Monthly Archives: July 2011


#SwapStories: What Are Your Fave Messica Moments?

While Messica comes down from the high of being essentially ignored at a clothing swap, I’m debating which sneakers are more fetch for drinking a thermos of margaritas on the Brooklyn Bridge. Since I’ll obviously be busy for the next hour doing that, and because we have so many new guests here to GOMIBLOG, I thought I’d open the floor.

So, what is the most classic What I Want Messica moment? What post or comment finally drove you around the bend? If you no longer read WIW (or are reading less),  was there a reason it began to lose its appeal? If you know Messica in real life, is she really as obnoxious as her blogs make her sound?

Let’s have our own swap!



Love Life Lace Confirms They’ve Been Living With Mom

Twatiana of Love Lies Lace decided to come clean to her 8 readers about why they’re living in a backyard shed in the middle of no where earlier today:

Since we got back from California we have been staying with my parents who graciously offered up my old room to us. It’s been wonderful and interesting being back; having to share one tiny closet and squeeze all of our belonging we would need for the next three months into my bedroom. But as we say in Russia “V tesnote da ne v obide” translation: “In a crush, yet without resentment.” We have been enjoying my mum’s fantastic cooking, spending time with our family and having a relatively free summer.

In the meantime we have also been making frequent trips to our new home in Virginia, which is actually an old home. It’s a small cabin that belongs to Kevin’s family and we will be making our new life there. It was in pretty bad shape so we, along with a few contractors, have spent the past two months giving it a new life. It’s small, it has no central AC, there’s no driveway and the water looks like orange Kool-Aid but we’re thrilled. All those things don’t matter when you can’t see another house for miles, it’s actually quiet – really quiet and the beauty all around is breathtaking.

Blah, blah, blah, she’s done this all before. She uses a duck and cover, “prayer solves everything!” white-washing routine to scrub events and make sure everything comes up roses. She goes on to justify the sudden move from California because living there didn’t “feel right” and turns what seemed to everyone on the Internet to be a move necessitated by unemployment into a fun, basement-dwelling East Coast adventure.

While the unicorns are out feeding in their new woodsy backyard, Tati should consider the fact that her habit of writing a lot of shit that actually doesn’t say anything and white-washing everything to keep her ego blogger qualification card is a big turn off. Oh well, at least her husband got a job, so we can look forward to more of her twee housewife posts.



Cary Randolph Is Classy At Parties

Cary Randolph Jefferson Washington Kennedy Fuller, swears she is a WASP, never misses a party. Last week Cary went to High Suhssietty Greenwich and showed a bunch of hedge funders what class and breeding is all about:

I was at this party in Greenwich last week. A hedge funder’s McMansion on Round Hill Road. My friends call these shindigs “rape and murder” because that’s basically what we expect, that and a lot of tan lines where wedding rings should be. We dove into the rosé, and then, after dark, while chatting with a gentleman who lamented his second wife’s existence because I am starting to figure out that wives are just expensive, inconvenient decoration, I dove into the pool trailing yards and yards of ivory tulle and eyelet behind me. Ha: tulle in the pool. It was just so hot that night, and nothing looks prettier under water than a party dress.

Sounds like someone’s bitter that she didn’t get welcomed with dropped jaws and whispers of “who IS that fascinating creature” from the crowd. Nothing says WASPy debutante like getting drunk and diving into a swimming pool in an evening dress. At a hedge funder’s party house. Drunk on rose. Keep it classy, honey! I’m sure Topper is writing home to mom right now, telling her he’s found a new drunken blonde wife.



BleuBirdVintage Thinks Bunnies Are Birthday Props

“Miss James”, the babypimping blogger of “Bleubird Vintage”, is making sure her meal ticket’s first birthday is twee enough to inspire thousands of “AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWs” from her followers. To that end, she spent this afternoon trying to find a way to make bunnies happen:

so renting a bunny petting zoo for birdies bday will cost me $250 for an hour but i can just buying 4 bunnies for $80. hmmm…6 hours ago

i’m thinking buy the bunnies and then after the party bring them back to the bunny store… no? 6 hours ago

making a phone call now… “what’s the return policy on your bunnies?” 6 hours ago

Unfortunately twitter didn’t find this plan as cute as she did, and she had to chest puff about how it was a joke:

calm down everybody… i’m not actually going to buy and return bunnies. i’m joking. doesn’t anybody do that anymore? 5 hours ago

OHHH it was a JOKE! Oh I get it now! Using living things as props so your little sponsor magnet can have a Christina Crawford birthday party is hilarious! Just a joke, don’t take it so seriously!



Emphasis Added Wants To Know Who The Bride Is

Sigh. Emily of Emphasis Added, professional humblebragger, seems to be trying to understand gay marriage by asking “So, which one of you is the girl?”

Last week at dinner with Andrew, we got to discussing the passing of Gay Marriage in New York. (Wohoo!)

My bro-in-law lives in Manhattan and has been in a committed relationship with his partner for 8 years. He mentioned that he had never given marriage much thought until it became a possibility for them. He said that now that he COULD get married, there has been a sort of spotlight shined on his relationship. And all of a sudden Inquiring minds want to know..

will you? do you want to? have you discussed it?

My question for him (after asking all of the above, of course) was: which one of you will pop the question?

His response: “I don’t know! This is pretty much uncharted territory for us.”

In a hetero relationship it is still more common for the man to do the asking. And so, we wondered…is there proposal protocol in a gay relationship?

Should his friends be waiting for a ring or saving for one.

All the rules of thumb we came up with seemed so arbitrary. The older half of the couple could do the asking or the one who makes more money or the hotter one (that was a joke) or the smarter one or maybe the one not doing the wedding planning.

We figured we ought to take it to a larger audience. And so I ask you:

What do you think…is there proposal protocol anymore?

I wouldn’t be surprised if she also asks “So, who wears the dress at the wedding? So, which one does little Oolahn call ‘mom’? So, who does the cooking and cleaning, and who pays the bills?” LOL! Attempting to apply 1950’s hetero courtship and marriage stereotypes to the changing landscape of love and families is SO FUN! Not as much fun as shoe shopping at Barney’s with Haze, but like, SO WAY close to it! Teehee!



Majority of New York Somehow Manages To Not Care About Jessica Quirk’s Book Party

Jessica Quirk, former style expert, is currently on a plane on her way to NYC for her BIG BIG NIGHT. As Sara Zucker, Rich Tong, John Jannuzzi,  OscarPRGirl, Jessica Chu, and 200 20-something wanna be style bloggers descend on the DKNY store in SoHo, we remind you all to take care as you walk down Broadway. No doubt the street will be flooded with thousands of people clamoring for a glimpse of the number one world famous person with a tumblr.

Sarcasm aside, is anyone else kind of going “huh”? It’s like a two hour mid-week after work event. You’d think if she were such a BFD in the fashion industry that Kate Spade and OdlR could have gotten together and thrown her a big industry shindig on a rooftop somewhere. But nope, it’s just going to be the same 15 people that go to all the tumblr fashion parties and not even a mention so far in any “what to do tonight” lists that are all over NYC – not even the GofG calendar.

You know how you have that one friend who acts like her birthday is a celebrity worthy event and talks it up for weeks, and then you go and it’s just you and the same 9 friends you always hang out with? That’s what this reminds me of. Oh well, time to make a guess on what she will wear. I’m going to bet on a borrowed dress from OdlR or something – it’s her BIG NIGHT in NYC and I doubt she will show up in anything less than major designer if she can help it. Or maybe some c/o crap from DKNY if she can’t convince a big label to lend her something. And of course her footsweat soaked, swamp smell Coach clompers. Place your bets now!



Jessica Quirk Would Like To Continue This Via Email

Jessica Quirk is in the middle of her bi-coastal book bash, meeting her 900 readers and selling books in her c/o outfits. Apparently all this new exposure is bringing out her critics and she just doesn’t have time for your negativity!

fashiongrl: I respect and admire your business savvy and would love to make my hobby my career – especially with a book deal (SO exciting). However, I am really missing the originality and pizazz you had when you lived in NYC. Your outfits then were inspiring, a bit out of the box. I bought colored tights for the first time because of your blog! But now, it seems a bit lackluster. I was shocked to see that you wore such a simple dress for your book signing in San Fran. What is different/stand out about that? How can I, as a reader, pull inspiration from a simple dress with barely an accessory in sight? I could go into a store and buy a Kate Spade dress and wear it. I long for the NYC style and the extra special touches from the past. Maybe it’s because with a blog/a book, it puts you on another level, a fashion pedestal. You need to live up to that a bit more. I’m not saying that in a harsh way, but because I want you to continue forward! Please go back to what made your blog so special in the first place.

The comment, which has received 6 likes so far, got the standard “I dress for me” response from Messica:

Thanks for the feedback! I absolutely understand that not every outfit is going to speak to you, and that’s ok! This is a reflection of my closet and how I’m evolving as a person. I know I’m not the same girl I was three years ago, and I’m not only ok with that, I’m glad! I don’t think that the change in my style has anything to do with the blog or the book, it’s just about me and my life.

What makes a ‘wow’ outfit to one gal is going to be different from the next. I can tell you that I felt like a million bucks in a well fitted sundress – regardless of the label.

“fashiongrl” wasn’t done, though:

But you’re running a business here. I can’t open a cupcake shop and expect it to be successful if I only sell vanilla cupcakes when I used to sell surprising flavors that brought my customers in… You see what I’m saying? It doesn’t matter that vanilla cupcakes are my favorite and what makes ME happy. I have a customer to please as well.

Since Messica cannot have such negativity on her profitable famous blog, she finally brought out her version of  “this conversation is over”:

The only thing I’m promising here is to share my personal style with you. Even menus evolve with time. 😉

Feel free to e-mail me if you’d like to continue this convo!

She just can’t bring herself to admit that she got married, moved to the midwestern ‘burbs, and just doesn’t care as much anymore. She would probably much rather be making her “That’s Quirky” general lifestyle blog happen, but can’t let go of the internets fame from WIW. So it’s just excuse after excuse for her growing mediocrity, and when she can’t deal anymore, pulling a Julia Allison “let’s discuss this privately!”

And in case anyone wondered why she chose yet another boring Kate Spade dress/Coach shoes outfit for her San Francisco book signing: “Kate Spade New York c/o Shop It To Me”.