Courtney Shields, still looking for a rich second husband, suddenly announced on her instagram stories yesterday that she was a victim of physical abuse.

Good lord. Randi Zuckerberg, the suckuparific sister of facebook, has spent way too much time the last few days telling Julia Allison her hair is pretty and all the boys totally like her. Sparkly dress? Check. Sparkly toenail polish? Check. Sparkly friend? @juliaallison check. Ready for @davemorin's party!11:56 PM Oct 17th from TwitterBerry Ok, what? Calm the down. I see Sparkles there convinced you to dress up as a sparkly bruise so you could match. And here I thought you were a successful lady working person, not Jessica Wakefield trying to join the Unicorn Club. Anyway, it goes on... Enjoyed...

Jessica Schroeder, self-important blogger and hater of the obese poor, is tired of people with their thoughts and stuff sharing their thoughts about her on the internets: Ugh, Internet Every 4-6 months I really need a break from the Internet. It’s not just that everyone with a modem has an opinion, it’s like EVERYONE IS SCREAMING WHAT THEY THINK ABOUT YOU AND EVERYTHING ELSE! AHHHHHGGGGRRRAHHHHHHHSCREAM! I have a week until I need to turn in my manuscript and I don’t know if I’ve ever felt more pressure in my life. The voices outside are so much louder than my inner...

thatdopeallison, everyone's favorite failwhale, spent her Halloween wearing what ever the that is there. My outfit for a night.  Not really a costume, so much as a reason to wear my pink tights!  Which everyone loved, by the way. Wow! A bunch of drunk people at a tumblrs anonymous meeting LOVED your target tights. AWSE! Oh no, not saying I don't believe you. No I do. No, I DO. No, oh come on you don't have to... This made me feel kinda special.  Can every day be the day after Halloween? JESUS. Could anyone be more insanely desperate for validation?...

Hey Natalie Jean, totally almost Jewish, bids you Gut Shabbos with a timely and hilarious Anne Frank post to her instagram. Live from her hashtagged European tour we present a totally ok joke to make on a Saturday of all days. You have to hand it to her - she really knows how to close out Pesach, am I right?

"antikris", self-important blogger wannabe and job she has passion for seeker, is apparently pretending to not be asshurt over being made fun of: “ If I got upset over every loser on the internet who bashed me, I’d never get anything done.AntiKris- so go ahead, you’re boosting my traffic.. Ohhhh snap snap! Go on, girlfriend! In the meantime, she didn't care so much that she posted a Russian novel about her haterz. There, have some more traffic! I would post it here, but a) it's your typical whiny, boring, self-righteous slag drag justifying her posts and her life (style points...

Stasia, the garlic scented grifter, finally got herself a job. She's driving for Uber and the job comes with a perk - being able to use her passengers as social media content. She has posted a photo of one of her passengers who appears to be passed out near the backseat along with a caption detailing his behavior with her new hashtag "#stasiasuberstories'. (more…)

Rach Parcell announced today she has joined the gaggle of influencers listing their homes for sale - to the tune of $10,300,000.