Mommy Blogging WTF

Mommy Wants Vodka Was Terminal

Aunt Becky, the human equivalent of a telenovela, has posted the dramatic tale of her latest trip to the hospital for her broken femur.

…I realize they have stabilized my neck. Frighteningly, I have absolutely zero memory of the incident leading up to this ambulance – I only know that my femur and hip are broken. For the second time in two months…Then it all goes black.

She recounts what was going on around her…while she was in a coma. Apparently the doctor said she “snapped the titanium rod in two pieces” and it was “by far one of the worst breaks” the doctor had ever seen.

She has an infection, this may be contributing to why she hasn’t yet woken up after surgery, I could hear the doctor. The cultures from her femur are a nasty group alpha streptococcus. She’s going to both need a central line and indefinite antibiotics.

She hears the doctor say “she has brain waves indicative of excellent brain function” but Aunt Becky just wasn’t waking up. Then Aunt Becky hears the doctor say she’s dying.

She is terminal. We are very sorry. We’ve done all we can, I can hear them say. Her children should say their goodbyes.

At this point Becky claims she woke up the next day, which is when I assume she jumped on twitter. Because even when you’ve just come back from the brink of death, your priority should be the intarwebs.