It seems just a year ago, Emily Brill had a birthday, and now she has another one! What is she now, 27? Well anyway, Brilly knows what she wants for her present. A pony? A job? A Bacon Explosion Cake? No! Dear Matt Stone and Trey Parker: As usual, I would like a Team America sequel for my birthday. 2:25 PM Dec 10th from web We eagerly await some party pics or maybe some fun stories of Embones stumbling out of Amy Winehouse's flat yelling about Malt-O-Meal or something. Congrats! On behalf of the Internets we have a Pork of...

Ashley, forever, is finally speaking out against all the evil women out there who don't see the big red "Property Of" stamp on her husband's face, and dare to have a crush on him. A female friend had e-mailed him saying that a friend of hers had a crush on him...it was just a harmless message, right? No.  It’s not harmless...That treacherous Jezebel!  I have a problem with it.  I have a serious problem with it. Ashley then provides a list of reasons why your crush on her husband is terrible and awful and you're a bad person who should feel bad. The...

Poundcake, the only female employee at tumblr and don't you forget it,  continues her quest to make sure every single person alive knows that guys find her attractive. Look, I'm sure she's a fresh faced, adorable, all American girl or whatever, but this business of constantly reminding the internet that some guy hit on her or said she is attractive  reeeeeeeeeeeks of insecurity. I know I know, welcome to "lifecasting" and "being real" on the internet. But this isn't Poundcake writing a moving, poignant account of her self-esteem issues and talking about how she craves the male attention to validate...

@caro it's because of your professional-looking hair. ;) 2 hours ago via Siftee

Lexi Reed, all day every day is me time, wants you guyzzzzz to prioritize me time - even if that means dumping your grandmother at the doctor and leaving her there alone while you talk to instagram. (more…)

Jordan Reid Strech Bepkow Whoever, woman in tech, is off on a long weekend in Maine - a "dog free" weekend. The vocal animal lover dropped her dogs off at the kennel and took off for a well deserved vacation planned by her omgwonderful husband Kenny. In her absence, let's not talk about how she's a famewhoring failed actress turned shillblogger. Let's talk about pet advocate Jordan's stunning record of perfect pet ownership. Apparently between California and Brooklyn, Miss Jordan managed to lose a pet: i recently decided that i'm deathly tired of los angeles, and am selling my house,...

Despite never apparently practicing Judaism at any point in her adult life she is now choosing to light a Menorah - while proclaiming she doesn't 'identify as anything personally'.

In a stunning moment of "wait, wut" heard round the internet, Gina, who once claimed to be a strong black woman, has decided the final weeks of graduate school are simply more suffering than any human should have to bear. In fact, she would prefer an easy way out. I'm just so glad someone finally said this! I'm so tired of people with cancer acting like it's so hard. I just want to be like, uh, boo hoo, try grad school sometime! /sarcasm off /me rage bear stares