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Internets Mary Rambin, scientific name: mexicanus drunkanius, has at last been photographed eating naturally. Scientists hid behind chorizo stands on the street for weeks, hoping to capture the elusive moment. I know. When I saw this pic, I laughed, I cried, I called my mom and told her I loved her. I knew we were making history right here, folks. Yes, we finally know it’s true: one time, Mary Rambin ATE SOMETHING. Enjoying some michter’s whiskey with the gf, good stuffabout 1 hour ago from Tweetie This could be any one of 4.5 million women, and could have been going on for six months or nine days. Kevin basically wipes his nose with women so I really don’t care enough to find out what the story is. I just wanted to let Julia Allison know so she could update her excel spreadsheet.
Emily Brill, ultimate narrator, is troubled by your immature behavior. Troubling. Please read. RT @clairecm “how Twitter reinforces the tendency of adults to behave like hs students…” http://bit.ly/2d8juy1:59 AM Nov 2nd from web I used to find it troubling that a 27 year old girl insisted on dressing like a 65 year old matriarch on her way to brunch at the Ladies’ Club, but since no one has seen ol Brill lately we assume she got a stylist and fixed that situation. More troubling is the fact that 12 or so years after the rest of the planet discovered that people act like assholes online, Emily is still shaking her head when she encounters such behavior. Three words should bring you back to reality, Emily…your blog comments. Nevar forget. thatdopeallison, everyone’s favorite failwhale, spent her Halloween wearing what ever the that is there. My outfit for a night. Not really a costume, so much as a reason to wear my pink tights! Which everyone loved, by the way. Wow! A bunch of drunk people at a tumblrs anonymous meeting LOVED your target tights. AWSE! Oh no, not saying I don’t believe you. No I do. No, I DO. No, oh come on you don’t have to… This made me feel kinda special. Can every day be the day after Halloween? JESUS. Could anyone be more insanely desperate for validation? Look at me, everyone likes me!!! What a douche. Allison honey, you aren’t special. Everyone on facebook gets those invites, kay? Everyone who offers McGlynn some vagina gets their pic taken. You’re a fat farm girl waiting to happen, not Edie Sedgewick. Stop waddling around acting like you’re hot Crap, it’s just embarrassing for everyone. You should hear the Crap these famous people talk about you behind your back. Seriously, just stop it.
Halloween Internets Julia Allison Look, I expected “slutty ballerina” from the likes of Julia Allison. She could wear a nun habit and with a bedazzler and a dream it would be “slutty nun habit”. But I sort of hoped for a tad more creativity out of the self-proclaimed media elite. I mean, really, Rachel Sklar? (I have judges robes for Slutty Sotomayor, but that’s my runner up) (I assume people know that these costumes ideas are IRONIC)about 10 hours ago from TweetDeck I can’t find my Susan Boyle wig or my judge’s robes! (Tho I do have a judge’s wig). I have a windbreaker….Slutty Ahmadinejad?about 6 hours ago from TweetDeck Dammit, I was sure I had a ray gun. (Slutty Sci-Fi chick.)about 6 hours ago from TweetDeck It’s not “ironic” it’s lazy. Elsewhere, in the tumblr compound, Jac Banjotinto is “partying with shredder”, and David Karp (who apparently dressed up as something from Star Trek) thinks tumblanterns are “clever”. The only person with any sense at all seems to be OMGBEARS McCarthy: Wow. I thought Halloween last year was as lame as they could get. I was proven wrong. Can I go home now, please?27 minutes ago from TweetDeck It’s comforting for all us nobodies to know that web and media royalty are just as boring as we are on Halloween. Nick McGlynn, biggest hands in NYC, decided the only way to get the ladies was by being a walking gadget. MY INSPECTOR GADGET COSTUME IS COMPLETE!! Well, points for apparently constructing it himself. Cary, the only midwestern girl in NYC, wants to help you become a badass! That’s right, gurl has a foolproof plan to make your cool factor go through the rizoof! How to be a skater girl in New York City: Yes my friends, Cary is a SHREDDAH! She even offers a point by point listy to ensure everyone knows you are RAD! Highlights include: Fill your iPod with classic slacker jams. I listen to a lot of Sublime and Citizen Cope whilst weaving through traffic. Skate to the bars! Nothing, I repeat, nothing will make you and your gang of lady ruffians look cooler than hanging out with your board propped against the bar at your friendly, bro-centric, neighborhood watering hole. My preferred public house is Brother Jimmy’s. You’ll own the place without even trying (very hard). Remember that despite the torn jeans, bloody palms, and scabby elbows, you are a total bad ass. There is nothing you can’t handle. You’re a girl on a skateboard in New York City! There you have it! Your absolute number one way to be a BAD AZZ…if it were 1989 and you were Christian Slater.
National GOMIgraphic Captures First Pictures Of Mary Rambin Eating
Kevin Rose Has Girlfriend, God Laughs At Your Loneliness
Kevin Rose, revolving door for vaginas, is calling someone ‘gf’ again on his twitter. This may have been going on for a while and I didn’t notice. What, don’t give me that look. I don’t check his twitter everyday, he’s boring as watching a frog sweat. Anyway, the exciting tweet:
Internets
Emily Brill Finds Your Behavior Troubling
It's Just Not A Holiday Until We Catch Up With Whatshername
Be Something Besides "Slutty" For Halloween Already
Shalloween – Nick Mc’s Inspector Flasher
Cary Is Gleaming That Cube All Up In NYC
I’ve been shredding all over Manhattan for about six months now. When I began, I didn’t know grip tape from wheels, and I thought trucks were what my boyfriends drove in high school. These days every time I pop into a friend’s apartment or our preferred brunch spot avec deck, I hear the same sweet song: “I want to learn!” Buddies, you now have no excuse not to join me on my next island cruise.