of negative comments last night. This am it looks like she is trying to justify why she did this. I don't get why so many people Loooooove her. She is so weird and her pics are all so dimly lit – I just don't get that style. 

December 20, 2014
5:53 pm
avatar
Ol Drippy
Hamcat
Meows: 111
Snarking Since:
November 20, 2014

Pomegranate Baklava Popcorn Crumbles said

Ol Drippy said

chicken nuggets and vodka said

Pomegranate Baklava Popcorn Crumbles said
ummmmmmm.  I commented that it was a bit much. And she deleted my comment along with any other negative comment that pops up. http://instagram.com/p/w0JcxlAJCi/?modal=true

Oh my god. What the hell made her think that was a good idea? *Art*?

Good for her. Glorifying the slaughter of animals. Wow.

Gross. That is the most self-indulgent piece of crap. Why does she have to be naked and covered in blood? She says she is trying to draw a parallel between animal flesh and human flesh, but this does not achieve that.

Also, she is serving that meat to people? Who wants to eat something that their host has been handling naked?

And finally, she is clearly deleting comments left and right. There is no way a picture like that would only have positive responses. And she is leaving up her responses to comments she deleted? Weird. The comment about "humanely butchered meat" will give me eyerolls for days rolleyes

Whew, that felt good to get off of my (fully clothed) chest!

Right?? I was like WHY is she naked?? She was deleting a ton of negative comments last night. This am it looks like she is trying to justify why she did this. I don't get why so many people Loooooove her. She is so weird and her pics are all so dimly lit – I just don't get that style. 

I really wanted to like her. I think it was the whole recovering addict thing that made her seem more real maybe? I like to support people trying to get back on their feet after stuff like that. But I've actually never been motivated to make one of her recipes and I finally decided to stop following her after that picture. And this one:

http://instagram.com/p/w1lZMDAJFs/

More "art" rolleyes

And this is why you don't do drugs, kids.

December 20, 2014
8:48 pm
avatar
chicken nuggets and

Ol Drippy said

 

I really wanted to like her. I think it was the whole recovering addict thing that made her seem more real maybe? I like to support people trying to get back on their feet after stuff like that. But I've actually never been motivated to make one of her recipes and I finally decided to stop following her after that picture. And this one:

http://instagram.com/p/w1lZMDAJFs/

More "art" rolleyes

And this is why you don't do drugs, kids.

Your mentioning that inspired me to do some searching on her blog for posts about addiction, etc. It seems odd, almost. You have the superficial hipstery cool girl persona, and then you have some really emotional story about her struggles. Almost doesn't fit. 

Though I will say it didn't make her writing any less insufferable. 



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