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Peter Feld Showed Up

Peter Feld, huge fan of GOMIBLOG, has received yet another gush from thatchickallison: Triumph! So, not only did I get Peter Feld to come out to Sabrina’s Versailles (write-up coming) event last night in SoHo, but Jennifer and I succeeded afterwards in getting him to come with us to Delicatessen (review coming).  We felt accomplished.  Thanks for humoring us, Peter Feld. As you no doubt couldn't care less about, TGA wet her pink tights on Halloween when the Human Fog Machine appeared at some party: And then… Peter Feld showed up :) Ohhhhh dawg! Get in there and toss her...
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Rachel's Boyfriend David Karp Flees Country

David Karp has departed for Europe after criminally inflicting Tumblr on the intarnets. As you probably don't recall, Rachel and her boyfriend are  driving around Europe this month under the guise of "vacation". We know the truth. They are trying to escape the angry mob of bloggers who hate him for sucking up their lives with tumblicity and liking this post-ness. Run, David. Just remember The Internet follows you everywhere.

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National GOMIgraphic Captures First Pictures Of Mary Rambin Eating

Mary Rambin, scientific name: mexicanus drunkanius, has at last been photographed eating naturally. Scientists hid behind chorizo stands on the street for weeks, hoping to capture the elusive moment. I know. When I saw this pic, I laughed, I cried, I called my mom and told her I loved her. I knew we were making history right here, folks. Yes, we finally know it's true: one time, Mary Rambin ATE SOMETHING.
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Kevin Rose Has Girlfriend, God Laughs At Your Loneliness

Kevin Rose, revolving door for vaginas, is calling someone 'gf' again on his twitter. This may have been going on for a while and I didn't notice. What, don't give me that look. I don't check his twitter everyday, he's boring as watching a frog sweat. Anyway, the exciting tweet: Enjoying some michter's whiskey with the gf, good stuffabout 1 hour ago from Tweetie This could be any one of 4.5 million women, and could have been going on for six months or nine days. Kevin basically wipes his nose with women so I really don't care enough to find...
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Emily Brill Finds Your Behavior Troubling

Emily Brill, ultimate narrator, is troubled by your immature behavior. Troubling. Please read. RT @clairecm "how Twitter reinforces the tendency of adults to behave like hs students..." http://bit.ly/2d8juy1:59 AM Nov 2nd from web I used to find it troubling that a 27 year old girl insisted on dressing like a 65 year old matriarch on her way to brunch at the Ladies' Club, but since no one has seen ol Brill lately we assume she got a stylist and fixed that situation. More troubling is the fact that 12 or so years after the rest of the planet discovered that...

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It's Just Not A Holiday Until We Catch Up With Whatshername

thatdopeallison, everyone's favorite failwhale, spent her Halloween wearing what ever the that is there. My outfit for a night.  Not really a costume, so much as a reason to wear my pink tights!  Which everyone loved, by the way. Wow! A bunch of drunk people at a tumblrs anonymous meeting LOVED your target tights. AWSE! Oh no, not saying I don't believe you. No I do. No, I DO. No, oh come on you don't have to... This made me feel kinda special.  Can every day be the day after Halloween? JESUS. Could anyone be more insanely desperate for validation?...
Halloween Internets Julia Allison


Be Something Besides "Slutty" For Halloween Already

Look, I expected "slutty ballerina" from the likes of Julia Allison. She could wear a nun habit and with a bedazzler and a dream it would be "slutty nun habit". But I sort of hoped for a tad more creativity out of the self-proclaimed media elite. I mean, really, Rachel Sklar? (I have judges robes for Slutty Sotomayor, but that's my runner up) (I assume people know that these costumes ideas are IRONIC)about 10 hours ago from TweetDeck I can't find my Susan Boyle wig or my judge's robes! (Tho I do have a judge's wig). I have a windbreaker....Slutty...
Halloween Internets


Shalloween – Nick Mc’s Inspector Flasher

Nick McGlynn, biggest hands in NYC, decided the only way to get the ladies was by being a walking gadget. MY INSPECTOR GADGET COSTUME IS COMPLETE!! Well, points for apparently constructing it himself.
Cary Randolph Internets


Cary Is Gleaming That Cube All Up In NYC

Cary, the only midwestern girl in NYC, wants to help you become a badass! That's right, gurl has a foolproof plan to make your cool factor go through the rizoof! How to be a skater girl in New York City: I’ve been shredding all over Manhattan for about six months now. When I began, I didn’t know grip tape from wheels, and I thought trucks were what my boyfriends drove in high school.  These days every time I pop into a friend’s apartment or our preferred brunch spot avec deck, I hear the same sweet song: “I want to learn!”...
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Silicon Valley Makes Sarah Cranky

Sarah Lacy, apparently in need of Immodium, had a bad case of the crankies upon her return from China: slightly cranky mood today. let's see if blueprintcleanse + a fun 10:30 meeting can turn that around.12:51 PM Oct 27th from web Of course Michael Arrington didn't see it that way... @sarahcuda "slightly cranky mood today" is a understatement.about 23 hours ago from web in reply to sarahcuda Poor Sarah couldn't even get some decent sleep last night. Those darn grubs were still there when she woke up! can't sleep and annoyed so i got up to work. honestly, less than...
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Totally Forgettable Chick I Forgot About Got Haircut

It's hair day here at GOMIBLOG, and thatgirlallison, future intern and everyone's favorite person to email me how much they don't care about, is sporting uh...this. The hair is fine blah blah. Why is she always looking up? Is she Audrina Patridge or whoever? Sweetie, it's a pattern... What the is that 'pose' about? Anyway, nice haircut.
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Caro McCarthy Finally Embraces Her Nonugly

OMGBEARS is in California, where she obviously blinked her doll eyes, looked around, and said "holy bears, hair salons!" I went to LA and look what it did to my hair. http://twitpic.com/n7rqyabout 2 hours ago from TweetDeck Oh, Bears! This is great. You know that thing they did, with the water, and the shampoo? Yeah, keep doing that. You know, on the daily. It's not just a treat for you at the salon. Also, throw out all your rubber bands and wear that Crap down for a while. Ok, good job, now look around and find a store that's not...
Internets Julia Allison


Julia Allison Seeking A Lucky (Attractive, Patient, Independently Wealthy) Person

Have you always wanted a thankless job where you learn no viable job skills, and will get The Eyebrow from hiring managers as you try to explain your job duties? Well you are in luck! Julia Allison is still somehow convincing people to be her unpaid personal assistant under the guise of being an "intern". Possible candidates must: - know how to twitter that you’re enjoying a really fabulous party when secretly you want to twitter that you’re wearing giant underwear eating cupcakes at home. - be really good at listening to Meghan talk about her AWESOME iPhone! Tell her...
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Our Mermaid Mary Doing Her Part To Get You Some Income

While I remain unemployed, the Mermaid, Mary Rambin, decides to taunt me with another developer job I will never have: Unfortunately my very talented “web guy” Craig Spaeth has been overloaeded by his professors with meaningless assignments and tedious busy work (kidding!). So, I’m looking to bring on a replacement for on-going part-time work. Currently I’m looking for someone to redsign my Tumblr as well as a few new pages. You must be able to program it as well. Minimum commitment is 6 months, work will be sporadic and flexible to your schedule. That's right kids. While Mary cavorts about...
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Paultato's New Gimmick Is To Give Up Previous Gimmick

Paul Carr, the increasingly boring ass cancer of the editorial world, has decided to pep things up a bit. How will he do that? No, not throwing out his laptop and taping his mouth. He's going to pull one of those predictable they-think-it's-dramatic stunts that those in his toenail gazing circle think will shock and awe us into paying attention to them. Eh, not really. He's just going to quit drinking! Naturally he has to make this sound like he is changing his  DNA or something, and not just putting the glass down: One complicating factor (in my head at...
Cary Randolph Internets


Look You Hillbillies, Cary Just Has Style, Ok?

Cary Randolph, She-Ra's less hot sister, is home in Muzzurah or Kansas or whatever backwater spewed her forth. Of course after 15 years as the only midwestern girl in NYC, she's able to teach the toothless TJ Maxx shoppers a thing or two about STYLE! KB and I reunited yesterday at her family’s Homecoming tailgate and as usual tied for Best Dressed, thanks in great part to her fly-ass boots and my open toes. Look you hillbillies, take a tip from Cary: wear a fly fishing jacket over some white Guess jeans and some open toed shoes (wtf to a...
Internets


Attention China, Your Food Makes Sarah Sick

Sarah Lacy, lover of foreign culture, is having a little tummy twubble after eating uh...rice and vegetables: my stomach seems to be punishing me for three weeks of chinese food. (was worth it btw) i'd kill for a baked potato and a diet coke.about 15 hours ago from web So basically she would rather have Irish food? Why not just say "Thanks for the great time, China! I like yer little boats and Crap! By the way, your beloved cuisine that has been a staple of your daily life for over 5000 years? Fucking sucked! Haha just kidding. Seriously though,...
Cary Randolph Internets


Scary Is Way Thugger Than You

Scary Randolph, who's been spending most her life living in a gangster's paradise, is proud to announce she thugs: CR: I thug on a regular basis. EVG: Do you even know what "thug" means? CR: I know what it means to be a thug, but the verb eludes me. EVG: It means never having to say you're sorry. Duh. Miss Thugsalot is currently touring the mean ghettos of her youth, schoolin bortches and not takin no disrespect, yawl.
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One Time, Regina George Punched Randi, And It Was AWESOME

Good lord. Randi Zuckerberg, the suckuparific sister of facebook, has spent way too much time the last few days telling Julia Allison her hair is pretty and all the boys totally like her. Sparkly dress? Check. Sparkly toenail polish? Check. Sparkly friend? @juliaallison check. Ready for @davemorin's party!11:56 PM Oct 17th from TwitterBerry Ok, what? Calm the down. I see Sparkles there convinced you to dress up as a sparkly bruise so you could match. And here I thought you were a successful lady working person, not Jessica Wakefield trying to join the Unicorn Club. Anyway, it goes on... Enjoyed...
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Caro Has Unique Criteria For "End of Recession"

Caroline McCarthy, of the huge tracts of land McCarthys, has some rather strange ideas of what constitutes national economic recovery: Swag alert: We have slap bracelets, light-up badges, and Silly Putty. OMG, the recession is so over.about 14 hours ago from TweetDeck I for one think it is premature to declare this recession over before there is kettle corn and glow sticks, but I applaud Caro's cautious optimism.
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