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Mommy Blogging Sanctomommies are pulling out their opinions in preparation for the greatest internet debate since whatever the last debate was about. It seems Rebecca Eckler is “ditching” her 10 week old son for six days in order to “lie around, read, visit the spa, and eat a lot of guacamole”. Rebecca, from the heights of her superiority, huffs “I really don’t understand women who can’t or won’t leave their babies behind for a night, if they have trustworthy help”. And just to make sure we know she’s not leaving the baby with a bowl of water and a newspaper while shouting “Adios” as she breezes out the door, she informs us: My fiancé’s mother is moving into my house for the week and I have a wonderful nanny as well. It’s not that I’m not going to miss him, because I am dearly. But since I can’t read the mind of a two-month-old baby, I’m not sure he’s really going to miss me. She goes on to apparently try and preempt any mommy judgement: I’m sure a lot of people will ask (and I’ve asked this myself) if I’m a coldhearted bortch for leaving a two-month-old behind for almost a week. I’m not. My fiancé and I really wanted a baby. We’re not cold-hearted. What we are is super laid back. Finally, she spends the last paragraph limply defending her decision: …I think that it will be good for him. I think that, even from his early age, I’m teaching him a sense of independence. I’m teaching him that he has a lot of people around him who love him and will take care of him. Is me going away and leaving him behind a little selfish at his age? Um, absolutely. I admit that fully. Am I lucky to have such wonderful help? Um, absolutely. Will I miss him? Um, absolutely. But will I enjoy my vacation? Um, absolutely. Seriously, I’m not sure why she felt the need to write this. It sounds like she’s not nearly as ok with her choice as she would like us to believe. If she’s so secure in her convictions that what she is doing is perfectly fine then just go and do. Nobody cares if you want to dump your son for a tan and margaritas. WASPS have been handing their kids off to nannies the minute they are home from the hospital for 10 generations, and none of them seem to feel the need to justify it. No need to write a weird “talk to the hand” post defending your non-controversial decision. Elena, Art of Raising The Most Difficult Baby Ever, has had a terrible few months. Apparently she thought babies would sleep for 2 hours stretches when put down, and she would be able to do what she wanted until she felt like interacting with her meatloaf again. WRONG: I went from a 24 hour day where I could work and do things I wanted virtually at any time of the day and night to 3 naps a day that lasted anywhere from 10 to 30 minutes…needless to say, I’ve had very very frustrating days in the beginning. I have to admit I’d get VERY frustrated, because I wasn’t getting anything done and I didn’t think it was appropriate for me to do them when Lexi was up. She has at last pulled herself out of her self-taught baby expert pose and talked to other mothers. Shockingly, she found out she does not have the only baby alive that needs attention and only sleeps in random spurts. She got her husband to take the baby a couple of hours a day so she can blog, and she’s even starting to get stuff done now that her baby is finally settling in for full 40 minute naps. But omg you guys, babies are still like, a lot of work and stuff: I don’t eat, I don’t drink, I don’t take time to go to the bathroom (unless I can’t hold it)- I just work, work, work. And then when she wakes up, I catch up on all that eating, drinking, peeing business :)…My next goal is to find a way to work out and to do my hair/light make up/moisturize/take a consistent shower in the morning. It’s awesome that after six months she’s finally figuring out how to balance her time and enjoying motherhood. But this all sounds like fairly typical new mom stuff – stuff she really would have expected had she actually listened to the other mothers who were telling her “it’s going to be crazy at first”, rather than dismissing them with her visions of nursing in a cloud bed and feeding and naps timed as she desired. But really, kudos to her for at least not tossing the kid in the bathroom and ignoring her so she can blog and moisturize. At least she seems to care about being a good mother.
Heather Armstrong, expert on bullying, is apparently up on the PanelPicker, where people go to vote on speakers or panels they would prefer to see at SXSW. The panel she is listed to share with another woman? “Dumb, Lonely & Fat: Dealing w/Internet Criticism“. The description claims:
Dooce Mommy Blogging Real Estate Have you always wanted to wander the hallowed home of Heather Armstrong? Well now you can! STATELY BRICK TRADITIONAL ON TREE FILLED LOT IN FEDERAL HEIGHTS! TERRIFIC FLOOR PLAN INCLUDES LARGE KITCHEN, DINING, AND FAMILY ROOM AREAS, WALK IN PANTRY, FORMAL DINING AND LIVING ROOMS, FINISHED ATTIC SPACE IS IDEAL FOR HOME OFFICE, STUDIO, OR GUEST RETREAT, HARDWOODS FLOORS THROUGHOUT, ALL BATHROOMS ARE BEAUTIFULLY UPDATED WITH TRAVERTINE TILE AND CLASSY FIXTURES, PLENTY OF STORAGE, 2 LAUNDRY ROOMS, DOUBLE STAIRCASES. GRAND MASTER BEDROOM, BATHROOM AND CLOSET SPACE. PRIVATE YARD AND OUTDOOR PATIO AREA. NEWER MECHANICAL SYSTEMS AND NEW ROOF. THERE IS ROOM FOR EVERYONE TO LIVE AND ENTERTAIN! CLASSIC STYLE WITH A CONTEMPORARY FLAIR. The 11,126 sq. ft., 9 bedroom 9 bath home is listed for $1,595,000. Does this mean the divorce is close to being final? A few of you may remember Kayla and Checkers, and their unique style of parenting. What you may not know is Kayla has a sister, Karlee – seen above with her “lover”, Bam. Following in the fine tradition of Kayla and Checkers, Karlee was recently pregnant for a second time. Evidently having never had a prenatal appointment, Karlee had quite a surprise waiting for her when she went into early labor. According to Kayla, who addressed a letter to her own child on the matter: On June 25th your aunt Karlee had surprise twin boys; Kyle Fly and Miles Trust. They were 6 weeks early so they were very tiny and under a lot of stress. They were both doing pretty good, but Kyle was barely hanging in there. He passed away last night at 4:09am. This tragic end to a tragically mishandled pregnancy is being dealt with by Karlee the only way she knows how: Resting up in this hotel with my lover Bam. Glad i got my pain med. Filled i was hurtin 2 badly. Pickin up kyles ash’s tomorrow cant wait 2 get them on necklesses 🙂 I’m not a doctor, but I am pretty sure that when you spend your pregnancy in the woods with weed instead of, I don’t know, seeing a doctor and eating properly you should maybe expect the worst possible outcome. In the 21st century in a first world country with a dozen different welfare programs for expectant women, I’m a little confused as to how it got to this point in the first place. Anyone with a 7th grade education knows you need to see a doctor while you’re pregnant. If you want to be free spirited whatevers living in the woods, fine – but at least see a doctor a few times. What is wrong with these people? Heather Armstrong, valedictorian of everything, apparently went to Wyoming for some family thing. Per her cycle of emotional breakdown -> all better now, she first informed us that she had “walked right up to the window of a nervous breakdown and saw exactly what it looked like inside. It’s a Craphole. And it’s scary as hole”…and then posted that after not sleeping for three days, a night of sleep has solved all her problems: Jenna Cole, victim of Mormon racism and e-book advocate, is finally off at college doing high educated person things and trying to lose weight. Well…she was trying. Seems she’s throwing in the towel on her “That Weight Loss Challenge 3”, announcing on her blog that she’s “putting my weight loss efforts on hold” until she gets through school. According to Jenna she will also be halting any weight loss posts for the summer, saying: I have my whole life to lose weight. This chance to finish school in person, sitting in classrooms discussing what we’ve read and what it means, isn’t going to come again for me. I want to give as much of myself to the experience as I can mentally handle. However a source tells us this excuse is a bunch of bullhockey, claiming “She’s told friends she’s pregnant again. That’s why she’s not doing the diet, she’s too sick from morning sickness.” Could Jenna be expecting little Bathroom Baby 2? Or, free from the locked up cheese regime, has she simply packed on a cheese baby?
Rebecca Eckler Will Ditch Her Baby
Art Of Making A Baby Has Less Selfie Time
Dooce Mommy Blogging
Dooce Will Expert About Bullying
“Stately” Dooce Manor Up For Sale
Karlee And Bam Are Kayla And Checkers 2.0
Dooce Continues To Sound Like A Graduate Of Therapy
Is That Wife Preparing For Another Bathroom Baby?
