Food Blogging

White Cookbook Lady Will Make Deaths Of Black People About Her

Shauna Ahern, did you know she adopted a black kid, adopted a black kid. She knows all about the horror and heartbreak of the Alton Sterling family, and of all families who endure racism and possible violence, because she adopted a black son.

This is my beautiful 2-year-old son…in 10 to 15 years, he’s going to be enormously tall and strong. His black body will be a threat to someone…he could be killed for driving black.

She can tell us all how to fix racism because she adopted a black kid. Did you know she adopted a black kid? She did.

She explains that nothing will change in America until white people fix it.

There is a wound at the heart of this nation…And it’s going to take white people doing something, so many of us shouting, before anything changes. Rise up, people. Rise up.

White people like Shauna, who knows all about racism and how to fix it because she adopted a black kid.

  1. Mazel Tov Cocktail

    Technically, she bought a black kid... then moved him to an island surrounded by water and white people.

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    • Which makes all her garment rending about healing the wounds of slavery all the more offensive.

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    • Albie Quirky

      I generally really gnash my teeth in rage when people refer to private adoption as "buying children."

      But I cannot believe these dreadful, careless, slovenly, grifty, unwarrantedly arrogant jerks passed a home study conducted by a competent, caring agency, so you might as well be right in this case.

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      • meaculpa

        It was a private adoption.

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      • Suicidal Footman in the Attic

        They did try the "competent, caring agency" route but she was caught out posting nasty, derogatory, identifying comments about the birth mother of one of the "damaged" (her words) babies they declined. IIRC they also turned one down because it interfered with a trip to Italy or somewhere.

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        • Suzy Bishop-Shakusky

          Holy crap!
          What a vile woman.

          So in a private adoption no one is looking out for the well being of the child?

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        • Gives me the Shrivels

          Holy shit really?! I don't read this train wreck but holy f.

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          • boombalatty

            She's Cecily's gluten-free doppelganger. Well worth the hate read.

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  2. Suzy Bishop-Shakusky

    She was always an ally! Now she's family!
    (These are her own damn words)

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    • Sliding Down My Horfhole


      Never forget!

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  3. castaway

    I also like how she assumes her 2 year old will be a tall, strong, threatening teenager.

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    • Because black.

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      • champagne landscape

        My thought exactly. He might actually be kinda scrawny and want to play the flute. Age 2 is a little early to start proclaiming how someone will turn out.

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        • Not Sponsored by Target

          One of my children is a concert violinist, in the 10%tile for weight, and then 30%tile for height.

          He intimidates no one.

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  4. Suicidal Footman in the Attic

    Good old Shauna. Nice to know that you can always count on her to be a hypocrite.

    22 hours ago on Instagram
    "Look, I know damn well that the protocols of Instagram and social media suggest that I should stay silent on this and show you the pretty pictures of the cowboy cookies recipe I posted last night. Got to build the brand! Don't offend or say anything real!Screw the pretty, pretty pictures that keep us bland and silent.
    I don't want to hear about your latest food blog recipe today. I don't want to read about silly, flippant things. "

    The she "builds the brand" with a handy link to her cookie recipe:

    15 hours ago on Facebook
    "The world feels a little hard today. These gluten-free, dairy-free cowboy cookies might help. ‪#‎glutenfree‬ ‪#‎dairyfree‬"

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    • what_is_written

      ... wow.

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    • Suicidal Footman in the Attic

      It's OK when Shauna does it but she can't understand it when Ruth Reichl does it.

      Carol Blymire ‏@CarolBlymire 1h1 hour ago
      Retweeted ruthreichl
      You cannot be serious. What the hell is wrong with you, Ruth?

      ruthreichl @ruthreichl
      Mist drifting gently away. Mournful doves sing their lament. Black beans, white rice, splash of tabasco. Pray for our country.

      Shauna James Ahern ‏@glutenfreegirl 1h1 hour ago
      @CarolBlymire it's hard to understand.

      Carol Blymire ‏@CarolBlymire 1h1 hour ago
      @glutenfreegirl Not that hard to understand. It's narcissistic and navel-gazing. And just plain wrong.

      Shauna James
      @CarolBlymire I meant it's hard to understand how she thought that was the right response. Dash of Tabasco. Please.

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      • Palate of a Starved Goat

        I'm pretty sure this is a classic Shauna backpedal...because when Beyonce dropped her visual album a few months ago, Shauna was all about appropriating hot sauce. She's so socially tone-deaf.

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    • glutenfreeloader

      well and then her IG the next day was pie, and then today it was BBQ from a BLACK-OWNED BBQ place...because that's relevant to how delicious it is of course. She sickens me.

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    • glutenfreeloader

      Someone actually commented on her post the next day of a pie totally calling her out for being a hypocrite and it was AWESOME. Waiting for it to be deleted, but luckily someone copied it to the thread!

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  5. Cat Benetar

    God, I am so sick of mommy bloggers and IG'ers, and everyone on Facebook saying shit like, "Rise Up." OK- Rise up........ AND DO WHAT?! She complains about other people on social media showing pictures of recipes...and yet all she does is upload a picture of her child. What's that supposed to do? Take some real action. Locate the contact information for your mayor, city council, or state rep and post that for your followers to use. Link to your city's police conduct review process, so people can educate themselves. Stop telling other people to "Rise Up," when you aren't even doing it yourself. BE the action.

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    • Suicidal Footman in the Attic

      The only thing dear Shauna will rise up for is comped meals. Did you know that the act of comping a meal to Shauna magically erases all traces of gluten. Really, she can eat ANYTHING, if it's comped. It's a medical mystery miracle.

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    • The Missus

      But she lives on a rural island surrounded by water---her words--with a population of 10,000, less than 1% of whom are black. So it's up to everyone else to actually do something because I guess there's nothing to do about it on Vashon, the most liberal place in America (something she's pointed to in the past with pride, without actually doing a little research and finding out that that has been debunked).

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      • Suicidal Footman in the Attic

        Hey, but she's doing something by publicly nagging Ashley Forde (iSmashFizzle) to move to lily-white Vashon, which Ashley is probably seriously considering because she once ate a slice of pie at a party Shauna cooked for and now they are "family."

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        • RollsRoyceRevenge

          Given the amount of bodily fluids I imagine flow into Shauna's "food" simply from her cooking it, Ashley may indeed share a biological link at this point.

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  6. a dollop of thlack-jawed

    LOLZ, our pompous writerly writer won't be amused about the term" cookbook lady".

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    • Albie Quirky

      She's not even a good cookbook lady, because most of her recipes don't f**king work.

      She brings the same brilliance to her understanding of race in America.


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      • Hot sauce, people. Hot sauce.


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        • glutenfreeloader

          HA! Hamiltone-deaf almost made me spit out my water! LOLZ

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  7. hashtagdeep

    Another b***h going for the gold in the Whitesplain Olympics.

    And wow, folks! It looks like the blatant use of White Savior steroids may give her the edge she needs to do it. Can't wait for the victory speech.

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    • Slaggy Whores Are Pretty Smart

      oh, my stars. "going for the gold in the Whitesplain Olympics" is the best, and I hope to use it liberally this week

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  8. Not Sponsored by Target

    I hate when white parents with black kids make these sorts of statements.

    We have six kids. Three are biologically ours, and three became ours through foster to adoption. My husband and I are white, but not all of our kids are. Our four oldest children are old enough to be aware of the mess going on in this country right now, and you know...I'll be the white parent to say it. It if f**king HARD explaining to a black child, and I don't feel even remotely equipped to do the history and pain an entire race of people have experience justice. I can't relate. I just can't. I hold them and cry with them and tell them it is okay to feel mad and hurt and scared, but I don't pretend to have the answers or be able to fix it beyond our home and local community. Instead we have a family friend who is also a licensed therapist who works with our children (all six of them) to help them through troubling times and situations. They each see her once a month or more if necessary (especially since the three from foster care come with some biological family baggage).

    Fellow white adoptive parents of children of a different race than you, STOP. STOP STOP STOP. You don't have the answers. You can't pretend to even have any idea what it is like. Help you children by finding them someone with whom they can talk who has had the experience of growing up black in America. A good therapist, a family friend, a priest/pastor, whatever. Just stop talking about how your child is going to grow up to be intimidating and threatening. You sound insanely f**king racist.

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    • LaverneandHurling

      I have two acquaintances who have each adopted a child from Ethiopia.

      One has done exactly what you have described: sought help and outside support (they attend camps and events with other families of children who were adopted from Ethiopia, and she is incredibly pragmatic and proactive about making sure her daughter feels supported) and doesn't pretend to have all the answers or be an expert on race relations.

      The other (and her husband) have serious White Savior Complex Syndrome. Lots of "we don't see color!" and "God loves everyone!" and shit like that. They have a biological daughter and clearly adore their son, but he feels like some sort of "We're not racist Southerners!" trophy at times, as awful as that sounds. Like, they want high-fives for the bravery of adopting a child and a BLACK one at that. They always come off as well-meaning but yes, super racist, when they try to talk about any sort of events happening in the world, mostly because it's clear they want their son to "act" white.

      No real point here other than yeah, this happens and it's gross.

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      • Not Sponsored by Target

        I get this. We live in Atlanta, and people always ask me what country my kids are from. I always tell them they are from the next county over...and everyone looks confused because I didn't save them from Africa. Just Clayton County.

        It isn't nearly as well accepted as African adoption is here.

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    • Ahern Allergy Empire

      I love absolutely everything about this comment.

      The "powerful and strong" comment struck me as so horribly offensive. Also, is she implying that violence doesn't happen to black men who have a different build? I can't really see a positive interpretation to that comment and I'm shocked nobody on social media has called her out.

      I wonder if Desmond's first mother is watching this all play out, and what she thinks.

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      • The Missus

        I think what she meant (but which wasn't clear because she's SUCH A CRAPPY WRITER) is that some people will see him as "enormous and strong" because he's black and those people are threatened by all black men, no matter what.

        Poor little 2-year-old pawn in his mother's cringeworthy display of ego.

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        • Ahern Allergy Empire

          I think that is probably what she meant.

          I also think, subconsciously, it's Shauna who is afraid of people of color.

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          • meaculpa

            Well she did write, " Out of the McDonalds in front of me stepped a young Asian woman and man. He was dressed conservatively, all dark blue and business shoes. She was wearing a tan overcoat, over a bright orange skirt about a micromillimeter long. Sheer tights, then tight, black leather, f**k-me boots. As she toddled down the street before me, I was thinking, "Oh honey, why are you working so hard to look like a wh*re?" At this moment, three young black men, huddled in a doorway together, began calling out in whips. "Ooh boy, you've got some girlfriend!! Hey honey, come on over here!" And whistling. It took me back. I hadn't heard that since New York. "

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        • castaway

          I don't know, Missus. If she did mean that future-people would see him as huge and strong and intimidating just because he's black, she only assumed that because she herself sees black men as huge and intimidating - so to me it's all the same. In some place not too far back in her mind, she's afraid of her future son.

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          • The Missus

            I think her own fears play into it in a big way. One kind of has to assume that, given the shockingly poor insight she has into her own emotional issues.

            For those who don't read her or the forum section about her, she actually wrote these words only a week or two ago--"I tend to think of myself as someone with a pretty complex mind. (That's not a compliment. It grows dark and thickety in there sometimes.)"

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    • Yogini Ballerini

      Oh thank god. I felt mean and judgemental when I side-eyed a friend's heartfelt post about how they are so scared about violence and racism hurting their black kids and please won't we all remember that. (Same-sex relationship, they had a sperm donor to have their two kids, mum is white Australian and mama is Chinese-Australian.) I juuuuuuust can't help but think - would you really care about this if you didn't happen to have kids whose biological father was black? This is a person I grew up with and went to high school with - in a very white area.

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  9. Not Sponsored by Target

    I wrote a whole post that I think got eaten.

    TL;DR: We are white parents with black children (and white children), and honestly I feel totally ill equipped to handle racial issues. Instead we use an amazing therapist who specializes in children who come from families of mixed races. All six of our kids see her, and I love her. I wish more parents with kids from different races would stop pretending they understand hundreds of years of experiences and oppression and stop saying stupid shit like RISE UP. You sound like an insensitive idiot.

    Also, way to stereotype your own kid into saying he is going to be intimidating. One of our black kids is a concert violinist. He is absolutely not intimidating. He is more Steve Urkel than LeBron James. I say that lovingly, because he is absolutely awesome. He's just not intimidating. At all. Because being black doesn't make you intimidating, Shauna.

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    • Hamilbread

      She's only saying "Rise Up" because to her it's a Hamilton reference.

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      • Busted Coccyx Club

        Yes!!!! That is the same thing I was thinking.

        Dear Shauna


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  10. Hamilbread

    She's only saying "Rise up" because she's making a Hamilton reference.

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    • Not Sponsored by Target

      We live in Atlanta, and all it makes me think of is the Falcons. It is their motto or whatever.

      So in my head I'm yelling it like the TV announcer.

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      • irisheyes

        Samuel L. Is the man. Shauna is just an idiot. Like most of us who have no idea what it is like to grow up black in America, she just needs to sit down and be quiet. Let those who are living the story tell the story. She doesn't get to co-opt it just because she figured out how to grift a kid.

        What she does need to do is get a freakin' job. "Rise Up," Shauna, and do that for your black son (and your white daughter). They need to grow up in a home where the two perfectly abled adults actually display some responsibility.

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      • Princess Buttercup

        I almost wrote this earlier. That's exactly what it makes me think of.

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    • Suicidal Footman in the Attic

      Well her twitter stalking Lin didn't produce tickets even though she exploited her son in the attempts so maybe she's figuring she stands a better chance using "Rise up". But who is she going to rise up against on Vashon? A magician, a wool spinner, a yoga teacher, and a couple of tech millionaires who make it their weekend getaway? Maybe she'll have Lu choreograph a militant dance routine they can perform on Main St.

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      • Mazel Tov Cocktail

        A militant dance routine they can perform on Main St *spontaneously*

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  11. i love chili dogs

    Did this lady adopt a black kid or something? Has she mentioned that at all?

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  12. Cowboy Cookies

    To quote Zora Neale Hurston, "And God only knows what the world has suffered from the white damsels who try to sing the Blues."

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  13. Ahern Allergy Empire

    Ay God, this is all so incredibly painful.

    How is it that nobody on social media has pointed out she lives on an island with almost zero racial diversity?

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    • Food Of the Proletariat


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      • Palate of a Starved Goat

        Or a hand adept at hitting the "delete" button on any negative comments.

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      • Ahern Allergy Empire

        I bet she is monitoring her IG for critical comments like it's the last piece of bacon on Vashon.

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