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Local Milk - I think she has Mad Cow disease
August 24, 2015
7:28 pm
avatar
SnarkaliciousPork
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1389
Snarking Since:
July 1, 2015

http://localmilkblog.com/about

 

Good lord, this one is nuts. This little gem is in her "About" Section: 

One morning you wake up, look in the mirror, and see that the river and mountains and murder ballads are in you. They are you. You’re
them.

Murder ballads? Is this a food blog or an ode to Charles Manson? 

Yeah, I'm into fitness. Fit'n this in ma mouth!
August 25, 2015
1:13 am
avatar
CrueltyFreeSnark
Hamcat
Meows: 76
Snarking Since:
July 17, 2015

Hmm. It would appear that she does indeed have diagnosed psychiatric issues: http://journal.esmewang.com/beth-kirby-owg/

Those pictures, though! Such filter. So rustic. Wow

August 25, 2015
9:04 am
avatar
xx
Senior Hamcat
Meows: 781
Snarking Since:
June 3, 2015

I think there's another Local Milk thread around here somewhere, but I don't remember.

Anyway, any time she comes up I have to say how much I hate her. She's probably my most hated blogger out there. She's the worst. Her writing is strangulated and purple. Her recipes have 50,000 ingredients. She has this weird thing with sorghum syrup, which is disgusting. She has built her brand on being OMGsosouthern but is actually super unrelatable to actual people in the actual South. Her photography is atrocious. She has contributed to the Kinfolkization of food photography and food blogs, which I find unexcusable. Truly the worst.

August 25, 2015
9:29 am
avatar
CrueltyFreeSnark
Hamcat
Meows: 76
Snarking Since:
July 17, 2015

Aunt Cornelia, badass meowed
I think there's another Local Milk thread around here somewhere, but I don't remember.

 

Yup. I found this, in lifestyle bloggers: 

http://gomiblog.com/forums/lifestyle-bloggers/local-milk-1/

Is she lifestyle? Food? A slow documented and photoshopped descent into madness? 

Her colour palette and bleak minimalism is meshing with my southern hemisphere SAD and filling me with a desperate understanding of the hopeless, beautiful, futility of existence, the existentialist yearning for – nah, just kidding. I think she's just a self absorbed right pretentious prat searching for a way to get out of looking for and holding down a real job. So, pretty normal for a food/lifestyle blogger then. 

(Seriously though, that photography makes me want to move to Russia, find a barn and stage Chekhov revivals attended by tiny audiences of sad lonely long haired college kids on gap years who have feels)

August 25, 2015
12:08 pm
avatar
SnarkaliciousPork
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1389
Snarking Since:
July 1, 2015

Yeah, she's taking the whole "Southern Gothic" thing a bit too far. Granted, she may be dealing with some mental health issues. I don't fault her for that AT ALL. But that writing:

My work & recipes are inspired by the perfection of imperfection, the sacred in the mundane, and living in the present…

She lists her type, favorite stones and spirit animal in her about section. Really? Just show me some tasty grub, talk a bit about your hamcat and be done with it. 

Yeah, I'm into fitness. Fit'n this in ma mouth!
August 25, 2015
12:12 pm
avatar
SnarkaliciousPork
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1389
Snarking Since:
July 1, 2015

Look who has the creepiest Instagram feed ever??

https://instagram.com/p/6yE3x7gJLJ/

Yeah, I'm into fitness. Fit'n this in ma mouth!
August 25, 2015
12:29 pm
avatar
Mary Anne Spier
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1476
Snarking Since:
June 19, 2013

Aunt Cornelia, badass meowed
I think there's another Local Milk thread around here somewhere, but I don't remember.

Anyway, any time she comes up I have to say how much I hate her. She's probably my most hated blogger out there. She's the worst. Her writing is strangulated and purple. Her recipes have 50,000 ingredients. She has this weird thing with sorghum syrup, which is disgusting. She has built her brand on being OMGsosouthern but is actually super unrelatable to actual people in the actual South. Her photography is atrocious. She has contributed to the Kinfolkization of food photography and food blogs, which I find unexcusable. Truly the worst.

 

Omg, love your user name!

August 25, 2015
12:51 pm
avatar
SnarkaliciousPork
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1389
Snarking Since:
July 1, 2015

CrueltyFreeSnark meowed

Aunt Cornelia, badass meowed
I think there's another Local Milk thread around here somewhere, but I don't remember.

 

Yup. I found this, in lifestyle bloggers: 

http://gomiblog.com/forums/lifestyle-bloggers/local-milk-1/

Is she lifestyle? Food? A slow documented and photoshopped descent into madness? 

Her colour palette and bleak minimalism is meshing with my southern hemisphere SAD and filling me with a desperate understanding of the hopeless, beautiful, futility of existence, the existentialist yearning for – nah, just kidding. I think she's just a self absorbed right pretentious prat searching for a way to get out of looking for and holding down a real job. So, pretty normal for a food/lifestyle blogger then. 

(Seriously though, that photography makes me want to move to Russia, find a barn and stage Chekhov revivals attended by tiny audiences of sad lonely long haired college kids on gap years who have feels)

Chekhov revivals!! That's the best. I'm kind of bummed that she already has her own thread. I felt like that was my little discovery. I should've known that someone this batshit crazy would already be a GOMI for pretty much – oh, I don't know – EVERYONE.bandwagon

Yeah, I'm into fitness. Fit'n this in ma mouth!
August 26, 2015
12:21 am
avatar
Cereal Noper
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 270
Snarking Since:
January 11, 2012

Let's all join her for a #sponsored "Honest Moment" where she keeps it real and talks about burning her toast for breakfast, paired with the most agonizingly styled and try hard-iest photo of burnt toast the world has ever seen. Totes honest, y'all.

https://instagram.com/p/60UqsjAJM2/?taken-by=local_milk

Like, there's a broom…on the table…or is the toast + tea on the floor? And there's a whisk, for whisking…what exactly?

August 26, 2015
9:18 am
avatar
xx
Senior Hamcat
Meows: 781
Snarking Since:
June 3, 2015

SnarkaliciousPork meowed

snip

Chekhov revivals!! That's the best. I'm kind of bummed that she already has her own thread. I felt like that was my little discovery. I should've known that someone this batshit crazy would already be a GOMI for pretty much – oh, I don't know – EVERYONE.bandwagon

No one seemed to comment on her other thread. I guess she's just such a good combination of incredibly boring and incredibly annoying that everyone avoids even hate-reading her. I know I do.

August 26, 2015
12:21 pm
avatar
SnarkaliciousPork
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1389
Snarking Since:
July 1, 2015

Cereal Noper meowed
Let's all join her for a #sponsored "Honest Moment" where she keeps it real and talks about burning her toast for breakfast, paired with the most agonizingly styled and try hard-iest photo of burnt toast the world has ever seen. Totes honest, y'all.

https://instagram.com/p/60UqsjAJM2/?taken-by=local_milk

Like, there's a broom…on the table…or is the toast + tea on the floor? And there's a whisk, for whisking…what exactly?

You mean, your breakfast table doesn't contain a random broom and a rusty knife? I thought they were mandatory.

Who am I kidding? That photo is just sad. If Honest tea is trying to reach out to the "I live alone with 50 cats and voodoo dolls of my ex" demographic, they nailed it when they went with Beth. 

Yeah, I'm into fitness. Fit'n this in ma mouth!
August 26, 2015
9:43 pm
avatar
nonamesplease
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1053
Snarking Since:
September 21, 2013

I don't think I have ever managed to read a post of hers all the way through.  The writing is just SO over-the-top and painful.  I really couldn't say if the recipes are any good because by the time I give up on a post and scroll down, I've just lost interest in whatever item it is that the recipe purports to make.

 

I used to have a (totally amateur) cooking/food blog. I know i have a tendency to rabbit on, so whenever I wrote a post, I would draft it, let it sit for a while, and then go through and cut out about half the text.  The post ALWAYS read much better afterwards, even if it wasn't a literary masterpiece.  I wish a few more food bloggers would follow my lead wink

August 26, 2015
9:55 pm
avatar
Rich Loser with Teet

Cereal Noper meowed

Let's all join her for a #sponsored "Honest Moment" where she keeps it real and talks about burning her toast for breakfast, paired with the most agonizingly styled and try hard-iest photo of burnt toast the world has ever seen. Totes honest, y'all.
https://instagram.com/p/60UqsjAJM2/?taken-by=local_milk
Like, there's a broom…on the table…or is the toast + tea on the floor? And there's a whisk, for whisking…what exactly?

Is it me or is that bottle of shill tea 'shopped in to the picture?



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