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Jenna Cole Lifestyle Blogging Jenna Cole, monetized, monetizes her blog. Like most of the other mommy/lifestyle/whatever bloggers, she sometimes writes up product reviews in sponsored posts, and gives away whatever it is the company sends her. Recently she ran a review for some company’s skin cream. After saying a lot of nothing about the product, she offered some earrings she had lying around from Poland as a gift to someone who followed her twitter or pinned something on the latest time waster for women addicted to Google Image Search. Apparently the deceitful winner did neither, and Jenna Justice prevailed: As soon as she gets accepted to BYU and reads e-books for two months, she will be a college graduate. Maybe the next time you “low educated” giveaway thugs try to pull the wool over Jenna’s eyes you’ll remember that The Eyes Of Powerpoint are upon you! Jenna Cole, professor of Mormon oppression, has apparently been missing from the internet since January 25. While twitter is busy asking where she went, the GOMIBLOG Forum has been discussing her disappearance as well. GOMIBLOG member Pickle posted a tweet from January 25 telling Jenna “I’m thinking about you right now and praying for you…I can’t even imagine what you’re feeling…I am so so sorry.” Several GOMIBLOG Forum catladies responded with shows of concern, hoping nothing bad had happened to Jenna or her family. Others came up with theories that include That Husband moving to SF without her, death of a relative, and Jenna trying to clean up the internet. One tweet mentions a “time crunch” perhaps indicating a problem with housing or school. At any rate, we certainly hope nothing tragic has happened to Bathroom Baby and that Jenna lets everyone know what’s up. Since she spent so much time cultivating an online group of friends that became invested in her life it seems unfair to leave them in the dark. Besides, it’s hard to monetize the hate when you don’t post!
Jenna Cole, open minded and accepting, is using twitter to alert her fans to an atrocious new form of racism: hating Magic Mormon Undies. When her twitter followers pointed out that a religious belief is hardly on par with bigotry against genetics, Jenna attempted to sound intelligent: To be fair, Jenna would know all about the “latent racism that stubbornly persists” among middle class white people out in the square states. Then again this is probably just Jenna trying to stir the pot and make money from your eyerolling. That has to be it, right? Nobody can possibly really think “laughing at the top secret magick underpants” = “racism”…right? Jenna Cole, head counselor of the MENSA summer camp known as “That Wife”, glories in being an uninformed ass. More importantly she enjoys attention, so she can’t possibly have a thought and keep it to herself. To that end, she spent her Thursday tweeting* about how we shouldn’t keep books in libraries because poor people don’t use them anyway: I know this is a common argument, but low income largely use the Internet, no?…I think libraries should stop funneling so much money toward physical books and look toward digital options…buy less books, invest in more ebooks (which tax payers want) and computers/Internet…this doesn’t mean that there wouldn’t be ANY books. But I think it’s naive to say “we have to keep books b/c…all the low income people check them out all the time”. If you are low income, it’s often because you are…low educated. It would make more sense to funnel more money toward educating people. 5 Jan via Twitter for iPhone Because people with good educations never live on the poverty line! Yes, if only the government would stop wasting money on library books and start sending everyone to college for free! That would solve EVERYTHING! Suddenly the lower class would disappear! Jenna for President! * tweets were compiled for easier reading, separations marked by ellipses That Wife, of the Powerpoint Wives, refuses to acknowledge Santa in her house. Does it have something to do with being Mormon? Of course not. Is it because she enjoys refusing her son anything that smacks of childhood? No sir. She does it because she is an honest person! It’s really important to me that my kids know when I tell them something, it’s what I really believe to be true. And there is no way to get around the fact that because I believe me telling my kid Santa is real is a lie, I thus think you are lying to your child when you tell them Santa lives at the North Pole and will physically come into your home and leave presents one night every year. Yes folks, the magic of Christmas has nothing to do with Santa, the magic of Christmas is about teaching your kids they can’t dream and wish for anything they want: There are so many other things I’d love to get into, including what kids learn about money and budgeting from being told they can possibly have anything they put down on a piece of paper, but I’ll save that for next year. Maybe since “Our friend who isn’t doing Santa said it worked so well in the last area they lived because they were in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood” it would be better if Jenna and her husband moved? Or maybe we should just all put on our lists that Santa should bring That Wife some chill cookies and a glass of maternal instinct.
Jenna Cole Lifestyle Blogging Mommy Blogging That Wife’s Jenna Cole, attention whore, informed her facebook pals yesterday that she had a “doozy of a post going up” going up today about her kid’s speech therapy or something. And why is she putting up this post, knowing people will give her crap about it? Cold hard cash, my friends. The stream goes on with Jenna basically admitting that at this point she puts up posts hoping GOMIBLOG will send her traffic, as “I’ve already made enough to buy a site redesign via Poodle AND keep that coat from BP I was planning to return. Monetizing the hate indeed.” When someone points out that maybe those aren’t the best reasons to write posts, she responds: [I]n some ways, there is no way I can write about ANYTHING without them freaking out. I try so hard not to read their site, but it’s so addicting to see how dumb they can be…it’s financially savvy of me to try my best to remain genuine (of course) but goad them just enough that I continue to grow and make money off of it. If I have this opportunity right in front of me to benefit, why not take it? In a lot of ways it helps me cope emotionally by enforcing that I have the upper hand. So there you go. That Wife posts crap to “goad” GOMIBLOG “just enough” so we will post about her and make her some money. What a genuine, lovely woman blogging for all the right reasons. At least now when she is whining and crying about bullies and meanies, folks will know it’s all a bunch of crap – she encourages your outrage so she can make money for clothes and site design, and have “the upper hand”. Stay classy, Jenna. That Wife’s Jenna Cole is best known as the woman who lets her husband lock up the cheese to help her lose weight. A long cherished dream for hatefans of That Wife came true last week, when they were promised a peek inside the notorious Cheese Locker. We combed the pics looking for a padlock, a firebox, a package of Kraft singles fortified with 200 flex cuffs. Alas, though several pics were shared on the “Inside the Fridge” article, no evidence could be found of the cheese safe. So where is this mysterious place where Jenna’s cheese is locked? The internets demands to know!
Jenna Cole Is Checking Up On You
Internet Speculates On Radio Silence Of “That Wife”
Jenna Cole Lifestyle Blogging Mommy Blogging
That Wife Wants You To Stop Being Racist Towards Mormons
@hernewleaf No no, the author wasn’t implying that Mormonism is a race. The idea is that we mock people who wear “backwards” clothing b/c we…associate that kind of thing with other cultures/races who are uneducated and somehow “less than”…This sentence was key for me: rather, mockery of Mormon temple garments as “magic underwear” could possibly be seen to reveal…latent racism that stubbornly persists among white, middle-class Americans against the various races & ethnicities of the world…whom they mentally associate with (silly or superstitious?) religious costumes worn out of ignorance or oppression.
Dear Poor People, That Wife Says You’re Just Uneducated
That Wife Hates Santa
Jenna Cole Will Monetize Your Hate
Internet Disappointed By That Wife’s Fridge
