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Gala Darling Will Teach You To Cure Yourself

Gala Darling, boob job feminist, has announced her latest woo filled moneymaking scheme. She will now charge you lucky people $145 for a class on “Emotional Freedom Technique”. Her sales pitch is pretty strong:

I discovered tapping in 2006 and the first thing I used it for was to clear myself of the daily asthma attacks I’d been experiencing since I was 10 years old…I tapped to dismantle the depression that had plagued me since the age of 13, and then — in one night — tapped to stop my eating disorder in its tracks.

Her system is a “combination of written and video content which shows you the basics of tapping”, and she says it will also have “a bundle of scripts” to help you “heal” specific issues.

If $145 sounds like a lot to cure your asthma and depression, you can pre-order it right now for $95 and then wait until it’s released in mid-April. I’m tempted to purchase it just to see what kind of 50 page not-promising-anything disclaimer she includes. I mean, people can’t possibly really expect to cure extremely serious medical and mental health issues by tapping their wrists…right?

  1. Little Broom On The Prairie

    This works just fine. And it's free. Don't need your tapping lessons, G! Nic is here.


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    • my muffin top is all that

      This is everything.

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  2. From a purely capitalist perspective, if I can get literally hours of Youtube footage of tapping instructional videos for free, why would I pay $95+ for the exact same thing I could get in .0002987 seconds on Google?

    Hell, the guy who first made this whole thing up, Gary Craig, is still alive and practicing, why would I spend nearly a hundred bucks on some Gala-come-lately when I could plonk down hard earned money for the OG?

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    • Vagine

      But does Gary Craig wear animal ears and preach that indulging your own every whim as being "radical self love"? Also, pink and glitter and feminist boob jobs!

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    • The Crystallized Tears of Mrs. Butterworth

      Thank you. I was just coming to say the same thing. I had a coworker that was really into tapping for her anxiety, but she learned about it from YouTube. Why spend $145 for videos and written content when you can access 282,000 videos (according to YouTube search) for free? If you want written content, Amazon has a bunch of books available for less than $15 each. Bet you can probably get a couple from your local library, if you were industrious.

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  3. healthiness journey

    I don't have an issue with EFT or tapping, but why would I want to learn from Gala? Is she some kind of EFT expert now?

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    • Dorothy Zbornak

      I have all kinds of issues with both, outrageous fee or not. Promoting EFT as a substitute for legit medical care is reckless.

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  4. Hummingbird on speed with ADD

    When I read "tapping", I thought she was talking about tap dancing and couldn't figure out how that cured asthma.

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    • Lewis Vuitton

      Same. I was confused for a minute!

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    • AreYouSerious

      Yes!! I was like I do not think my doctor would approve of such behavior at all!

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    • postit

      Me too!

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    • Miss.Lemon

      same lol, never heard of this.

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  5. Dreamscape of Femininity

    Is tapping the new magnetic bracelet? I've never heard of this quackery before.

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    • Big Mouth Kerfy Bass

      Tapping, fapping, crystals, homeopathy, faith healing, dried unicorn droppings, coffee enemas, refusing to vaccinate your children - it's all quackery. Quack quack.

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      • The Disagreement Banana Exists For A Reason

        I dunno man, fapping *did* cure my horniness...

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        • Big Mouth Kerfy Bass

          Okay, maybe I shouldn't have included fapping. It's just that it 1. rhymes with tapping and 2. is just as useful at curing serious medical conditions as various forms of quackbullshit are.

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  6. KipDynamite

    Legit thought she was talking about tap dancing and my eyes bugged at it curing her attacks.

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  7. random commenter

    I work in the disability community and some chronically ill/medically fragile. It's really sad how vulnerable some of them are. But they are, so that's how quacks like this exist.

    In other news, I'm tapping my wrists right now and my allergies are still bothering me, so there really must be a certain way to do it.

    Taking advantage of her vulnerable readers, she's an asshole.

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    • Cold Comfort Farm

      This. Quackery that take advantage of the truly ill is awful enough, but it is freaking rampant in the special needs community and those people have a special place in hell. It's great if tapping helps some people, but it's no substitute for good medical care. I'm so over randos trying to BS their way into health care. I am surrounded by pretty people shilling essential oils- because they cure Zika and Ebola, dontchaknow.

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  8. potatohead

    Tapping? Like . . . dat ass? I don't understand the words she is using.

    (Tapping dat ass has helped me clear depression before, just FYI. I'll give away this information for free!)

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    • NOPE

      Literally snot-laughed so thanks for that.

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  9. Andrea

    When I read this the first thing I though of was Scientology and that auditing thing they do that is supposed to purge you of all of your negative emotions/memories/whatever which are responsible for all that ails you. So basically, Gala is starting her own Tapping cult?

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    • FortDa

      I think we have 2 scientologists in the house! (Who else would nope this?)

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  10. what the fuckever

    So, Gala is planning on being the next L Ron Hubbard?

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  11. Amaryllis

    What a f**king awful person, taking advantage of the chronically ill and credulous, or just desperate.

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  12. my muffin top is all that

    Ok, gird your loins for a partially unpopular opinion:

    I know people who do this. They use it specifically to augment their therapy and for monkey mind type things: anxiety, negative thought patterns, depressive precursors, etc. They are not schizophrenics or anyone that CBT alone probably won't help. What it does for them, from what I can see, is more of a grounding exercise to break the negative thought patterns that they have. They say it works. For me, it is not something that works though it seems like it could be like any other type of coping strategy (take a shower, meditate, journal, go for a walk, make something,etc etc) that can help you get out of whatever immediate mental trap you are in. This is of course discounting the whole body meridian thing which acupuncture also focuses on and isnt my cup of tea. My point is, this COULD be helpful for SOME things. Not effing asthma.

    I also don't see how Gala is in any way, shape, or form qualified to teach anyone ANYTHING and if she's not also encouraging some therapy with a TRAINED therapist to deal with the underlying issues she's failing big time. She also can't act like this type of tool is a magic elixir to just fix everything under the sun. It's not. EFT will not cure cancer or diarrhea or serious mental health issues. It could work as a short term coping mechanism even if it's for the placebo effect alone.

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    • Amaryllis

      Literally anything could do what you describe, which is fine, but I just watched a grown man cry as he described taking his dying daughter to inpatient ED treatment, so this f**king b***h saying she cured her ED with tapping INSTANTLY needs to STFU and STFD.

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      • my muffin top is all that

        Well the point of all of it is that healing things is a process and you have to find what works for you and sometimes they are weird. She's being completely disingenuous though with both the asthma, which tapping would have no affect on unless they were somehow only stress induced, or the ED saying that it's an instant cure. She's still a terrible person.

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    • Matching Adult Sized Care Bear Undies

      I thought the same thing. I had never heard of tapping before, but I can imagine how in certain emotional situations it might help me cope. Sort of like how they tell you to squeeze the skin between your thumb and forefinger. But that’s more of an emotional/calming thing, not a way to actually cure actual medical conditions!

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  13. Titmerchant

    This is the worst. I used to work for a lady who was big on holistic alternatives to western medicine (she once had a tooth infection and stuffed an entire clove of garlic up into the cavity - and spent the entire morning breathing the most pungent garlicky breath down my neck).

    She was an EFT practitioner (outside of the business she ran, I had no association with that malarkey) - I got the impression it was a poor-man's hypnotherapy, she used it for weight loss, grief, phobias, to quit smoking, etc.

    One day she told me my depression was probably caused by the inhalers I used for my asthma and I noped the f**k outta there. I'd had enough of her trying to heal me with tapping and crystals and garlic cloves and raw food diets. I have absolutely no problem with people trying that stuff on themselves, but leave me the hell out of it.

    Gala's smart - she's preying on desperate people who have been let down by conventional medicine or for whatever reason don't trust it, and will give money to the happy, shiny lady with the cure. She's a snake oil salesman dressed up in glitter.

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