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Operation Skinny Jeans
July 14, 2014
5:58 pm
avatar
Skinny Dorito Taco Bake
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1204
Snarking Since:
October 18, 2013

This chick was brought up in the "Lesser Known Bloggers Who Annoy You" thread under lifestyle blogs but I think she needs her own thread here. It seems like she started off nice enough and lost a good amount of weight. Then she became a Beachbody coach. Now she fakes progress pictures and just seems so freaking fake. 

Exhibit A:

These are supposed to be progress photos from a 3-Day Refresh that she's shilling. So obviously sticking it out in one photo and sucking it in in the other. She even looks taller on the right because she's standing up talller and sucking in for dear life. In another photo from the same post, you can see that pink thing on the floor is in both pictures, supposedly taken on different days. Someone called her out on it on FB and she replied that those are her underwear. uh

She used to work and posted almost daily photos/videos of herself doing her Beachbody workout in her office. Apparently she was laid off a few months ago (surprise!) and now she's a full-time coach.

Exhibit B:

She and her blogger friend do "fashion shoots" that are just a mess. From their carnival "photo shoot":

IMG_6255_1

She's always pigeon toed, playing with her hair, etc. And her friend – those jeggings. I can't.

Her photo today finally pushed me over the edge. This is supposedly her before & after of reading a blog post about herself

 

[Image Can Not Be Found]

So she was just taking a selfie, then paused before she posted it to read her friend's blog, started crying, took another selfie, and then posted the before & after? She's just making up nonsense for attention.

BRING IT DONT SING IT I know whos dick was in me whenmy kidswas conceived
July 14, 2014
6:15 pm
avatar
#bubbagrind
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 308
Snarking Since:
July 2, 2013

OMG! Thank you so much for starting this topic! Snarking on Jess is one of my most treasured guilty pleasures because she puts out a truly impressive output of WTF-ness that never fails to deliver. 

Her faked 3-day progress pictures were incredible. No one with a brain could possibly think they're legit, right?

And I too love her friday photo shoots. It's not that she necessarily looks bad, per se, but the poses are SO embarrassing. I'm really glad that she has so much self-confidence, but I wish she would put less effort into taking progress pictures and more into actually *making* progress. 

I can't wait to see how she does in the half-marathon that she has literally NOT trained for! Should be good. popcorn

July 14, 2014
6:42 pm
avatar
Skinny Dorito Taco Bake
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1204
Snarking Since:
October 18, 2013

Thigh Gap said
OMG! Thank you so much for starting this topic! Snarking on Jess is one of my most treasured guilty pleasures because she puts out a truly impressive output of WTF-ness that never fails to deliver. 

Her faked 3-day progress pictures were incredible. No one with a brain could possibly think they're legit, right?

And I too love her friday photo shoots. It's not that she necessarily looks bad, per se, but the poses are SO embarrassing. I'm really glad that she has so much self-confidence, but I wish she would put less effort into taking progress pictures and more into actually *making* progress. 

I can't wait to see how she does in the half-marathon that she has literally NOT trained for! Should be good. popcorn

She's running a half marathon?!?!?!? I rarely read her blog unless something she posts on IG piques my morbid curiosity. 

I swear this girl is a wanna be Mama Laughlin:

Fake progress pics? Check.
Losing job probably because she spends more time taking selfies than working? Check.
Shilling MLM products? Check.
Running a half marathon totally unprepared and end up walking a chunk of it? TBD

BRING IT DONT SING IT I know whos dick was in me whenmy kidswas conceived
July 14, 2014
8:00 pm
avatar
perky postpartum vag
Senior Hamcat
Meows: 831
Snarking Since:
March 21, 2014

Why?

July 14, 2014
8:10 pm
avatar
JAF
Senior Hamcat
Meows: 517
Snarking Since:
October 1, 2011

She looks horrible. Why in the world is she taking pictures of her gluttony puke

I think this is the first time I've ever felt pity for fabric. Those poor jeans.

July 14, 2014
8:29 pm
avatar
smellycats
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 245
Snarking Since:
September 25, 2013

Skinny Dorito Taco Bake said 

 

All I see is the zombie woman in the background. In the full size version of this pic, you can't see that she's reaching for her child, and so I assumed, reachin' for brains, obv.

I haven't read this blog. Is she a weight loss blog? A fitness blog? Having had an ed, I'm all for body positivity and loving your body. There's nothing wrong with taking fashion shots of yourself and showing off how good you look in your outfits, no matter what size you are. I'm still working on it, so more power to her for that.

It's definitely possible to be overweight and be fit, and even to run a half or full marathon. You do still have to train for it, though!

July 14, 2014
8:34 pm
avatar
Queen Bey
Feline Porklord
Meows: 2032
Snarking Since:
March 7, 2014

OMG I'm so excited to start reading and snarking. Thank you, Skinny Dorito Taco Bake. Thank you.

Now teaching Instagram posing classes. Learn how to pose yourself up to 3 dress sizes smaller!!
July 14, 2014
9:38 pm
avatar
SirSnarksaLot
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 332
Snarking Since:
June 26, 2014

Guys, be sure to check out the last few pages of Lesser Known Lifestyle Bloggers to catch up on the snark on this one!

I'm not one to snark on someone's weight, but I stand by my claim that I wouldn't buy a book on how to become rich and successful that was written by a homeless dude, so I SURE as hell wouldn't buy Beach Body products or take weight loss advice from OSJ.

Also, Mizuno gave her free shoes to review? Why, Mizuno, why would you pick HER to sponsor?!?!

July 14, 2014
9:40 pm
avatar
SirSnarksaLot
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 332
Snarking Since:
June 26, 2014

Oh yeah, today's "before and after" selfie. Riiiiight, like that wasn't staged. Not picture: the onion she assaulted her eyes with to make herself appear to cry.

July 14, 2014
10:14 pm
avatar
Megs neglected oil change
Feline Porklord
Meows: 1161
Snarking Since:
June 3, 2014

Skinny Dorito Taco Bake said

This chick was brought up in the "Lesser Known Bloggers Who Annoy You" thread under lifestyle blogs but I think she needs her own thread here. It seems like she started off nice enough and lost a good amount of weight. Then she became a Beachbody coach. Now she fakes progress pictures and just seems so freaking fake. 

Exhibit A:

These are supposed to be progress photos from a 3-Day Refresh that she's shilling. So obviously sticking it out in one photo and sucking it in in the other. She even looks taller on the right because she's standing up talller and sucking in for dear life. In another photo from the same post, you can see that pink thing on the floor is in both pictures, supposedly taken on different days. Someone called her out on it on FB and she replied that those are her underwear. uh

She used to work and posted almost daily photos/videos of herself doing her Beachbody workout in her office. Apparently she was laid off a few months ago (surprise!) and now she's a full-time coach.

Exhibit B:

She and her blogger friend do "fashion shoots" that are just a mess. From their carnival "photo shoot":

IMG_6255_1

She's always pigeon toed, playing with her hair, etc. And her friend – those jeggings. I can't.

Her photo today finally pushed me over the edge. This is supposedly her before & after of reading a blog post about herself

 

[Image Can Not Be Found]

So she was just taking a selfie, then paused before she posted it to read her friend's blog, started crying, took another selfie, and then posted the before & after? She's just making up nonsense for attention.

Those jeggings scared

July 14, 2014
10:27 pm
avatar
SirSnarksaLot
Expert Hamcat
Meows: 332
Snarking Since:
June 26, 2014

I would love (LOVE!!!) to see the thought bubbles above the heads of all the other people at that carnival!!

July 14, 2014
10:37 pm
avatar
Miss Hamerica
Senior Hamcat
Meows: 744
Snarking Since:
November 26, 2011

Oh man, so many feels about this chick. When I first started reading her she seemed sweet and relatable. She's a little too try hard for me now. It all started with the constant "workout videos" in her office and now that she's quit working to be a BeachBody coach? Not enough side eye in the world for that. (Truly nothing to do with her weight. I just judge the shit out of anyone who shills BeachBody).

As for the half marathon, she's already pushed it back once and changed it to an easier course. I really don't see an issue in that, especially if you realize you got in over your head and don't have time to properly train. But now she's continued to not train. She recently posted a MapMyRun course that said she walked 1.8 miles because there were too many bikes out to run? Um, ok. I also just have issues with these bloggers who have no sense of personal safety. By looking at her IG it seems like she "runs" a really similar loop every time. I don't live far from her and I pretty much know her exact route now. That does not seem smart to me.

The crying selfie put me over the edge today too. I've been contemplating starting a thread on her for a few days but so lazy, so 9 months pregnant, so thanks SDTB!

July 14, 2014
10:40 pm
avatar
hellowonderland

Catnip Everdeen said

Why?

I actually really like that bathing suit.



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