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Cary Randolph Internets So I actually had this to post a few days ago, never queued it, then forgot about it, because that’s how bored I am of Cary. But I did want to satisfy the readers who wanted to know what she was wearing when she de-pantsed the last Friday night: Choosing my get-up for the Pop Up was of course a code red crisis, but in the eleventh hour I managed to pull together an ensemble that, in all its chino glory, evoked safaris and hunts and stiff scotch swilling – absolutely perfect for stealth reporting in the sartorial trenches. With the exception of the French Connection blouse (which later became a dress), all pieces are by J. Crew. The phenomenal tiered brass and wood bead necklace I scooped up last summer at Irvington, Virginia’s Dandelion. Zzzzzzz DOG ATE HOMEWORK! Oh, she’s done. So yeah, there you have it. Another thrilling head to know from a “fashion blogger”. You may now resume pretending to nap so you don’t have to clear the table. Mary Rambin, who really should just admit that Julia Allison gives her a case of the stabbies, is famous among sad, lonely hater circles for her head to toes, in which she proves time and time again why you shouldn’t adhere to trends just because the runway told you so. Case in point: Cute hair. Love the shoes, but Mary, sweetheart, those pants? Yeah, no. Your harem pants are like the vagina version of this: I really don’t think Mary wants it to look like her ladycave hisses and flares up to scare away men.
OMG PHOTO REMOVED DUE TO GUY FREAKING THE FUCK OUT NO REALLY I HOPE HE’S OK CONSIDERING I’M A TINY NOTHING BLOG AND NOT FUCKING GAWKER, SO LIKE 9 PEOPLE SAW THE PHOTO AND PRETTY SURE THEY ALL KNOW I WASN’T TRYING TO TAKE CREDIT FOR IT, BUT HEY MAN IT’S GONE HOPE YOU RECOVER FROM YOUR STROKE, PEACE LOL OK NEW PIC So I finally bought a crap to give and googled Rachel Sklar, of the Rachel Sklars, to see exactly who she was and why any of you cared about her. Apparently she’s “Editor-At-Large” for that mediaCrape website. Editor-At-Large. What does that even mean? Is that a real thing? Anyway, I guess she’s important, or she thinks she’s important, or Julia Allison thinks she’s important, but I don’t know anyone outside of my media buddies who knows who she is. I guess that’s why I found this tweet of hers kind of funny: “Glenn Beck…suffers from a malady common among media celebrities: BelieveYourOwnHype-itis.” @poniewozik – http://bit.ly/6vVP7Q 29 minutes ago from TweetDeck I’m secretly hoping she actually gets the irony of posting this tweet, but part of me thinks she is in earnest and doesn’t see at all why I’m laughing. But hey, the words are true: it is a common malady amongst the NYC media crowd. For instance, juliaspublicist (writer for RBNS and GOMIBLOG) thinks he is Antonio Banderas. Shira Lazar, Media Empress, has an exquisitely boring twitter. To be honest I don’t even know what the hole this woman does outside of attending things with Julia Allison. Is she a writer? TV person? WHY IS SHE FAMOUS? Anyway, this week on She-Ra’s twitter stream: wow watching funny tv for work is like so funnny! http://bit.ly/1SK25W 9:08 PM Nov 17th from TweetDeck so my swedish friend actually dm’d me that he is eating swedish meatballs right now- no offense but it’s so cliche, i can’t stop laughing. 2:34 PM Nov 19th from TweetDeck Omg this oreo pancake is freakin’ crazy! #breakfastwin 3:25 PM Nov 21st from TwitterBerry is it weird, funny or random when the same person always sees you on your laptop at the same coffee shop- hmmmm 7:28 PM Nov 21st from TweetDeck How can u take mario lopez seriously? those dimples are like cleavage. They keep distracting me! about 5 hours ago from TwitterBerry It’s about as earth shattering as any random 13 year old’s twitter, and for some kind of self-proclaimed “Media Empress” it just doesn’t seem very interesting. Then again I don’t know who in the universal hole she is, so maybe it doesn’t matter what she tweets, none of it will make any sense to me. Seriously though, does anyone know who the Crap this chick is? Emily Brill is currently busy writing her “memoir”, so she doesn’t have much time to tweet. She also doesn’t have time for the frivolous tastes of the average NYT reader: How is it possible, heading into a Monday morning, that Tom Friedman’s “Grandma” is the MOST emailed item in the entire NYT? about 3 hours ago from web What do you have to say for yourself, NYT? How can your ignorant readers choose such a story to be the “MOST emailed item”??? What kind of news source posts such a piece of fluff, anyway? If I wanted to read Crap like that I’d go to salon.com. Take a lesson from the Ultimate Narrator: be deep and thought provoking or go home. Rachel is about to make the entire vaginal population of the tumblr nation go into emo spasm. Her Boyfriend David Karp just posted this to his bloggy thingy: Cary Randolph, rad grrl, spent her Friday shopping flea markets, eating lobster, “sulking in a corner at Soho House”, and squeeing her pants over the Boom Boom Room. Of course, all that lobster and martinis made those pants a little tight: Y’all know how much I love khaki pants. But after midnight they did not work to my advantage. They felt constricting. They felt wrong. They put me at an unfair disadvantage when fighting for bar space with a leopard minidress-bedecked Lily Donaldson. I excused myself from my posse of tequila–tossers, checked my military coat, beat Leslie Bibb to the first open bathroom, locked the door, snapped the above photo, removed my pants, stuffed them in my purse, and walked back out. First rule of partying: Always wear a shirt that covers your ass. Her daring fashion choice must not have worked too well: I was just told that I’m not pretty. Flash back to seventh grade. about 20 hours ago from TweetDeck Awww. It’s ok. Shirts as dresses are totally on trend! You are SO New York! You are Missouri’s Best Dressed! Don’t listen to hatorz!
Cary Randolph Brings The Parade Float To You
Mary Rambin's Head to No
Internets
Ironically, Irony Eludes Rachel Sklar
Shira Lazar Talks About Important Stuff And Things
How Can Emily Brill Ever Take You Seriously Again, NYT?
Rachel Wins Teh Prize
“We don’t have to get legally married, but I want a ring and a party.” — Rachel
David Karp, inventor of tumblarity (the most obnoxious game since Farmville), posted this a few hours ago after several vom inducing cutesy posts between the two of them. Mainly vom inducing because I’ll never have cutesy tumblr posts about me.
Coming on the heels of a lovely European vacation, I think we all know what this means. It means somewhere a pelt wearing donkey is balling her fists screaming “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
Cary Randolph Thinks She's Rhianna
