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Internets Sarah Lacy, lover of foreign culture, is having a little tummy twubble after eating uh…rice and vegetables: my stomach seems to be punishing me for three weeks of chinese food. (was worth it btw) i’d kill for a baked potato and a diet coke.about 15 hours ago from web So basically she would rather have Irish food? Why not just say “Thanks for the great time, China! I like yer little boats and Crap! By the way, your beloved cuisine that has been a staple of your daily life for over 5000 years? Fucking sucked! Haha just kidding. Seriously though, would it kill you to build a Cheesecake Factory before I visit again?” Scary Randolph, who’s been spending most her life living in a gangster’s paradise, is proud to announce she thugs: Miss Thugsalot is currently touring the mean ghettos of her youth, schoolin bortches and not takin no disrespect, yawl.
Good lord. Randi Zuckerberg, the suckuparific sister of facebook, has spent way too much time the last few days telling Julia Allison her hair is pretty and all the boys totally like her. Sparkly dress? Check. Sparkly toenail polish? Check. Sparkly friend? @juliaallison check. Ready for @davemorin’s party!11:56 PM Oct 17th from TwitterBerry Ok, what? Calm the down. I see Sparkles there convinced you to dress up as a sparkly bruise so you could match. And here I thought you were a successful lady working person, not Jessica Wakefield trying to join the Unicorn Club. Anyway, it goes on… Enjoyed a yummy “morning-after-a-super-fun-night” brunch w/Brent @juliaallison & some of our fav Stanford GSB buddies. Now, course 2 = advil4:50 PM Oct 18th from web And on… http://bit.ly/1KBCuy One of my fav photos from @davemorin’s bday party last night w/gorgeous gals @juliaallison & @Aubs6:29 PM Oct 18th from web And on… @juliaallison miss you already, love! Come back and see us anytime :)about 1 hour ago from web Jesus Christ. Look, I know how it feels to be the plain dorky girl. But you cannot keep losing your Crap everytime the kind of pretty girl pays attention to you. Have some dignity! Stop fawning and drooling, no matter how much you hang out with those girls you will not be prom queen! Now get back to playing Q3A with the future engineers of america club or something. Caroline McCarthy, of the huge tracts of land McCarthys, has some rather strange ideas of what constitutes national economic recovery: Swag alert: We have slap bracelets, light-up badges, and Silly Putty. OMG, the recession is so over.about 14 hours ago from TweetDeck I for one think it is premature to declare this recession over before there is kettle corn and glow sticks, but I applaud Caro’s cautious optimism. Mr. Lodwick, of odwick.com and every teen hipster’s fantasy, has decided he hates you and wants to make you suffer. That’s right – Jake is OUT OF HERE: I’m going to take a 30 day break from blogging. I’m going through one of those phases where I cut elements out of my life in order to think clearly and this is one of them. I’ll miss you; see you November 17th! Well bummer! I’d say that sucks and my life will be empty until Jake returns to us, but it’s just a blog and I really don’t care. Cary Randolph, the sort of sad, angry version of Emily Brill, is taking her brilliant proseinating skillz on back to MO: I’m taking a long sabbatical in the home state for the next two weeks. What better time than now to give a big, red-lacquered middle finger to such corporate mainstays as “accrued vacation days” and visit friends on my parents’ dime? Or to put it another way, I’ve completely lost my mind. Since the airfare is nonrefundable, I plan on doing the following: * Impress college friends with my wacky “New York fashion”. J/K! Same ol’ Cary! LOL! SAME OL CARY!!!!!! What I don’t get is didn’t she just start birthing articles about being the only MO girl in NYC for some backwater paper? Seems weird to announce that and then scamper off back to Wherethehole Missouri for two weeks of what? Dressing like a lumberjack and passin’ chaw around? Oh well, have fun Cary. Sarah Lacy, globetrotter, is uh…not ignoring you! Nope! Her uh…phone…is lost! Or something! Dear everyone who keeps DM-ing, @-ing me, and Facebook-ing me: I’m not ignoring you. I’m in China and can’t access either site. In fact, I can’t even access this site. In fact, TypePad is pretty hit or miss too so this may or may not post. So forgive the silence. It’s not you. It’s me (and the great firewall.) Yeah um, she didn’t get your message. Her voicemail is being SO weird. No, she’s totally not mad you guys! She uh…well work has been really crazy, and twitter is being all weird. She’s not ignoring you!
Attention China, Your Food Makes Sarah Sick
Scary Is Way Thugger Than You
Internets
One Time, Regina George Punched Randi, And It Was AWESOME
Caro Has Unique Criteria For "End of Recession"
Jake Takes A Break
Break Lodwick
Scary Taking That Show On The Road
* Smoke cigarettes inside the bar.
* Sneer at my ex-boyfriends, like “Don’t you still wish. Ex.”
* Cheer on the Dear Old Varsity at the Homecoming game.
* Drink too much every single day and night.
* Drive cars on highways!
* Hold my best friend’s new baby and feel sorry for myself because I’ll probably never trick some poor unsuspecting gentleman into marrying me and thus I’ll never have my own bambini.
* Run on wilderness trails and commune with nature.
* Fly down Hanley on my Zig Zagger and be a ragamuffin.
* Slouch around and look cool, like, “Ugh, I’m so New York now.”
* Generally be insufferable.
Sarah Lacy Is Probably Ignoring You, And You Only
